happiness

It has begun 

Summer that is. We had our first trip to the creek this afternoon. Nothing says summer like watching kids run into the freezing mountain water. This is one of my favourite activities and we were in one of our favourite spots. 


It’s just happiness in its simplest form – it comes right from the depths of my soul. I am so thankful I am mom to these kids and that we get to do so many things together. 

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Bad boy boot camp 

Drishti is being a total turd lately. So much so that he’s been put in bad boy boot camp – and he’s not a fan of this at all. 

It’s interesting this work we are doing – I need to command his respect, and also his trust. So I have to make him listen to me, and also build a relationship with him based on trust and respect. 

It’s a work in progress. Slowly but surely we are making progress. 


He forces me to keep working at it when I get scared or frustrated and want to give up because I want to have this relationship. It helps me find the determination to keep moving forward – a good skill for the rest of my life. 

Timely too as I’m feeling really overwhelmed. This whole financial black hole that Mr. X has thrown at us is exhausting. It’s made me remember that at the end of the day I have to learn to count on myself to look after the kids in every way – and that is overwhelming, scary, and t seems the next necessary step ahead. 

Things keep changing and I’m grateful that I’m getting stronger so I can keep on walking. Drishti helps me figure out the steps – and that is happiness. 

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The babies turn 16

When I was pregnant with the boy we joined a birth and baby class at the hospital. It was 8 weeks with half the focus on pregnancy and half on newborns. My kid was considerate and was born at exactly the half way mark. 

For the first year a bunch of us did weekly playgroups which gave us overtired and overwhelmed moms an outing. There was a first birthday party, and a 10 birthday party (which we missed because we were living away). 

Today we had the 16th birthday party for these babies. And all but three showed up which was pretty amazing. 


And a shot of all the siblings 


It was interesting how these kids who have no memory of each other, and us parents who have vague memories, were all able to come together and laugh and visit and share stories 

I consider moments like this to be huge blessings. It’s a special kind of happiness. It comes from good old memories, love for our kids, and sharing of happy times. 

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Grade 10 graduate

The boy wrote his last exam today and is officially on summer vacation. I can’t believe my baby is finished grade 10 – where did all that time go?

He laughed at me this morning and said I’m going to be just like you were in grade 11 mom. I hope you’re ready for that.

Grade 11 was not my finest moment. But I did remind him that I had to work like hell to make up for essentially doing nothing for an entire semester in order to graduate on time.

I am so proud of this kid. He has worked so hard and is such an amazing young man. That is happiness complete.

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Girl chats

I have a standing coffee date with my soul sister every Wednesday afternoon. We are living parallel lives which is both freaky and very cool at the same time. It’s amazing how long we need to talk since essentially the same things are happening in our lives – yet the time we share is never enough.

I am so grateful to have someone to walk this weird and wild path with. I have a couple of girlfriends actually who are on this same road and I don’t know what I would do without them. I can’t imagine what would have happened to the kids and I had all the stuff gone down the way it did and we were living away from our tribe.

Whenever I get impatient with God because things aren’t healed enough I look around at the amazing people I have in my life and I’m so grateful. That is happiness.

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Practice time 

This evening I took some time and practiced what my friend had shown me yesterday. You could call it either a game of “which one of us is going to be dominant in this relationship” or “which one of us is more stubborn”. I won tonight’s episode. He’s a good guy, and a smart guy, but also a lazy one who doesn’t want to be worked. We will change that. My friend said it’s kind of like working with a teenager and she was spot on. He would rather be in the field eating and hanging with his friends, but when I force him to do something he discovers he kind of likes it.

I have waited what seems like a lifetime for this guy and I’m so grateful he’s in my life. He brings me peace and happiness, he also helps me heal, let go of fear, find strength, and connect with God.

That’s happiness.

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