happiness

Girl chats

I have a standing coffee date with my soul sister every Wednesday afternoon. We are living parallel lives which is both freaky and very cool at the same time. It’s amazing how long we need to talk since essentially the same things are happening in our lives – yet the time we share is never enough.

I am so grateful to have someone to walk this weird and wild path with. I have a couple of girlfriends actually who are on this same road and I don’t know what I would do without them. I can’t imagine what would have happened to the kids and I had all the stuff gone down the way it did and we were living away from our tribe.

Whenever I get impatient with God because things aren’t healed enough I look around at the amazing people I have in my life and I’m so grateful. That is happiness.

Standard
happiness

Working together 

Today was dedicated to remembering the importance of my tribe, of keeping connected to a group of people in my life, to working together.

I had an old friend come out this morning and give me some help with Drishti. Both he and I needed a crash course in the importance of ground manners, and I needed to be reminded that I am the boss and he needs to respect that. She spent a lot of time with him reminding me of what I needed to be doing to make sure I have a decent horse to bond with. My relationship with him is important and it’s vital that we have clear boundaries and that he understands the rules. For me it was remembering that I need to jump in without fear and with love.

The afternoon was spent on some work things which also involves building relationships and having faith in myself. This evening I went for supper with a dear friend and we talked about everything you could possibly imagine – the poor server at the restaurant. Then we went to Women Empowering Women in Cochrane for a very powerful and emotional evening. Mental health was the topic, and there were lots of messages and emotions that came out of the evening for me – but the thing that stuck with me the most was how important it is to be vulnerable. If someone is brave enough to share their story it opens the door for others to share theirs as well – also for people to ask for help. People opened up tonight in ways that brought me to tears. We have had our own share of difficulties in our home, but everyone certainly has their own struggles and pain. Some of the stories are heartbreaking.

But the important thing is that we were all there sharing, being vulnerable, learning, not judging. It was magic and powerful.

We all depend on each other and when we can open up enough to let someone in – that is happiness.

Standard
happiness

I see God in everything 

I came into today with very mixed emotions – on the one hand it is the 16th birthday of my beloved son, on the other hand Father’s Day has become a rather difficult day in our household.

I have been doing A Course in Miracles and the lesson today was about how I see God in everything. I read it, I remembered it, I prayed about it – then I began my day.

I started by making the boy’s traditional birthday pie for his breakfast. The girl had stayed up late and left a trail of notes for him to read as he made his way downstairs telling him how much he was loved.

I thought how appropriate it was that he was eating pie this morning, not only for his tummy but also because my Dad loved pie and it was a nice way for me to remember him. There was definitely God in everything around me.

 

I dropped the girl at her morning ball game and the boy at church and then headed off to Glenbow Ranch to have a little quiet time in the flowers so I could honour my Dad. Wildflowers were my Dad’s thing and he had taken me to this park the summer before he died so we could look at the flowers.

 

After I walked around a little bit I stopped beside this wood lily which just happens to be my favourite flower of all. I sat on the side of the hill and cried a little bit (thankfully I was alone – the public crying gets to be a little much sometimes). I was looking up the hill for a while – as in the photo above – and then turned my position and looked west. I realized that from where I was sitting I could see the ranch, I could see Moose Mountain, I could see home. It was really comforting to just sit there in the quiet with the flowers around me, holding memories of my dad, and just be thankful for the life I have. I could sit there beside that flower and really, truly see God in everything.

After the girls won their ball game – and it was a very hard earned win – we took the boy out for lunch at Mr. Mikes. Talk about trying to cram everything into one day – I was worried I wouldn’t get to spend much time with him on his birthday because the win meant that the girls were off to at least 2 more ball games in NE Calgary and the boy had to work this evening. But we grabbed the small moment and made the best of it – God in everything. 

The girls played hard this afternoon. It ended up being the same team from the morning and they battled it out for two more games to finally become tournament champions. This was no small feat – these girls were certainly the underdogs at the beginning of the season and they dominated. Jenna is still flying high. God in everything – it was easy to see as the parents cheered and laughed and as the kids played and thrived.

The win was celebrated by a very late supper with the boy at his work. This work has brought out so much in him, it has been a great step into adulthood. God in everything.

 

I gave the boy his present late last night. I had ordered custom made Mala beads a few weeks ago – it was the only thing he had asked me for. Every bead was put on with love and in prayer. It was added to a box that was filled with letters written by the important people in his life – his loved ones, his family – and a HUGE thank you to all of you who wrote the letters. He has been sitting and reading them and smiling with glistening eyes. It is something he will treasure for the rest of his life. God in everything, His hands in the love in those letters that the boy will be able to pull out and read for the rest of his life and always remember that he is loved.


This day may have started with mixed emotions, but it was a day of big happiness, and one that I am incredibly grateful for.

Standard
happiness

Playing in the tall grass

I drove in the yard today to find my boy walking through the tallest grass in the field – in the lane that we used to use to go from my parents’ house to the barn. It also goes to our house.

We used to walk and ride up this little lane when we were kids, although over the years it hasn’t been used much and now is just a tall jungle of grass, bluebells, and burrs (and the odd rhubarb plant).

I love that he lives here and now has the freedom to just hang outside in the field playing in the tall grass. This is the childhood I had always imagined for my kids. The fact that he’s almost 16 and still doing this makes my heart smile from the inside out. Happiness.

Standard
happiness

Refilling the garden

The other day I was gifted a bunch of old fashioned perennials to put into my flower garden and since it finally stopped raining today I was able to plant them. They fit perfectly with my old fashioned house and our happy new(ish) life. This house has brought love and life back to us and I hope we have been able to do the same to it. It’s got such a great energy and vibe – generations of love live here. This is happiness.

Standard
happiness

Locker clean out

My boy had his last day of classes today – almost the end of grade 10. I can hardly believe it. It feels like yesterday I was in a panic as to whether to put him in the French or English school in Quebec. And here we are, a whole lifetime later with him in the Catholic system in Alberta after taking a tour of North America.

He’s doing so well and growing into such a great young man. I feel honoured to have been such a big part of his growing process.

He texted me this afternoon asking me to bring garbage bags so he could clean out his locker. When I arrived at school it had a happy energy carried by hundreds of bodies (student and teacher alike) who couldn’t wait for summer vacation to start. This school has been such a blessing for him, we have lived a series of miracles in the last couple of years that’s for sure.

End of year locker clean out – happiness. Happy for him, happy for me. End of making his lunches!

Standard