Tag Archives: single mom

happiness

Buzz off

Years ago the kids and I saw Pinkalicious the musical when we were living in Roanoke. I think the kids were 7 and 11. It was a long time ago.

It was the cheesiest musical, but for some dorky reason we were all really into it, and we still sing one of the songs on a regular basis

Tonight the boy and I looked that song – Buzz Off – on YouTube and laughed until we cried.

https://youtu.be/SUHdoTktTA8

It’s a good reminder that the small moments become big memories. We have carried the laughter and fun from that evening for almost 7 years.

Life happens in the small moments

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happiness

Out hometown

More and more the kids are expressing how at home they feel here. They’ve said that previously they always felt like there was no point in putting down roots since they knew we were always moving.

But now, here, in cochrane, they’ve built their own tribe. They’ve got the family one they were lucky enough to be born into, and my lifelong friends, but they’re making their own circle as well.

The girl said today on her way to a party how she now feels like no matter where life takes her she’s got a home here.

Thank goodness for that. We have been seeking grounding and stability for most (all) of their lives. Funny how we had to return to what we left to find it.

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happiness

More goodbyes

Today my beautiful Drishti went to his new home. It’s sad, I’m heartbroken, but it is so much better for him. He’s found himself a home with an owner who is a much better fit for him. I think that’s one of the hardest things about loving – is knowing we don’t own those we love. If they’re better somewhere else or with someone else the most loving thing we can do is let them go.

And so I did.

And it will be so much better for him, and it will be better for me too. We both deserve to be with a partner who is a better match for us.

It sucks – he was a dream I’d had for a long time – hence the name Drishti. But to be honest, over the last year and a half with all the loss and change in my own life my drishti – my focus – has changed as well. And I need to honour that. I’ll get another horse but it won’t be right away.

The most Canadian way possible to load a horse. With the aid of a hockey stick.

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happiness

Father Brown

The boy was having an I miss nana day today. This time last year she was so sick and so much happened we all haven’t had time to really process her death.

So he decided to spend the afternoon binge watching Father Brown – which was one of their shows.

That kid really loved his nana. Almost every day he would go over and visit her. Sometimes for a few minutes, but often they would spend hours together – talking, having tea, watching tv.

It’s a special relationship kids have with their grandparents. One of my most important relationships was with my own grandma so I know how they feel and how great the loss of their grandparents is.

But, there are these memories, these special ways of celebrating and remembering the love that was shared. Thank goodness for that.

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happiness

Explain yourself

I was telling the kids today how someone close to me had spent a lot of time trying to explain their actions – maybe justify their actions is a better way to put it. The boy looked at me and said

You should never have to explain your actions to someone else. If you’re doing the right thing – there’s never any explanation for your actions needed. Look at Grandpa – he never had to explain or justify what he did or who he was – he lived with integrity and you never had to doubt that what he said and what he did was the right thing.

I was so proud of my kid for picking up on that and understanding what it means to live by your word. I’m so grateful that my kids had my dad as a role model for as long as they did.

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The power of friends

I spent some time today reconnecting with some girlfriends. We all get busy and have responsibilities and other priorities, but there’s nothing like good friends to make a soul smile.

I’m continuously grateful that we are home and I have my lifelong tribe around me again. It was good for me to learn how to make friends during our gypsy years, but man am I happy we are back where we belong.

Sometimes we need people to help hold us up, sometimes we need to be the ones doing that for others. But however it’s going, we need people we can count on in our lives.

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Historical preservation day

We set up at our community hall this morning and began our project of collecting community photos.

I had so much fun hearing some of the people come in and share old stories and memories of the hall and early ranch life out here. My cousin and I spent hours looking through old pictures and sharing our own thoughts about how our family has grown and who we are.

I’m so grateful I was able to be part of this process.

Even found an old wedding photo of my parents from 1967 in an old box

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happiness

Chair wars

The boy and I had some personal wellness time today as we tried out chairs at our Staples. We actually did need a chair, but the staff there were very understanding with our untraditional method of testing chairs.

I actually want to get one of the chairs but I’ll wait for it to go on sale.

Today is my dad’s birthday and I was feeling kind of sad and missing him. This was the perfect distraction and we both really needed the laughs.

That kid cracks me up.

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happiness

Pink

For the last week or so I’ve been on a huge Pink kick. I kind of forgot how much I like her music, but I downloaded a playlist on Spotify and it’s all we’ve been listening to – in the house, in the car, in our heads. I feel like she wrote the soundtrack to my life.

Today as we were driving to Calgary we played Trouble as loudly as the car speakers would let us and garnered some rather curious stares from the other cars as we went down the highway singing and car dancing and laughing.

I swear that woman is the best cure for sadness.

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