happiness

The story of your life 

I often feel unsettled when I think of the story of my life. It certainly didn’t go as I had dreamed and sometimes I question what I could have done differently to make things better. 

We made it (late) to church today – just in time for the sermon. One of the things the pastor said was you can trust God to write the story of your life   

And that’s it. Faith and trust. That’s what I need to fall back on. Knowing that is happiness. 

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Every girl needs a Ducky

The girl and I have a stomach bug that has stopped us in our tracks. Both of us were feeling pretty crappy this evening, so we cuddled up on the couch and watched some movies. Hotel Transylvania 2 which is an old family favorite, and Pretty in Pink – becsuse every girl needs to see that movie. And every girl needs a Ducky. Seriously. 

Little trip back to the 80s. Happiness 

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Tea and TV

The boy and I have got into the routine of spending an hour or so every evening together watching tv and drinking tea. It’s become a really nice way to unwind and share time with him. 

I find we often have to stop the show so he can tell me little things about his life, or to laugh at something funny. 

Mostly I am just so honored that these teenagers want to spend so much time with me. Family, it’s what it’s all about. It’s happiness. 

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Laughing at the table 

We had a group of family over for our thanksgiving meal today. There were about 20 of us which was perfect. 

It was so good to sit at that table and laugh and share food – they are a special bunch, our tribe. 

With all our blessings, there is a lot to be thankful for. This tribe, our family, they are the top of the list. Having a place to dig our roots into is priceless. And it’s happiness. 

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The moments between

Today was a moments between kind of day. After mom’s birthday, before thanksgiving which we celebrate tomorrow. I feel like there has been a lot going on in every aspect of my life and today I took some time to breathe, balance, and reassess where I’m at.

Things are shifting again. I guess life is full of constant change. For me security used to be represented as everything staying the same and me being able to sit in the knowledge that we are safe,  and I knew we were safe because nothing was going to change.

Things change all the freaking time. It’s like being a tree, I just have to be strong enough to bend in the winds of change.

And even though I continue to resist it, change is good. It either brings about something immediately joyful, or it brings pain which opens the door to change. 

Honestly, even though there has been a lot of pain the last couple of years, there has been so much more joy – sustainable happiness – soul fulfillment.

And in the moments between – when there are quiet spaces in life – it’s important to take notice of what is happening and be grateful. Especially this weekend as we celebrate thanksgiving.

I have so much to be thankful for – my God, my tribe, my home, my family, my friends, that miracle horse, our dog who narrowly escaped with her life a couple of days ago, and our too many cats.

We are home, we are safe, we are loved. That is a perfect recipe for happiness.

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Something about this house 

We were walking up to the house after school today and the boy stopped part way up the yard, looked up at our house, and said 

There’s something about this house. I don’t know, it’s the leaves and the snow, it’s just….

And the girl said 

It’s just home. This is the first house I’ve ever lived in that feels like home. It is filled with love and I love being home. 

I sometimes wonder if they miss their lives of privilege. They may have had a lot and lived in nice places, but they didn’t feel safe and secure and happy in any of those houses. 

The fact that this home is here for us and is holding us in love is a kind of happiness I have a hard time describing. This is my kids’ childhood- this is where their foundations begin for the adults they will become. 

Thanksgiving is a hard time for the three of us. It is a reminder of a very ugly incident in our family. And we have worked hard ever since to make happier memories to lay over that painful one. 

And moments like this I know we are on the right path, we will be ok, we are healing, we are finding happiness. 

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