Today my heart is tired and sad. I’m working hard at forgiveness, but again it really is hard to forgive someone who not only isn’t sorry but who is actively trying to destroy me. All I know is I have to. I must keep working at it. I have to do it for me, I have to do it for the kids. I don’t want them living under the the black cloud of his hate anymore – it’s too much.
There are always little rays of sunshine in my dark days. Today when I wanted to just lie down and cry I went and focused on my Drishti.
I just want to squish him all the time
My kids spent the afternoon and evening with their aunt and uncle – my extra parents and their extra grandparents. It was cooking lesson time with Auntie Crazy and some of the cousins. They came home full of smiles and pizza.
Thank God we are home and we are safe. We have our tribe and we have each other – that is happiness.
The Sattvic Life 
I don’t think it is necessary for you to forgive. That is some hooha someone decided made sense. You, and your children, are abused mentally so why do you even contemplate forgiving. Having as little contact as possible will lighten your heart more than anything. Recognizing that some people have Grinchy minds helps.
We are supposed to have no contact which is usually works. I need to let go of the hurt and the fear – the only way I know how is to try and forgive