Today’s happiness moment happened when I was upstairs doing yoga. I was lying  on my mat, stretching into good feelings when I heard thumping and banging and giggles coming from downstairs. Jenna and her cousin were playing together in the family room. We have so much smoke here from the Washington fires that going outside isn’t all that enjoyable. 

I heard them giggling and bouncing all the way through my practice and during my meditation. When I finally came downstairs I discovered they’d made a survival course made of cushions through the “lava” on the floor – yet another use for our indestructible red carpet. They pulled me in and I too was hopping from one cushion to another. Sadly I drowned when I failed to balance on the corner of Jenna’s blue yoga mat which was “water”. Fortunately they rescued me before continuing on the course. 

Having done so many quiet years when we were away – times where the kids didn’t have that strong core of friends to hang out with – I am so thankful and grateful that they both have BFF’s right across the yard. Their mom is one of mine as well – bonus happiness and gratitude. 

It is so important for me to keep reaching for these happiness feelings. I still have those punch in the gut moments that dad is really gone. I had another one today driving with Jenna. She mentioned how josh had wanted to share a video he had made with dad. They never had that chance, but josh won an award for the video. Jenna mentioned how proud dad would be of him and how he will he watching him get the award from heaven. Gut punch. Cry. Gratitude that I had him as a dad.