happiness

State of denial

I’ve jokingly said that denial is my new coping mechanism but honestly it’s been a little bubble that has protected me the last little bit.

I’ve been able to extend my state of denial a little bit this weekend as I’ve been away with a friend. It hasn’t been completely effective, and there have been random bursts of tears, moments of holy crap this can’t be real, and shock when I remember mom is gone.

But then I go back into my bubble. It’s not that I’m hiding from reality, it’s just a lot to absorb and I’m honestly pretty grateful I have these couple of days to just be away. We watched a stupid movie tonight and I laughed like life was normal.

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