Tag Archives: parenting

happiness

Remember That and be Happy Always (FGK-26)

This letter from Grandma made me so emotional, especially the part where she described how she had made it all the way into the hospital only to be too late for visiting times. Instead of complaining or whining about injustice, she reminds mom that she is their guest and show appreciation for being there. Considering it seems we are just starting to acknowledge the mind/body connection, it seems Grandma was decades ahead here on the ranch by reminding mom that a glad heart purifies the body. I really needed to hear that. I always had a special love for Grandma, but these letters make me love her even more, she really was a remarkable woman.

March 14, 1953

Saturday afternoon 4:15 PM

Dearest Margie:

Just have to write you and let the work go hang. Sheila and Marshall are out helping Dad de-horn and I scrubbed and waxed the kitchen floor alone. We washed clothes this morning. Trudy Usher gave Sheila a lovely bouquet of spring flowers for her birthday and Sheila wanted to leave them in with you last night but I said let’s bring them home for the weekend to enjoy them too and then take them into you on Sunday. they look so nice on the kitchen table, the whole kitchen looks so nice and shining clean now.

I haven’t done any cooking today, made Sheila a birthday cake yesterday and we ate it at supper last night.

Wish I could have seen you last night, did Helen tell you I was so near, just at the office, but rules are rules, we don’t own the place, you are their guest and we must remember and show our appreciation to them for having you there.

Sheila and Marsh went to the dance last night, Dad and I were too tired. They said it was a very nice one. Slim was there with _______ – isn’t he a rascal?

Old Smokey is really feeling cute these days, guess I’m feeding him too well, he just seems to know everything you say to him.

Sheila just came in looking frozen. She said the men weren’t going to stop for tea so I packed up a snack and some hot coffee and sent her over wth it to them.

I phoned Aunt Ruth but she was up town – her and Aileen as usual, but Gordie answered. He is all excited he is going to the boy-scouts chuckwagon race or something.

Hope you see a nice show this afternoon. We saw Clarence Buckley at the garage yesterday, the Olds school were chosen to see the judging of the fat calf show or something.

Guess the bull sale is next week, Dad says he isn’t going to buy any bulls – but we’ll see.

Marsh says Mrs. Barkley has a really good dishwasher, isn’t that nice?

Have you done any letter writing? I wish you’d write to us. Sure wish those old chicken-pox would clear up.

Sheila says all the Normans were at the dance, and Gladys strained her stomach curling but she was there anyway. Springbank is sure curling crazy.

8:30 pm

Well here I am again Marg – Bill went to town so there was only us four for supper and we are all sitting quietly around the dining room now. Sheila is hard at work on her homework, wish Marsh would do that.

Hope you are getting along good with your school work. I just phoned in and they said you are well. This phone is almost impossible though.

We had a very lovely Star meeting on Thursday night. There were people from all over the province there.

I’m sending you in a corsage of imitation heather we wore, Dorothea Andison (?) made one for each of us, they’re made out of wire and needs. Betsy Bloom the Worthy Grand Matron is Scotch so we were wearing them to please her – we hope. You can give it to Mary McKinon if you like – she’s Scotch too.

The gophers are out now – around here anyway, wonder if they get Rabies too.

Dad was riding up in the hills last week and he saw the skeleton of a moose and also som huge wolf tracks.

They are going to de-horn our calves on Monday and the Lazy J cattle too – so suppose Winnie will be bringing up a fancy tea for them eh?

How are those old legs of yours coming along lately Margie? Hope you are finding the exercises easier and that you can move them a little more every day and the back too. Do you still go down for the tank etc at around 2pm? I am praying almost constantly to help you but more so around then if it’s possible at all. we must have patience though, it takes almost 18 months to heal those nerves they say, but I am sure you will be walking before that, even though they may not be entirely healed. It is certain that a glad heart speeds up circulation and sweeps impure matter from the bloodstream and health appears. Remember that and be happy always.

I couldn’t get that record of the Lord’s Prayer for Sheila at all so I got her the medium sized suit case to match her others and a nice card and Marsh signed it from you and him. Dad and I gave her a suede jacket so with the twin sweater set she got plenty eh?

Aunt Gertie phoned and wants us to go up for dinner tomorrow, so seeing we can’t get in to see you, I guess we’ll go.

Well, I must close now and sure hope I can see you on Wednesday.

Lots and lots of love dear

From mom xxxxxxxxx

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happiness

Unplanned quiet and Clean kitchen surprise

Yesterday was a long-ass day. Most of it was good, but it still was long and involved a trip to the doctor and X-ray for my girl. As we left X-ray, I ordered us Indian food, which besides Italian is our comfort food of choice. When I arrived to pick up the food, something had gone wrong with the order and I had to wait quite a while. I’d left my phone in the car with the girl, and found myself in a place that smelled awesome, played funky music, and besides the music, was fairly quiet aside from other people coming in to pick up food.

So, I sat in their chair and waited. Waited without a friend, without a kid, without a phone, without a book. Just me and my brain. You know what? It was some of the most peaceful time I’ve had lately. I just sat there and thought of all the things I was grateful for, how much I love my town, and how my life has slowly evolved into one that I’m absolutely loving.

And then I got a discount on my food for waiting which was even better.

The girl and I got home to find out that the boy had been feeling a great deal of school stress and had decided to channel that into cleaning the kitchen. So the job I’d been really not looking forward to upon my return was done. As someone who has no “back-up adult” in our family, I can’t express how awesome it is to find some of these chores done for me without having to ask for it.

And so we sat together as a family and shared our meal, shared our time, shared our love.

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Section 7

I finally got a bunch of my section 7 expenses filed. It’s not fun, it is time consuming, and it’s frustrating to feel that I’m filing more expenses that he will refuse to pay. But I’ve got it done.

I wish this part was easier, but we are so much safer and happier, that I figure it’s the price of freedom.

So today I feel a sense of relief and joy that I know I’ve done my part. That’s all I can do.

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Explain yourself

I was telling the kids today how someone close to me had spent a lot of time trying to explain their actions – maybe justify their actions is a better way to put it. The boy looked at me and said

You should never have to explain your actions to someone else. If you’re doing the right thing – there’s never any explanation for your actions needed. Look at Grandpa – he never had to explain or justify what he did or who he was – he lived with integrity and you never had to doubt that what he said and what he did was the right thing.

I was so proud of my kid for picking up on that and understanding what it means to live by your word. I’m so grateful that my kids had my dad as a role model for as long as they did.

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Talk about it

The girl and I had an explosive moment this afternoon after school. I had decided to venture into her bedroom earlier to grab some laundry. Well that was a scarring experience to say the least.

How we handled it was interesting – I was upset but trying not to freak out too much and so was she (both for different reasons). But we quickly moved to a place where we both expressed how we felt about the disaster that was her room. And she came home and spent the evening cleaning it – no complaints. It was incredibly mature of her and I was so proud. I’ve got some awesome kids.

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Laugh yourself silly

This afternoon the girl (the social animal of our family) organized some friend time for herself. It’s the one downside of living in the country – that friend get togethers take a little more organization. She went and watched a friend play a volleyball game and then they walked to get ice cream. May not sound like much, but it’s a totally different world for her having all that independence.

The boy and I hung out and did some errands while she socialized. That kid was ON today and was cracking so many jokes my tummy hurt from laughing. Not only that, but we sat in a booth at Tim Horton’s for a while and his friends came in – not only did he acknowledge my existence in front of his friends, but I actually got to join them. That was a pretty awesome moment.

Laughter, it really is the best medicine. We needed a good belly laugh. I feel so much better for it, so much happier.

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The Christmas List

I got a massive text on my phone earlier this evening – a wish list from my daughter for Christmas. Proof that she is stuck in the years between, not quite a young adult, no longer a child. Makeup, hair accessories, earrings are on the list – but so are Lego, stuffies, and chocolate. I love it – grow up but stay a child my love.

She came into my room and sat beside me and giggled her way through her list. Christmas music is now allowed in our house (the kids put on the time ban not I).

It was just such a beautiful, normal moment. And that is where happiness is found, inside the small everyday things. It’s love, it’s happiness.

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