Tag Archives: love

happiness

Birth sister/soul sister

Today was a day that had a lot of anxiety attached to it right from the start. It’s so frustrating to get anxious about things that we can’t change, but sometimes that happens, sometimes (always) things are out of our control, sometimes life is scary.

However as I started this day, I was walking across our yard and noticed the beautiful full moon hanging over the mountains, barely visible through the trees. I love Alberta – I love it much more now that it’s not -50C, but it’s home, and it’s where my people are.

I had a really good quiet moment with my sister this morning. Both our lives are busy and even when we are together usually there’s kids and chaos – which is all good but sometimes it’s important to stop and really check in with each other, and I feel like we did that today. It was much needed and appreciated.

This evening I did much the same thing with my soul sister. We shared supper and stories, laughs and heartaches – she has been a huge support for me through my divorce and all the fallout from that and I’m forever grateful.

I feel like we have created a culture where independence is celebrated – where needing someone is a sign of weakness and we are supposed to be brave and strong all alone all the time. It’s not how I can function. I need my tribe, I wouldn’t have been able to pick myself up and be building a new life for the kids and I if I didn’t have the unconditional love and support from my people. That is happiness.

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Frozen In

Yesterday with the windchill it was -48C which is an absolutely unbearable temperature. So much so that my car decided it was done with being an Albertan and died (well the battery died). My very kind brother in law tried to help me out yesterday to no avail and a second attempt by me and my son today achieved the same results. I put in calls to AMA and also to Volvo On Call to come rescue my poor car. AMA said it was still a 16 hour wait and the other said about 12 – this is what happens when it’s so cold and also the holidays.

There’s something kind of nice about being forced to stay home. Life gets so busy and I usually put on at least 100km/day which makes for a lot of driving and a lot of time on the road.

Today I got to spend cleaning the house a bit, visiting with the kids, and setting intentions for the next year. As a bonus, only a few hours after I called Volvo sent out Big Hill Towing from Cochrane and they rescued me by starting my car.

2018 – Our year for peace and happiness.

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Big moments in small moments

The boy came with me today to do some errands. There was nothing special or exciting about the trip to town except for the fact that my 16 year old willingly spent the day with me.

But the big moment came wrapped inside the small moment when on the way home he quietly said thank you for all you do to make our lives better. I can’t imagine where we would be without you.

Those words wiped out so much of the mom-doubt I’d been carrying. It’s really the most important part of who I am – their mom.

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The best day of the year

Boxing Day has long been my favorite day of the year. It’s usually a day where we have the leftover fun of Christmas without the stress.

So we stayed in our pjs until lunch, went tobogganing, visited with some very dear friends, ate leftovers, and generally did as little as possible. It was a success. It was happiness.

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Finding the magic

Christmas at the ranch has always been a magical day for me. The traditions that I enjoyed as a child are the same ones I enjoy sharing with my kids now and I consider myself so fortunate that we have had generations of giggles in the same yard doing the same things with the same people.

This morning I wasn’t feeling overly Christmasy – it’s been a weird year, a weird start to Christmas, and I was just feeling weird in general.  I had this sad feeling that I was going to miss the magic of Christmas this year.

After lunch I had a little nap (which, let’s face it makes everything better always) and the kids came and announced it was time to toboggan with their cousins. It was -25 with the windchill, but out we went.

And the magic came back. One of our traditions is having crazy toboggan fun, freezing, laughing, getting covered in snow, and getting out and doing that changed everything.

The magic stayed for the rest of the day. It was there as I went out and played with my pony. It shone through as one of my cousins stopped by with Grandma’s special sauce for us to enjoy with our dessert – I had decided not to make it this year and it felt weird going without so it certainly enhanced the meal.

This year we were truly blessed. This year because of a few different circumstances we had the opportunity to make sure the focus of Christmas was on our family and loved ones, not on the things we received. I think through my faith, walking this spiritual journey, it is becoming more and more clear that love is the answer to every question. Today we lived in love, and that is happiness.

Merry Christmas!!

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The sauce!! and the saucy kids!!

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The tree of memories

We decorated the tree at my mom’s house this evening. The boxes of decorations don’t match and don’t have order. What they do have is memories.

There are ornaments from my childhood, from vacations, from crafting nights with family, and from the kids’ childhoods.

As we hung them up we shared memories and stories about some of our favorites. When the tree was done the boy looked at and called it the tree of memories And it is. All those ornaments hold memories of times with loved ones. That’s happiness.

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