happiness

Bag of chips

I had coffee (or tea for me) with a couple of dear old friends this morning. I’ve known them since forever and our families are tied way back. I love these kinds of relationships – where the common bonds are so close it’s just easy.

We were laughing about how much different it is for kids learning how to drive now. One of them mentioned how bad it is now that texting exists. I said but when we were learning how to drive we had a coffee in one hand, and were usually waving the other one around doing something stupid. And one of them piped in and there was always a bag of chips stuck between our knees.

I laughed and told them a story of how I once almost ditched the suburban doing a turn while eating chips. The steering wheel got caught on the chip bag and for some reason my hand refused to let go of the bag almost sending me crashing into the ditch. They giggled and said the same thing had happened to them except they hit black ice and the driver had a hand in the chip bag. After doing a 360 and ending up in the ditch the chip bag was still intact – car needed a little help.

I love sharing these kinds of stories. Stupid, silly laughter stories of days gone by. That is happiness.

 

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happiness

Sharing stories

I have made a “mom friend” at ball this season. We bonded right away and the more we have talked the more we have realized that we share much of the same story. The details are different, but the theme of our marriages and subsequent breakups are pretty much the same. In a really unique way we understand what being this type of single mom means. And while that means there’s a lot of shared heartache, there are a lot of familiar funny stories.

Tonight we sat at the ball field and laughed while we shared some of the highlights from over the years. We both commented how nice it is to have someone who just gets the situation we are in. It can be a difficult one to explain to others and it makes it so much more simple to just be able to give the eyeball to each other, a quick nod, and say yep, I get it. 

I really like this woman, making good friends does not happen very often so I’m really grateful for the moments when this opportunity presents itself. That is happiness.

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happiness

Similar values

I spent some time today talking with a friend about values and how we wanted to live life. I love it when I can chat with someone who feels the same way I do about family and parenting and faith and such things. It’s rare and important. I mean, it’s also important to make sure there’s balance and I love having friends who see things differently and make me think about why I feel a certain way about something. But, sharing the same feelings about the big things is also important. It’s part of what drives me to keep with my tribe – knowing that there’s that group of people who have my back and I have theirs – we all share the same core values.

It brings me happiness remembering why it is I feel the way I do about family, parenting, and how to treat our neighbours.

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Every time you make a leap

I talk all the time about the importance of my tribe and I had a moment today where a girlfriend reminded me just how lucky I am to have these people in my life. I was overthinking and sorting out some things and she said:

I’ve got your back every time you make a leap. Whether you succeed or not, I don’t care and at least you’ll learn. I’m like your tiny cheerleading team.

Friends like this – this is what helps me keep my stuff together. I was talking to a lady tonight (who I am in the process of friending and bringing into the tribe – she’s awesome) and we were talking about how it takes a village to keep our lives together. She has a circle of girlfriends who help her as much as mine do me.

I am so grateful that I am back where I have my tribe – whether they are family or friends. Every time I make a leap someone’s got my back, and I’ve got theirs too. And that is happiness.

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Tea and talk

I met a girlfriend for tea and a visit this afternoon. When I get together with a good friend I always think of these two older ladies I saw one day when we were in Italy for my cousin’s wedding. Two ladies in their 80s were walking down the street arm in arm with their heads thrown back in laughter, and it was so easy to see that they were enjoying a great moment with each other. As I passed them I thought I need to make sure that as I get older I have girlfriends like this in my life. I’ve always valued my friends, but the older I get the more I understand just how important it is to have that close girl-tribe.

We laughed and shared stories today over our tea/coffee that made the man at the table behind us visible cringe – which of course made it that much funnier. If he ever really wanted some insight as to how two middle aged ladies talk he really got an earful today! I love these friends that you can just be so raw with, we were all over the place in our conversation – everything from divorce to death to children to dating to God – nothing is off limits and everything can be laughed about and put into perspective.

Thank God for my friends – this is happiness.

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happiness

Just be happy now

Just be happy now

Out of this will come the miracles you seek (The Key by Joe Vitale)

Once I realized hope was missing from my life, I’ve been focusing on bringing it back to the centre of my being. If I don’t have hope what is the point? I don’t mean that my life was hopeless and that I was deep in dark despair or the world was ending. I mean I had forgotten to keep hoping for better things, that the rainbow is coming, that I can dance in the storm –  I forgot to be happy now.

My life has been a series of miracles over the past two years. Sometimes in the day to day stuff that stresses me out I forget just how much God has provided for me. Slowly but surely I am getting everything I ever wanted and just because there are some blips along the way does not mean that if I keep hope, if I stay happy, if I am clear about what I want,  that these miracles won’t continue.

I spent a big part of the day today in quiet meditation, clearing my heart and mind and focusing on what I want. I said to my friend while we were standing on the beach the other day that maybe I need to make a list of exactly what I want in life so I am clear about where I want to be going – so that’s what I did. Amazingly, I already have a lot of the things I want, which gives me faith that the other things are possible as well.

I realized that even with daily stress stuff, divorce stress stuff, kid stress stuff, I can just be happy now. Because if not now – when?

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I’m glad I have a friend like that 

We finished off our Vancouver Island trip tonight with fish and chips by the water with my friend. They were perfect fish and chips, we watched an otter swimming around and shared stories while the kids played. 

When we were done we walked to her car and did our hugs goodbye. As she drove away I said to the kids I’m so glad I have a friend like that. And it’s true. Good friends are a real treasure and that is happiness. I’m thankful for my tribe. 

On our way to the airport we stopped and had one last goodbye moment at the ocean before heading back to what Alberta calls spring.  It has been a happy trip. 

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