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Snowbirds

This afternoon we went out for a family walk. Forced family fun time with my monsters, my sister and her kids, and my mom. As we were getting ready my cousin texted saying the Snowbirds were about to buzz our house. They were at the air show in Springbank and could see them heading for our place. We dashed outside and had an awesome private show 

This was taken on my iPhone – it was much more impressive. I’m amazed at how they hold their formation.  
I mentioned to my sister after that if you were into planes it was the equivalent of us wanting to ride in the RCMP musical ride. I have a friend who did this – what a dream job. 

It was a happiness moment to stop and watch the planes dance past us over and over. Time was suspended and there was just us and the sky show. 

Before we went out walking we were talking about how every day without Dad just gets harder and harder. Doing all the things we used to do with him now without him is so difficult. But he loved life and loved us and I know he wants us to keep on finding happiness, so I will keep looking for it every single day.   

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Dog days of summer

Happiness moment today was hanging out at the creek with kids and cousins and dogs. It was hot and sunny and beautiful. We are so blessed we have the most beautiful place on earth to enjoy. 

   
In case you were wondering what the happiest dog in the world looks like, this is it. Dottie went to the creek for the first time ever today. She thought it was possibly the most awesome thing she has ever done. 

 
This place makes my soul shine. I am thankful every second that we are here and able to enjoy it. 

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Don’t drink from the bowl

Today’s happiness moment: sitting with Jacob while he ate his chicken noodle soup tonight. He says you know what I miss about grandpa? His chin chopper and his rules: no drinking from the bowl, no talking to the water. Then he looked at me, grabbed his bowl and took a big gulp of soup right from it. He looked around with a smirk and said do you think grandpa saw that? 

Missing Dad does not seem to be going away, if anything it gets more intense, but I love that we have these warm memories to share with each other. 

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The thunder rolls, and the lightening strikes….

Earlier this evening I had the unexpected pleasure of being alone in the house. I celebrated by happily enjoying a big ole piece of chocolate cake in front of the TV. Because sometimes such things need to be done. 

Suddenly the house felt like it was lifted up off it’s foundation and then dropped and shaken side to side all the while being completely lit up. Thunder and lightening hitting at exactly the same time. I could feel it right in my heart. I rolled off the couch onto the floor shaking, Ella’s eyes were bugged right out of her head and she was literally climbing the walls screeching rawwwwarrrrr over and over, Dottie was running wildly around the room whining so loud it was like a scream. 

I was lying there thinking what do I do? I’m going to die, what can I do? Oh right – Grandma would be furious with me for being so stupid as to have the TV on. I managed to turn it off and then looked outside to check the buildings. My cousin’s house was ok as was the barn and the other buildings. I tried mom but she was not answering. It was pouring rain by then so I didn’t run outside. The kids called from up at my cousin’s to say they were ok – shaken but ok. So I figured we were fine. 

Fortunately a neighbor was driving by because the lightning struck a fence post at the end of the yard. In the opposite direction of where I had been looking naturally. I was looking at buildings and tall trees – it decided to hit the fence post. The neighbor came in and started putting out the  fire. At the same time my cousin was coming home and saw the smoke. So it was the CL fire truck and fire fighters to the rescue. 

See that person in brown holding the hose? Same cousin I wrote about a few days ago who carried herself so elegantly at the Stampede. If I’m ever in crisis this is a person I want in my corner. 

The CL fire truck.  
 

My happiness moment today: the kids and I went and saw Minions. It was funny but no where near as good as Inside Out. Obviously I’m not used to going to movies in Calgary. The theaters were always almost empty in Roanoke, and they’re also pretty quiet in Cochrane. We walked into the theatre in Crowfoot a half hour before it started (very unusual for us. We usually arrive when they’re playing the commercials) and the only spots left were front row. We sat down in front and I looked back for Jacob – he had plunked down in a solo seat half way down – and a lady about a third of the way up started beckoning to me. She was there alone with four kids – bless her- and she pulled her kids up onto one row – so the 5 of them were sharing 3 seats- and gave us her other seats. I thanked her and we chatted a bit. She was from Cochrane and was waiting out the storm before driving home. This was the afternoon storm, not our electric explosion. 

I realize I get caught up sometimes by the jerk that cuts me off, the person who speaks rudely to me, or any number of other wrongs that can happen. But the world is full of wonderful, kind people and I am so much better to focus on them. Random acts of kindness are like rays of sunshine on a dark day and I’m grateful I got to experience one today. Happiness on a thunder storm day! 

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Banff for a day 

Happiness moment today was being in the mountains with my monsters and my mom. Being surrounded by the mountains hugs my soul and makes everything feel just a bit better. It rained a bit while we were there, which gave us the most brilliant rainbow as we drove out of the park. 

The kids with their candy loot from the candy store and Jenna’s toy. 

  
Added bonus was taking them to see the merman. They were less impressed than I’d hoped but I still think he’s cool. 

 

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Inside Out

Last night the kids, mom, and I went to see the movie Inside Out. It was an excellent movie – but while I knew it was a movie about emotions I didn’t realize it would unleash a tornado of our own emotions. 

Jacob and I drove home after the movie and he had an emotion explosion. It included a few things, but high up there was his sadness at losing his grandpa. I pulled the car over and gave him a big hug and held him while I listened to him vent out his feelings. I had already vented out my feelings in the darkness of the theatre. Good thing I’m getting used to this public crying thing. Sigh. 

The really great thing about this movie is that it opened the door for us to talk more about feelings. 

Jacob and I had to go into town to do some errands today and on the way in he said well, anger and sadness really got away from me yesterday. It was like anger was pushing things full throttle while sadness was touching all my memories and making them sad. I think fear was hiding over in the corner crapping his pants. 

I really appreciated how the movie showed that sadness could touch happy memories and make them sad. We sure feel that way about the memories of my Dad. I’ll remember something fun we did and for a moment I’m happy and then I remember Dad is gone and my memory becomes sad. Jacob said he felt the same way. It was good to know also that sadness was an important emotion in working things through. 

My favorite part was when the teenage boy saw the girl and all his emotions freaked out shouting girl girl girl 

We went to the mall before going to the Farmer’s Market and he saw his emotions there:

Look mom, here’s my anger and sadness.    
My happiness moment was at the Market. There was a guy there with remote control cars and Jacob and I raced each other and giggled and played together. The guy gave us extra time so we had almost a half hour to laugh and enjoy doing something together. A rich happiness moment. 

 

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Rebel Yell

I finished off Stampede Week by eating an entire bag of Those Little Donuts. I’m not kidding and I’m not proud of it (I’m a little proud actually). After serious testing over the years I can tell you that they’re the best mini donuts in the park – probably because they make them as you order them. And we ordered a lot last night. A bag for everyone and then it was fight to the death to hold onto yours. I lost one of my donuts to Jenna because I wasn’t paying  enough attention, but after that I held my bag closer. A very non-Ayurvedic meal, but a fun one nonetheless. 

But now that Stampde is over I need to get back to a better routine. Who am I kidding? I’ve been in a bad eating routine since we moved back. Better than it could have been, but I most certainly dealt with Dad’s illness and death by eating every piece of cake I could get my hands on. 

Now is the time to change that. I want to have lots of happy and healthy years ahead of me, and I know the best way to do that is to honour my body and soul. 

I haven’t gone out walking since Dad died – not because of Dad, but because of all the grizzly bears in the area. Anyone who tells you they’re all disappearing doesn’t live where I do, that’s for sure. On my walking path there was a mama and her triplets and then a few days later a male. I became bear-a-noid and did my working out on the elliptical at home. Fine, but not nearly as good for my body and soul. 

Today, bears be dammed, my Dotted Dog and I headed out for a walk/jog. I’m not a runner, but I’ve done the couch to 5K program a few times and liked/hated it. I don’t mind small runs when I’m in shape – no desire for long distance ones. I put some music on my phone – music from a time when I was younger and felt strong and powerful – and headed off. 

  
As I was jogging along singing loudly to Rebel Yell (which I knew would have the added benefit of scaring away any wildlife – unless they thought I was dying and therefore easy prey), I realized that was exactly what I am starting to do – finding my own rebel yell. Three years ago my body and soul were both broken. I had finally realized that unlike Sleeping Beauty, my Prince Charming was not going to rescue me and that I had better wake my own self up. And that I have. Sometimes I feel weak and not good enough, and then I remind myself of how far I’ve come. Three years ago I couldn’t walk across the room without being in unbearable pain. Now I run around, ride horses, garden, play with the kids, go walking, and do yoga – all impossible things three years ago. Thank goodness I decided to become my own hero. In doing that I also showed the kids they can become their own heros too. 

I think this building a better me is part of why I love living in this old house we live in so much. I can relate to this place. This house has been neglected and was empty, but it is deeply loved by the entire (extended) family. We are pouring life and love back into it. Good things come from this house. 

My happiness moment was Jacob lying with his huge teenage body on the couch. He looked at me as I walked by and said mom, please don’t tickle me. Which of course meant I sat right on top of him pinning him down and counted all his ribs. When he laughs like that he’s just like little Jacob of his younger days. The dog got so upset that he was getting all the attention she jumped on top of him as well – which worked out for me as I was able to tickle him better. Small happiness moments – what life is really made up of. Although our big happiness moments are pretty awesome too. 

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The roar of a Sunday crowd 

We were fortunate enough to have tickets to the rodeo finals this afternoon at the Stampede. I haven’t been to a rodeo in ages, the Stampede rodeo in longer, and possibly never to the finals (or I was a little kid and can’t remember – we used to go a lot when I was younger).

Going as an adult and as a parent was totally different, and here’s my take on it….. I loved it. I thought I would enjoy it, but even I was amazed at how totally into it I got. I was just kind of enthusiastic until the barrel racing started and then if I could have gone down to the track and raced myself I would have. I think I’ve found what I want to be when I grow up. A barrel racer. All the excitement of show jumping but without the jumps. I was enthralled. I turned into a screaming lunatic and it lasted the rest of the afternoon. It was so much fun. 

My happiness moment: cheering loudly as they raced around the barrels.  

I looked over to see how Jacob was enjoying himself and was delighted to see this:

  

Sitting with his uncle whom he adores and admires. As a huge bonus, my uncle knows all things rodeo and Stampede and is a great person for Jacob to learn from. It was a happy moment. 

I also had a moment of awareness – again – I have this one  every so often but I was reminded of it again while we were walking the midway. I have a female cousin who is a rancher, a cowgirl, and a lady. Watching the dignified way she walks through the crowd while dressed up on her fancy western gear is inspiring. She is truly the definition of a lady rancher. She shows how classy and respectable one can and should look while dressed in western attire. She is an admirable example to all of us of the grace and self respect we should all have as women. I am proud to call her cousin. 

It was a day filled with big happiness moments and I will treasure them for a long time. It was fun to spend the day with family and it was important to be reminded of our heritage and our roots, it was good for the kids to have that deeper sense of where they come from. 

Yahoo!! 

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Chucks and the Grandstand Show

 Today was a big happiness moment. My uncle treated my Mom and I to the grandstand show at the Stampede tonight. 

We did the fun family tradition of betting on the chuckwagons – I actually did better than I thought I would have. 

Out family has a long history with the Stampede and it was wonderful to get to be a part of that. And now since it it 1am I am happily off to bed so I can wake up early and take my kids to the grounds tomorrow. Happiness 

 

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Wind up party 

The monsters finished their week of VBS. I have to say I’m exhausted and all I did was drive back and forth. We have been on summer time for two weeks now and I feel like I haven’t even had a chance to catch my breath. Family parties, summer sunshine until 11pm, stampede week – it’s busy here.  Good busy though. So nice to be not lonely all the time. 

Happiness moment was sitting at Cochrane Ranche tonight with my mom while the kids ran around with friends at the VBS wind up party. Nice to see them settling in and making their own tribe of friends. So important to have a place where you can grow roots. 

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