happiness

Unplanned quiet and Clean kitchen surprise

Yesterday was a long-ass day. Most of it was good, but it still was long and involved a trip to the doctor and X-ray for my girl. As we left X-ray, I ordered us Indian food, which besides Italian is our comfort food of choice. When I arrived to pick up the food, something had gone wrong with the order and I had to wait quite a while. I’d left my phone in the car with the girl, and found myself in a place that smelled awesome, played funky music, and besides the music, was fairly quiet aside from other people coming in to pick up food.

So, I sat in their chair and waited. Waited without a friend, without a kid, without a phone, without a book. Just me and my brain. You know what? It was some of the most peaceful time I’ve had lately. I just sat there and thought of all the things I was grateful for, how much I love my town, and how my life has slowly evolved into one that I’m absolutely loving.

And then I got a discount on my food for waiting which was even better.

The girl and I got home to find out that the boy had been feeling a great deal of school stress and had decided to channel that into cleaning the kitchen. So the job I’d been really not looking forward to upon my return was done. As someone who has no “back-up adult” in our family, I can’t express how awesome it is to find some of these chores done for me without having to ask for it.

And so we sat together as a family and shared our meal, shared our time, shared our love.

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happiness

Section 7

I finally got a bunch of my section 7 expenses filed. It’s not fun, it is time consuming, and it’s frustrating to feel that I’m filing more expenses that he will refuse to pay. But I’ve got it done.

I wish this part was easier, but we are so much safer and happier, that I figure it’s the price of freedom.

So today I feel a sense of relief and joy that I know I’ve done my part. That’s all I can do.

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happiness

Explain yourself

I was telling the kids today how someone close to me had spent a lot of time trying to explain their actions – maybe justify their actions is a better way to put it. The boy looked at me and said

You should never have to explain your actions to someone else. If you’re doing the right thing – there’s never any explanation for your actions needed. Look at Grandpa – he never had to explain or justify what he did or who he was – he lived with integrity and you never had to doubt that what he said and what he did was the right thing.

I was so proud of my kid for picking up on that and understanding what it means to live by your word. I’m so grateful that my kids had my dad as a role model for as long as they did.

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happiness

Talk about it

The girl and I had an explosive moment this afternoon after school. I had decided to venture into her bedroom earlier to grab some laundry. Well that was a scarring experience to say the least.

How we handled it was interesting – I was upset but trying not to freak out too much and so was she (both for different reasons). But we quickly moved to a place where we both expressed how we felt about the disaster that was her room. And she came home and spent the evening cleaning it – no complaints. It was incredibly mature of her and I was so proud. I’ve got some awesome kids.

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happiness

Laugh yourself silly

This afternoon the girl (the social animal of our family) organized some friend time for herself. It’s the one downside of living in the country – that friend get togethers take a little more organization. She went and watched a friend play a volleyball game and then they walked to get ice cream. May not sound like much, but it’s a totally different world for her having all that independence.

The boy and I hung out and did some errands while she socialized. That kid was ON today and was cracking so many jokes my tummy hurt from laughing. Not only that, but we sat in a booth at Tim Horton’s for a while and his friends came in – not only did he acknowledge my existence in front of his friends, but I actually got to join them. That was a pretty awesome moment.

Laughter, it really is the best medicine. We needed a good belly laugh. I feel so much better for it, so much happier.

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happiness

The Christmas List

I got a massive text on my phone earlier this evening – a wish list from my daughter for Christmas. Proof that she is stuck in the years between, not quite a young adult, no longer a child. Makeup, hair accessories, earrings are on the list – but so are Lego, stuffies, and chocolate. I love it – grow up but stay a child my love.

She came into my room and sat beside me and giggled her way through her list. Christmas music is now allowed in our house (the kids put on the time ban not I).

It was just such a beautiful, normal moment. And that is where happiness is found, inside the small everyday things. It’s love, it’s happiness.

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happiness

My energy and emotions are sacred

My energy and emotions are sacred to me – I read this today and realized that more often than not I don’t consider them sacred at all. Often I let people or situations drain me of my energy and I waste emotions on things and behaviours I can’t change. But my energy and my emotions should be sacred, should be valued, should be respected. Instead of worrying about how other people will feel about that, I need to worry more about why I’m so tired because I let myself get drained. I love it.

Tonight I took the kids out to Chicken on the Way which, although a brutally unhealthy meal, brought back memories of my teen years and stopping for Chicken on the Way on the way home after a night out. We sat and ate in the car which we never do, and laughed and picked at our chicken and really enjoyed ourselves. Rule breaking -sometimes it needs to be done. It was a good use of my sacred energy and emotions. It was happiness.

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