Sometimes it feels like this divorce will never end. Honestly, it is so frustrating to fight over and over about support that has already been decided on but that does not get paid. And we both end up spending so much money on lawyers to end up at the same place.
It’s why it’s so important for me to keep my focus on what’s important – to find my Drishti and tune in to that.
What is a Drishti?
A few years ago I first heard the term in an online yoga class I was taking. It refers to a point of focus – the idea being that where our gaze is directed our attention naturally follows. When you can focus in on a single object the chaos and distractions of the outside world disappear and you are able to let go of the anxiety and stress and can calm and focus your mind.
I would stand in tree pose and look out the window of our living room at the trees growing in the yard and focus on a branch. I would put in my mind the feeling I had when I was riding and let my love for my horses sit on that branch and become my Drishti.
So when I met this beautiful bay gelding who was named Stars, I knew that he was my Drishti and so Drishti he became.
Tonight I trudged out in the snow (snow!!!) to feed and visit him and spent a few minutes in gratitude for the fact that my drishti, my focus, the thing that I put my attention on to close out the chaos and stress of the outside world, materialized into this loving, amazing Drishti who is becoming such an important part of my life and of my healing.
This is happiness. It is also proof that that you attract that which you put your attention on. So in all this painful ugliness that keeps getting stirred up in my divorce, I can now walk outside and see my real life Drishti and know that everything is going to be ok.