happiness

My hummingbird charmĀ 

The other day I wrote about the little chapel I discovered while out walking around Old Town Albuquerque.  For some reason I was really drawn to that space. I had been feeling kind of upset and just being there had really calmed me and brought me back to feeling peaceful and grounded.

Yesterday I was wandering about looking for little souvenirs to take back for the kids and I came across a small hummingbird charm. Hummingbirds and I seem to be very drawn to each other. I am fascinated by their small size and yet their ability to travel long distances, the way they fight with each other (way more aggressively than I would have thought), and their simple beauty. The charm was only $2.50 and for some reason I was compelled to purchase it. It came with a little quotation about the spiritual meaning of a hummingbird:

When you see a hummingbird it is very lucky indeed,

because it is known as a healer if you’re ever in need

Despite its small size it flies great distances and even flies backwards too.

A reminder to have faith and enjoy all that you do.

It seemed to be a perfect reminder of where I was at in my life right now. Learning to have faith and enjoy what I’m doing is kind of my theme at the present moment.  I bought him, the lady put him in a tiny ziploc bag and I brought him back to the hotel. For some reason last night I moved him over to my purse, even though I intended to pack him in the suitcase. As I looked at my little bird in the bag, I thought about how he looked like he was suffocating the way he was locked inside that plastic. I felt upset about this, but I wasn’t quite sure what to do about it. I didn’t want to take him out and lose him, I had planned to put him with my special rocks at home.

However, when I was standing inside the chapel today looking at the small gifts and letters that other people had left there, I was compelled to take my little bird out and place him with the other offerings. I sat for a while holding him, seeing how I felt about leaving him there. All of my feelings seemed to guide me to the realization that this was where he was supposed to be. For whatever reason my little hummingbird did not need to go home with me, he needed to stay right there in that chapel.

So, I found a nice little spot for him in a pinecone, said a prayer of gratitude and I left.

My moment of happiness today.

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happiness

Our Lady Guadalupe

I was feeling a little down this afternoon when I headed out for my walk. I’m overtired which always makes my emotions feel that much more intense (and makes me that much more unable to deal with them).

One thing I have learned over this past year is that it is always possible to find happiness in each and every moment. The kicker is to remember to allow it and to look for it. I’ve had some pretty crappy things happen in 2015 and still, every day I sat down and thought about at least one moment that made me happy and left me feeling grateful in that day.

With that in mind but still carrying a little woe is me, I went for my walk around Old Town Albuquerque. It seems every time I explore there’s another little side walkway that I have not noticed before. This time I turned at a sign for a museum and instead ended up at the doorway of a small church. 

It was like God guided me here to remind me that He’s always there holding my hand. I needed that little reminder of love and support. I felt my heart lift and lighten as I walked in the doorway.  

Inside was this beautiful mural. I stood and looked at it for quite a while (I may have also cried in front of it for a bit, whatever. I thought I was done public crying at the end of 2015 but apparently that’s not the case). It made me feel so loved and warm and cared for just standing in this small but holy space.

  

Off to the side there was a small chapel and I walked to the front and stood at the cross and prayed for a little while. Mostly I just gave thanks for all of the blessings I have in my life. I have two beautiful children who make my world complete, I have a wonderfully strong and supportive family, I have friends who hold me up and laugh with me, I have that dog and those cats who fill my heart. I am a blessedly lucky person with all of the things that bring me joy and happiness.

Sometimes I just need that quiet space to remember how happy I am. I am so thankful I was guided into this little church. It was my happiness moment today.

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