Tag Archives: health

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The gift of health

One of my daily affirmations (when I remember, I’ve been lax lately) is that I’m grateful that the gift of health is keeping me alive. It’s amazing how even though I live with the intention of being grateful for my health, I don’t fully appreciate it until it’s not there. 

These past two weeks I’ve been knocked to my knees with a brutal cold. I’ve been coughing and using Kleenex nonstop. On top of feeling terrible, it’s been gross. 

It made me stop and really reassess my health. What can I be doing to look after myself better?

Since beginning my studies in Ayurveda my self-care has increased exponentially, but there’s always room for improvement. After moving back home last spring, I dove face first into a big piece of cake to soothe my sad feelings and it’s taken me a long time to crawl back out of that sugar hole. 

I’ve been eating too much sugar, and sugar makes me feel like crap. Correction, in the moment it makes me feel soothed, happy, safe, and loved. Not long after that it makes me feel like crap. My muscles are more tense, I’m more anxious, I don’t sleep as well… the list goes on. And yet sugar… it calls my name and it’s hard for me not to come running. 

Aside from that, I was grateful for the things I’ve learned over the years that help me get back to health. Allowing myself to stop and rest (this is a big one), honey and ginger, apple cider vinegar, rest, rest, honouring the fact that this is where my body is at right now. 

Today I feel closer to my healthy self than I have in two and a half long weeks. I’m certainly well enough to know I’m feeling better and to feel immense gratitude for my increasing health. 

Today’s  happiness moment is the joy of appreciating how well my body looks after me and how much better I feel as I return to a state of balance and health. 

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Bad to the bone

Years ago, in my early twenties, I had what came to be remembered as the summer of fun. It was the first year ever that I wasn’t showing my horse. Had I known it marked the end of my competitive riding it may not have been the summer of fun, but I didn’t know that at the time. I was young and single and had a good friend who was also young and single and fun. We spent the summer camping all over Alberta and British Columbia. On a whim we would pack up our tent and our dogs and take off for parts unknown in search of adventure. 

Near the end of the summer we added some other friends to our posse and went house boating on the Shuswap. Our boat had those wonderfully loud speakers to blast music and our theme song quickly became Bad To The Bone by George Thorogood. Whenever it was time for us to drive the boat, go swimming, or pretty much whenever we needed to be heard we would blast out the beginning of that song. 

To me those guitar riffs that start off that song hold memories of fun, sun, smiles, friends, and self confidence. It was a time in my life when I was happy with who I was and had confidence in who I was becoming. 

This morning as I sang loudly and badly to Bad to the Bone on my morning run I thought how easier life would have been had I not been broken. How differently would my energy have been used had I not had to spend it fixing myself? The good thing is that like many breaks I am healing into a stronger version of who I was. And maybe that’s what I needed to do. 

I’m thankful I have the strength to keep reaching for better things. 

My happiness moment today is supervising my kids as they supervise my sister’s kids in the play zone at the mall. It’s fun watching the four of them run and play with each other. Cousin relationships are special and I’m thankful they have this opportunity to bond together.  

  

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Rebel Yell

I finished off Stampede Week by eating an entire bag of Those Little Donuts. I’m not kidding and I’m not proud of it (I’m a little proud actually). After serious testing over the years I can tell you that they’re the best mini donuts in the park – probably because they make them as you order them. And we ordered a lot last night. A bag for everyone and then it was fight to the death to hold onto yours. I lost one of my donuts to Jenna because I wasn’t paying  enough attention, but after that I held my bag closer. A very non-Ayurvedic meal, but a fun one nonetheless. 

But now that Stampde is over I need to get back to a better routine. Who am I kidding? I’ve been in a bad eating routine since we moved back. Better than it could have been, but I most certainly dealt with Dad’s illness and death by eating every piece of cake I could get my hands on. 

Now is the time to change that. I want to have lots of happy and healthy years ahead of me, and I know the best way to do that is to honour my body and soul. 

I haven’t gone out walking since Dad died – not because of Dad, but because of all the grizzly bears in the area. Anyone who tells you they’re all disappearing doesn’t live where I do, that’s for sure. On my walking path there was a mama and her triplets and then a few days later a male. I became bear-a-noid and did my working out on the elliptical at home. Fine, but not nearly as good for my body and soul. 

Today, bears be dammed, my Dotted Dog and I headed out for a walk/jog. I’m not a runner, but I’ve done the couch to 5K program a few times and liked/hated it. I don’t mind small runs when I’m in shape – no desire for long distance ones. I put some music on my phone – music from a time when I was younger and felt strong and powerful – and headed off. 

  
As I was jogging along singing loudly to Rebel Yell (which I knew would have the added benefit of scaring away any wildlife – unless they thought I was dying and therefore easy prey), I realized that was exactly what I am starting to do – finding my own rebel yell. Three years ago my body and soul were both broken. I had finally realized that unlike Sleeping Beauty, my Prince Charming was not going to rescue me and that I had better wake my own self up. And that I have. Sometimes I feel weak and not good enough, and then I remind myself of how far I’ve come. Three years ago I couldn’t walk across the room without being in unbearable pain. Now I run around, ride horses, garden, play with the kids, go walking, and do yoga – all impossible things three years ago. Thank goodness I decided to become my own hero. In doing that I also showed the kids they can become their own heros too. 

I think this building a better me is part of why I love living in this old house we live in so much. I can relate to this place. This house has been neglected and was empty, but it is deeply loved by the entire (extended) family. We are pouring life and love back into it. Good things come from this house. 

My happiness moment was Jacob lying with his huge teenage body on the couch. He looked at me as I walked by and said mom, please don’t tickle me. Which of course meant I sat right on top of him pinning him down and counted all his ribs. When he laughs like that he’s just like little Jacob of his younger days. The dog got so upset that he was getting all the attention she jumped on top of him as well – which worked out for me as I was able to tickle him better. Small happiness moments – what life is really made up of. Although our big happiness moments are pretty awesome too. 

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Peace in the midst of the storm. 

Today was one of those days where I am so grateful that I am actively searching for moments of happiness. It has been an emotional day. A bed opened at the hospice and Dad left the ranch to be cared for by the loving staff there. It’s a beautiful place, it’s where he wanted to go, it’s better for his care, and yet… my heart still wants him at home. 

When he left it was the perfect send off from his favourite season from his yard where he has spent so many moments of his life. His tree was in full blossom, there was no wind, the birds were chirping – it was a beautiful moment. Except for… 

Thank goodness for the moments of happiness. A farmers market was on just down the street. We went and got food, we strolled around, it was sunny and everything was blooming. We went to the park. Things got silly. 

 
Man I love that kid. Normal happiness in the midst of a super emotional day. Peace in the midst of the storm.  

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The tribe

  
The thing I’m noticing about being in this current state of crisis is the overwhelming feeling like we are the only people in the entire world this is happening to (we are not). 

It’s a tempting way of thinking though. However, no matter how important I am in the story of my own life, there are so many other life stories unfolding that are just as important.  

But I’m the only one. 

Having a crisis gives me options. I can isolate into that bubble of feeling that this is a unique situation and live and breathe the crisis (tempting and inevitable sometimes). Or, I can look around and see what this situation is bringing me. 

Looking around has made me discover an inner strength that is deeper than I knew. I have discovered I have a much stronger and profound faith system than I was aware of. I have a lot more confidence in me than I thought. 

It has made me more aware of my tribe. 

I have always known my immediate tribe is made of intensely strong and brave people, but I have a new appreciation for just how strong, brave, spiritual, and lovingly kind they are. I have a new respect for how that tribe sticks together and cares for each other – leaving no one behind. No. Matter. What. 

I have discovered there is also this new crisis tribe. The people I meet in the elevators at the hospital who are there in their own crisis. The family members I meet in the waiting rooms in their own kinds of crisis. The kindness and compassion that radiates in these rooms is absolutely amazing. Finally, the people who have dedicated their lives to helping those in the crisis. The helping hand they stick out is invaluable. 

Watching these other people has made me really understand and appreciate the importance of the tribe. Most people have someone with them. Some of these people you can tell have someone who loves them immensely with them   Some of those people have a few someones who love them immensely with them. 

Some of them have no tribe at all. Nobody should have to face a crisis with no tribe at all. Thank goodness for the extended crisis tribe.  

A few have negative tribe.  Like the prisoner I watched walk shackled and escorted by two armed guards to his treatment. Whatever he did, it must be terrible to not have a caring tribe. 

Having someone try and push you down when you need a hand up. Negative tribe 

I am so thankful for my tribe   It’s big. There are members close by and there are members scattered. And I’m thankful for all of them. 

Happiness moment today was sending Jacob off for his first school camp. He was both nervous and excited. I hope he has laughter memories he remembers forever. 

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Super Grover

 

 Some days the happiness moments are harder to find. That is one of the reasons I do this blog. It keeps me searching for moments of sunshine during cloudy days. 

Today was a cloudy day. 

The moment of happiness came in the form of Super Grover. While we were at the hospital my sister and I decided to go visit my cousin who is in after being bucked off his horse. 

We picked out (manly) flowers and as we were standing in line, my sister leaned into a bin and pulled out a stuffed Super Grover saying and we will get this for him too. It will remind him that the next time he falls he needs to pull out his cape. Then we giggled and thought of Grover screaming and flying through the sky, arms flailing. The great thing is that our cousin loved it too – and totally got the humour. 

A moment of happiness brought to me today by loveable, furry old Grover. 

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A little Ayurvedic magic

 
First of all the happiness moment of the day. It was a beautiful, sunny 20 degrees Celsius out today and the kids and I took an early summer break and went to our old favourite, Mackay’s  Ice Cream in Cochrane. It was lovely and delicious. I had a very non Ayurvedic scoop of chocolate fudge chunk and blissfully enjoyed every bite in an Ayurvedic approved manner of mindful eating. OMG it was good!!

This weekend Jenna has been complaining on and off of a sore ear. Yesterday I pulled out my essential oils and tried putting some of them around her ear. While it helped a little nothing was solving the pain. 

This morning she woke up in terrible pain and I actually ended up keeping her home from school. As I was preparing breakfast I remembered where  I had stashed my mustard oil and decided to give a remedy a try that I’d been given by a friend from India a few years ago. 

At one point both Jenna and I had sore ears. I put her on antibiotics and I used the Ayurvedic remedy to see who healed faster. I did at a significant rate. 

So, you get a pot and put some mustard oil in it. Then add a couple of cloves of garlic and heat it until the garlic turns red. Remember it’s oil so hot is hot! I put a clear lid on the pot. 

When it’s done, let it cool and then put some on a cotton ball and place it in the ear. Leave it for as long as possible. 

Jenna wore hers for 3 hours and her ear is completely pain free. She went from not wanting to move to skipping down the road smiling and laughing. 

Magic

I love learning about and healing with Ayurveda 

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When life gives you lemons…. Eat lemon cake 

Today was a day that in many ways felt like life really had handed me lemons. This afternoon while  I was at the grocery store thinking about my lemon day, I looked down and there was this lemon cake. I figured what the heck, when life hands me lemons darn it I’m going to eat lemon cake. It was delicious by the way. 

   

I have sometimes wondered how my exit from this world will be. I hope at the very least it’s somewhat dignified. It probably won’t be. But one can hope. 

Today when I was driving my kids home from school I had a little preview of what that could be like. Trust me it was not dignified at all.

We were driving on the highway following some other cars when suddenly a very large gravel truck with an extra trailer pulled out from a side road and started making a left hand turn across the two lane highway and in front of us   

I was doing 100 km/hour and suddenly there was a monster of a truck just a few feet away from us and moving in our direction. I hit the brakes and the horn as we skidded/flew across our lane and onto the shoulder I screamed FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU – well you know the rest – as loudly as I could. Either the horn or my swearing caught the attention of the truck driver and he stopped – blocking all oncoming traffic. Thank goodness no one was coming right at the moment. We were somewhere between 2-4 feet from the front of the truck when he stopped. 

So while my motto has always kind of been this:

 
Apparently it’s more likely that I will slide in screaming the F bomb. My poor children.  

I took away several things from this moment. 

1. My guardian angel works hard and probably falls into bed exhausted at night. 

2. My life has been saved several times by my being behind the wheel of a Volvo. 

3. I should always take backroads. 

4. Sometimes when life seems to be all lemony it’s not really so much so. That living in the moment thing. Sometimes the moments are good and sometimes they’re not so good. But they are moments and there is something to be gained from each one of them.  

My happiness moment today was that I got to spend most of the day with my parents and my sister. While it was a day that seemed to want to hand us lemons we did our best to make lemon cake. In fact we ate that lemon cake together tonight before my sister headed back home. 

Happiness is those small moments with the people you love. 

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No test zone

Two happiness moments for the day

My dad is home from the hospital. So wonderful to have him back where he belongs. Home is more complete now. 

Went into AMA to see what I needed to do to switch my licence from Virginia to Alberta. When we moved to the states I had to take both the written and driving test. Nightmare. I’ve need driving legally for 30 years. I was terrified at the thought of having to do that yet again. Well, I don’t have to do the test again. Just fill out some paperwork. Happy and relieved. 

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Snow Day!

We are totally and completely snowed in. We have probably a foot and a half on the ground now, and they expect the greatest amount to fall between now and midnight. Which means by tomorrow we will have a total winter wonderland outside.

I mistakenly thought that once we moved to the South I was leaving winter behind, but apparently I was wrong. What amazes me is how much the kids love the snow. As soon as it started coming down they both dressed up and ran outside to catch snowflakes on their tongues, play with the ice and run around like maniacs. They were even excited both times that I suggested we go out and shovel the driveway (good old Jacob even went next door and helped the neighbours do their driveway).

They are loving being snowed in and having time to just relax. Actually, today was a much needed break after all of us were so stressed after yesterday. Jacob and I even had naps. I had to have a nap since he came in and bounced on my bed at 5:00am to let me know there was no school (I knew this the night before but hadn’t told him – well I paid the price for that), and Jacob crashed this afternoon – it took all of my strength not to go in and jump on his bed and wake him up *just because*.

My happiness moment for day 22 of the 44 came to me  while we were outside shoveling. First of all, I was happy simply because we were all outside enjoying each other, the kids were having fun shoveling (I was discovering that I have control issues with how I think it needs to be done which the kids found even funnier). I firmly believe that life is lived in the small moments and being able to live the small moments with them is one of the great joys of my life. The other was a huge feeling of happy gratitude. I’ve spent so many years being so run down and trying so hard to build myself up (with the forcing more then the allowing) and finally this year I was able to be outside and play and have fun and have the energy (physically and spiritually) to enjoy being in that moment.

Happy, blissful, peaceful, snow day xoxo

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