Happiness is being invited to Jenna’s lunch at school and seeing her giggle and have fun with her group of girls. I love how happy she is.
Sometimes I struggle with re,embering ti live in the present moment. Sometimes it seems like the present moment isn’t all that fun. But really, some joy can be found in every moment. I’m working in training my brain to live like the dog and cat. Happily focused on where they are right now. And if their food dish is full
This is my happiness moment for the day. Crocuses always remind me of springtime at the ranch. Which means family, calves, green coming back, long days, that gopher and crocus in the snow picture at my parents’ place, and the beginning of summer fun. It also reminds me of the flower book my dad put together with stories of all the wild flowers we grew up picking or looking at.
Today on my walk I saw actual leaves starting to pop on trees. I saw these crocuses growing in the garden of a friend of mine.
Spring. New beginnings. New life. New hope. Seasons change and we have to embrace the new and find love in happiness in every single minute. It’s the only way.
I’ve been scattered again today. I realized this because of my tea cups. It started when I made a cup of tea this morning and then dumped it and put it in the dishwasher (wahhhhh). I’ve found at least 3 half finished cups around the house from the day which means I’ve put them down and then completely forgotten them.
Thank goodness I didn’t have to do anything important today.
One of my favourite mantras I got from the side of my lululemon bag years ago DO ONE THING A DAY THAT SCARES YOU. I came across it when I was in the midst of my anxiety time and I held onto it. Sometimes the only thing I could do that day that scared me was get out of bed.
Doing things that scare you don’t have to be big things. Fears are relative to the person. Things that scare me may not scare you.
But sometimes life is just scary and that’s part of living life.
Because bad things can be scary – the boogeyman, finances, security. But good things can be scary – love is probably the scariest thing you can do. But imagine life without it.
Love fearlessly. It’s the only way.
My happiness moment was tonight at Jenna’s school. They had a civil war performance and it was so fun to get to see her up there.
My Canadian ignorance showed through. I thought Goober Peas was a kids song Burl Ives sang (I grew up listening to mom’s album. Also thought big rock candy mountain was a kids song. And yellow submarine for that matter). It was fun to watch her so fearless up on stage
I woke up feeling pretty out of sorts today. Stressed and anxious about things I can’t do anything about. Some of them really big deals some of them not, but either way not things I can change. And stressing and being anxious is not helpful in any circumstance.
So, I sat and meditated and then walked the dog. When I came home I was looking around the house feeling so overwhelmed. Somehow over the weekend we’d turned it into a disaster area, which for sure would mean that someone would want to come look at the place.
But then my cleaning fairy showed up. Today was the day my cleaning lady comes. I’ve hired her to come every two weeks and the difference in my life has been amazing. The amount of stress it has taken away is huge. Having that extra helping hand helps put balance back in my life. It helps with the overwhelmed feeling. It helps let those anxiety feelings go away.
It does not change those things that stress me out but it sure sets me up to deal with them better.
I’ve decided that any little thing that can be done to help make those things that stress me out go away is an absolute must in life. How much more enjoyable life is when I am able to let go of things that are overwhelming or create unnecessary stress. How much better it is to have helping hands come in and support, and how much better it is to be able to be a helping hand back to someone who needs it.
Because when you need help and there’s a community of loving hands there to help you it makes things so much better.
My happiness moment today was the feeling I had when my housecleaner left the house and it felt so good and clean and relaxing. But it spreads out into larger areas of my life. I’m so thankful for those people who are able to step in and give support and love and guidance when it’s needed, and I’m thankful I have people whom I love and can give support and love back to.
Then, as a reminder that He is in fact part of that community that gives love and support, God made the most amazing sunset tonight. The picture does not do it justice – Jacob and I had to pull off the road to take the picture. It was setting over the mountains and Jacob said it looked like a dancing dragon.
Even though it always starts as the most horrible thing I could do, the kids actually enjoy the forced family fun walk along the river. I haven’t made them do it very often in the winter because the cold and the whining together was more than I could handle. But, today was sunshiney and pretty out so we braved it. After the obligatory grumble, grumble, grumble they started playing catch and running around like…. well…. kids having fun.
I’m so glad we forced ourselves out of the house and enjoyed some of what Mother Nature has to offer.
Sometimes you end up being a bump on a log. She thought this was very funny.
And proof they can be normal.
It was so good for our souls. And so important to do. Because you have to enjoy that happiness in that moment. In every moment there is somehow, somewhere happiness to be found. But, some of them are more difficult to find the bliss in. So, for those – I like to have these extra moments of joy built up to draw strength on.
Here’s my true moment of happiness right here. There’s actually a video with a dance but since I love him I won’t share that. Happiness is being silly and goofy at just the right moment. (They’re light up shamrock glasses and he’s got shamrock socks to match – you just can’t tell because you’re blind from his shoes)
Today I played the role of “good mommy” and let Jacob ride shotgun in the suburban rented for the weekend. It’s black and mafia cool looking, but we have managed to turn it into a crazy family car nonetheless. Here’s what I discovered today – being in the back seat is much more fun than being in the front seat. For example, I could reach through the seat and the head rest and tickle the back of Jacob’s neck. I could reach around the side and poke him. Then when he got angry and tried to squish me to death by backing the front seat right down on me I could swing my legs to the side, grab his seatbelt pinning him to the seat and wet willy him until he cried uncle.
Jenna and I laughed so hard in the back seat we thought we were going to be sick.
We played push your seat back and then flop it forward. We harassed poor Jacob stuck in the front. We played the “are we there yet? I’m bored” game until their dad got that cranky line that says shhhh I’m trying to focus on the road across his forehead. Then we laughed about that.
We took crazy car selfies.
Being an active participant in fun is so much better than being a passive participant. It’s so much more heart warming to be able to be a part of the fun than to just watch and enjoy the fun. It does not mean you actively have to get up and do something. In fact when I’m laughing so hard I can’t get up and do anything. It just means being engaged and involved in the fun.
It was by far the happiness moment of the day. I felt lighter for hours after it.
Happiness rocks.
I had my 5th Healing Light Yoga Therapy class today. It was so powerful I don’t even know where to begin. I need some time to process it. But I can guarantee that it’s what set me up for the belly laughing, gut aching fun I had later on.
Nourish, Vitality, Excitement, Desire
Those are my new life-loving words.
Today I had an Ayurvedic consultation with Asrael from Ananda Ayurveda. She’s the same lady who teaches my Healing Light Yoga Therapy classes and it has been so uplifting for my soul to have had her come into my life.
~ As a side note, as soon as I got on my Google Hangout chat with her my cat Ella came running from the other side of the house to stick her head in the computer and see “the yoga lady”. Ella spends a lot of time hanging out with me during classes and I guess was excited to see what was going to happen today.~
It was amazing. I wish I’d done this sooner, but I’m thankful I did it now. It was good to know that a lot of the things I’ve been feeling about what’s going on with me were in fact steps in the right direction. To find out that what I’m learning and trying to apply is actually working was pretty heart warming.
Of course there is a lot I don’t know and so to have her start to fill in some of the blank spaces fills me with gratitude. It was so wonderful to have someone sit down and walk through where I’m at and how I’m doing physically, spiritually, and energetically. To have someone hold my hand and help guide me down the path that I feel like I’ve been walking blindfolded and trying to peek out the corners feels like a weight being lifted off my shoulders (and my lower back and hips).
I now have better ideas on how to ground and nourish my self. How to regain my center of balance and power up that strength.
Interestingly, one of the things she suggested I do is to start Morning Pages which I did years ago after going to a course led by Julia Cameron at Kripalu. I did them faithfully for about 2 years, when I loved doing them and when I hated doing them. Then as I really got into those dark night of the soul times I quit doing them because they made me angry and upset. Ironically had I kept doing them I probably could have worked a lot of that junk out because that is the point of having all those feelings in morning pages. But, I couldn’t deal with that then. So now here I am…. back to Morning Pages. Great…. (it is great. It will be a good thing, it just won’t always feel like a good thing)
That was my happiness moment. I highly recommend doing it if you are able. It’s a wonderful way to be able to discover more healthful ways to live life. And think…. soon I will be able to give guidance similar to this to other people! It’s life-changing!
My other, naughtier, yummier, less Ayurvedic happiness moment came later when we went out for supper and I had this big old piece of chocolate cake for dessert. Oh, yummmmmm!!!!
My happiness moment of the day was going to be that I got the purple highlights in my hair redone today. I first put them in late last fall and I LOVE them. They’re subtle enough that it doesn’t scream purple yet bright enough you can see the purple. Funky hair is fun.
But then I was taking a selfie to show off the purple and Jacob photo bombed me. We laughed. I told him to butt out.
So I took another one and he photo bombed me AGAIN. I love it when the kids are funny. It means they’re relaxed enough to joke around.
Here’s a front on.
Here’s a better purple view
You can’t even see them all that well. But they’re there. My hairdresser liked them so much she was going to do her hair after I left.
Purple power. I’ve got purple everywhere and will soon write about how purple fits into my coming out is the dark night of the soul.
I was talking with a friend this afternoon who is also thinking of selling her house. They’ve had a bunch of false starts over the past year about getting the house ready, having possible jobs fall through, having people want to buy the house and then back out… we can totally relate to each other’s unrest and uncertainty. We were chatting about it today and I said “I’m trying, I know it will work out, I’m strong on faith, just low on patience”. We laughed because – aren’t we all?
She said “It would be nice if God would just turn on the light at the end of the tunnel once in a while so we could see where we are going.”
I totally agreed. It does not even have to turn on and stay on, just one of those quick flickers so you can look around and get your bearings and know that everything’s going to be ok. Because it will be. One way or another.
It’s just the having patience part that is difficult.
Jacob got up early this morning and came and flopped on my bed while I sat in my chair drinking my tea and playing fetch with Ella. I told him that it didn’t seem all that long ago I could just pick him up and throw him down on the bed. My little-baby-who-is-now-a-man-with-deep-voice. I told him about how I’d throw him and then tickle him, until one day I threw him and then fell on top of him because I wasn’t strong enough to throw anymore.
He came and lay beside me in my chair, all stretched out looking so comfortable. I looked down at him and with fingers twitching said “Whey you were little Jacob I used to move my hands just like this and then come down and tickle you!!!” Which I then did. And he curled up in a little ball just like he used to when he was little Jacob and giggled and squirmed and didn’t want me to stop, just like little Jacob used to. It did my heart good to have that morning moment with my little boy, and he came to me later this afternoon and said “that was really fun with you this morning mom, it made me feel like a little kid again. We need to do that more often.”
My moment of happiness.
In Ayurveda chutneys are the appetizers of the meal. Which makes sense if you think about the word “appetizer” – something to increase appetite. Not a mini meal before you have your main meal. They help both improve digestion and the absorption of your food, and can be specialized to nurture the different doshas.
There are many different recipes for this chutney. I seem to always make it with just 4 ingredients: fresh cilantro, fresh mint, a hot pepper, and fresh squeezed lemon.
I used 2 bunches of cilantro and 2 small packages of mint. I can’t wait until they’re growing outside instead of me having to buy them.
pretty, pretty….
Wash all ingredients, make sure you just have mint leaves – take them off the stems – and put them in a blender. I used to use my Cuisinart food processor, but I found that the little green specks were impossible to get out of all the little nooks and crannies. So, I now use my blender. I have to cut up the cilantro and then add things bit by bit or it takes forever to blend up.
Once it’s all blended, put in a glass dish – enjoy!!
Today is day 44 of the 44 days of happiness. My happy moment came while I was driving kids from doing recycling to drop off a form at the library. Jacob was reading the form – it was for a teen night and so I had filled out his information – and he said “why did you put M as my grade?” Well, I had read it as gender, so I put M for male. But, since the three of us are huge Goldbergs fans I said “The M is for moron” (because that’s what the dad is always calling everyone – it’s how he says I love you). We started laughing so hard I had to pull the car over because I couldn’t see to drive (thankfully we were at a light). Those spontaneous belly laughs are what it’s all about!
I was thinking about my 44 days of happiness yesterday while I was out for my walk. This mini-journey has brought so much to my life. We have lived in such stress and chaos for so long that it was really easy to focus on that part of life. Which is a shame when there still are so many awesome things happening every minute. Finding one thing that made me happy every day has made me an overall happier person. I laugh more, I play more, I have more patience with the kids, I talk with friends more, I even lost some weight – clothes that haven’t fit for ages are fitting again. I’ve also been doing yoga much more regularly and that is so blissful for my body and soul. I’m 4 weeks into a 6 weeks course on Healing Light Yoga Therapy which is led by Asreal Zemenick. This session is about addictions and letting go of old beliefs and patterns, and man do I have some old beliefs and patterns that need to be let go. I hadn’t realized how addicting those ways of thinking could actually be. But learning to let go of what no longer serves me is life changing to say the least.
Overall I’d say that the 44 days of happiness has made me a better version of me.
I realized while walking that I was just starting to hit my stride with this whole happiness thing and that just ending it could very easily turn my focus back onto those things that cause me stress. And I don’t want to do that.
So, I have decided that in order for my 44th year to be a year of happiness, I need to continue to look for the happiness in every single day. Why not? I’ve had lots of years where the focus has been on stress and anxiety and unease (no wonder my Vata is all upset) – why not have a year of happiness? It goes along with my intention of the path of least resistance and obviously I’ve intended on keeping this going from its conception as is evident in my birthday post.
So, now that I’m 44 and 44 days old I can say that I’m thankful that this year is off to such a blessed start. I feel happier and more blissful than ever.
