happiness

What are you thinking

In my riding lesson today my instructor was trying to explain to me how to keep my hands at the right angle and height, my toes in, my legs bow legged, my lower leg on, and remember to stay on at the same time.

I said I had a hard time multi tasking and if I thought about my hands then my leg went to Shit, and vice versa.

She told me to simplify things in my mind, to just make it all a pattern I followed.

I then had the best ride I’ve had so far. Everything came together and he was round and on the bit and happy.

After she asked me what I was thinking that made it so different.

I said I wasn’t thinking at all.

She responded by rolling her eyes and saying she wasn’t going to ask me questions anymore.

I clarified and said, well what I did was clear my head. I stopped thinking and just started feeling.

She jumped up and down and said yes that’s it exactly.

Life is so much simpler when I feel instead of think.

On another note, I was included in a group photo share of a picture of my son that I had shared on here. A big reason why I didn’t blog last year was because my kids wanted the window to their lives closed to Mr X and his family. Lesson learned. I will no longer include photos of the kids on this blog and I will concentrate on my own personal happiness and growth. It’s a challenge since my kids are one of my greatest sources of joy, but honoring their wishes comes first. Relationships take work and time and commitment. You don’t get to bail on that and watch how their lives are going through my window. Not anymore.

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