I feel like in the last three years God has just kicked the shit out of my life. All the earthly foundations I had come to depend upon have been shattered with the deaths of my parents and a financially ruining divorce. But you know, maybe I needed my foundation to be destroyed so that I could build a new life from the ground up.
The thing about starting from 0 means that I get to recreate my life. I get to stop and think about who I really want to be for this next part of my life.
My experiences with my parents really helped me understand I need to strengthen my spiritual connection and that has become my mission.
I’m discovering that while most of the pain inflicted on me and the kids wasn’t my fault (and for a long time I believed him when he said it was), it’s my responsibility to heal from it. That has totally changed my perspective on things.
It helps me step out of being a victim, and into a role where I can actually make a change – not only for me but for the kids too.
I can’t change him, I don’t want to, and I don’t have to. But I have to change myself. I have to keep working at living from love instead of living from fear.