happiness

We are all just walking each other home

I’ve been feeling very disconnected lately. Disconnected from God, disconnected from my tribe, disconnected from myself. Knowing that is one thing, changing it is another. And really, since I’ve been kind of mad at God lately that’s where it all starts (and ends).

I sat today and had a conversation with God about how I was feeling like he’d abandoned me. I think we all feel like that sometimes. I said my peace and then got up to carry on with my day – which meant taking a shower.

As soon as I had a head full of shampoo the water pressure dropped and it was obvious I had only a few seconds until I had no water at all. I did my best to squeeze out the soap suds and was mostly successful by the time the water was completely gone.

Because we live in this crazy old house, nothing is simple. Our water comes from the well up the hill and provides for me, the barn, my cousin, and my mom. And it’s all been patched and repaired by generations of ranchers. So you really have to understand the system to make anything work. I have a very basic understanding of the system.

I called my cousin’s husband who ended up being out of town and he sent over my nephew to try and fix it. We went down the hill to the well and FaceTimed for assistance and figured out the problem (broken pipe). My nephew got one of the guys who works on the ranch and they went down and fixed it.

Then they came to our place to turn it on and there was an issue with the pump. It looked like we wouldn’t have water all night, but my cousin in law showed up this evening and magically solved the problem so we have water again. Hooray. Running water is a big deal.

As I was on the hill earlier today I realized how connected we really are, this tribe of mine. It helped me remember how important it is to belong to a group. How we all need each other to get through.

I had a really nice visit with my mom tonight, she was looking better than I’ve seen her in a while. There is a life long connection and one that will carry through the ages.

And so I work on repairing my connection to God. Because if we are all just walking each other home, he is home. And that is happiness.

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