Tag Archives: alberta

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I have a dream… I hope will come true…

  
I think Lava has captivated me as much as Inside Out did this year. I’m kind of obsessed with both. Inside Out has helped the kids and me process through so many mixed up emotions in the past few months. Some really heavy, sad, mad, glad, weird shit. It has given us the tools to talk about our emotions and feelings in a way that we didn’t have before. 

I’m so thankful this movie came out when it did. It was brought into our lives at the exact moment that we needed it. In fact, that entire time when I had no choice but to surrender and let go and let God the Law of  Attraction made some powerful changes in our lives. 

It’s out on video now so I can watch it to my heart’s content which makes me full of joy. 

I’ve been discovering some incredible ways to let go and shift out of my body some really crappy, hurt, sad, angry emotions that I’ve been keeping held in for too long. The further I move on the path of my journey of happiness, the more I’m finding that I’m attracting the right people and the right keys to let go of those things that no longer serve me.  I’m reaching for a better and happier life for all of us. 

My happiness moment today was walking through the parking lot with Jenna. The sun was shining down on us and it was a beautiful and warm fall afternoon here in Alberta. She snaked her arm around my back and pulled me in for a big arm squeeze. Then she looked up into my face with her big, innocent, loving eyes and said I love you mom. 

Things like that are the the little moments that string together to make for a happy life. I am blessed. 

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A thanksgiving jar full of gratitude 

We are finishing off our thanksgiving weekend in a blissful turkey and pumpkin pie coma. 

I am so happy that our first thanksgiving back, Jennas first one in Alberta, and our first one without Dad was such a raging success. There are holes in my heart from the sorrow of losing Dad, but I also feel like my heart grew four times bigger with joy, love, and happiness because we are able to spend time with our loved ones. 

Tonight’s part deux thanksgiving supper was another throw back to old times and was held at my aunt and uncle’s place. The only difference being this time I was seated at the adults table (usually I snag a seat at the kids table. It’s where all the fun happens). It worked well until the usual political discussion got heated, and then a couple of us vacated the room to make tea. It took a long time to make that tea. 

We laughed, we shared, we were together. It’s been a long time since we have had our family to be together like this with. Not a rushed visit, but a simple drive over to visit. Something to be thankful for. 

The entire day was one of focused gratitude. I woke up to this: 

  
Just in case there is ever any question as to whether or not I have things to be grateful for, the Universe gifted me with this breathtaking view from my home. 

I spent the day with my tribe, loving the fact that my kids are becoming such a comfortable part of this wonderful extended family we have. 

I finished the day with the kids and I starting a new thanksgiving tradition. We decided a few days ago that it would be a good thing this year to write down at least one thing we are thankful for and put it in a jar. We will keep the jar and add to it every year. That way we will have a record as time goes by of all the things we have brought as gratitude to thanksgiving. It was time to bring some new life to thanksgiving and we believe this will be an excellent way to do that. 

It was a big happiness day today. A whole day of gratitude and happiness. I am blessed. Happy thanksgiving everyone. 

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Family thanksgiving 

 For the first time since 2004 we are home in Alberta for thanksgiving. As if that in and of itself isn’t enough to be thankful for, today the kids and I drove with my cousins to another cousin’s house in rural south east Alberta. 

When I was a kid we used to have large family, cousin get togethers at either thanksgiving or Christmas and today was a throw back to those days. 

We ate  in the shop, which was the only place big enough to spread out the long tables for everyone to sit at. After we had eaten, and eaten, and then eaten some more; we headed outside for the traditional family baseball game. 

I have not participated in one of these games since I was a kid, but watching it reminded me of why I’m terrified of the ball. To say my family is competitive would be a huge understatement. We are competitive while still laughing lots and enjoying everyone’s company, but competitive nonetheless.   
This year I sat on the sidelines with two cousins and heckled the players. Laughed and heckled. It was perfect. 

IMy happiness moment lasted the entire as I visited and enjoyed time with my family, my tribe. I am thankful every single day that we are home. This is how I want my kids to remember their childhood – feeling safe and loved, held in the arms of their family. 

I had a bonus happiness moment when I felt an envelope be slipped into my pocket right before I left. One of my cousins wrote me a letter filled with her memories of my dad. She talked about how much he loved me and wanted to make sure my sister and I felt safe and loved and protected. It was probably one of the kindest things that has been gifted to me. And I’ve been given a lot of wonderful heart treasures to hold on to. We are very blessed and I am thankful for that all the time. 

Happy thanksgiving. 

 

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In all His glory

I was lying in bed reading Wayne Dyer’s book Getting in the Gap and learning about finding those quiet moments with God through meditation. I had just put down the book, and was practicing The Lord’s Prayer with his meditation and finding the quiet gap between words when Mom called me. She said we needed to run outside and look nothing west fast before the sun went down. 

It’s like God heard me getting in that quiet space and connecting with Him and reminded me of all the glory He is capable of. This amazing beauty that is here for all the world to see. No matter where we are or how much money we have or what we think our personal value is, this beauty is here in the world for us. 

   
   
I’m blessed that I got to stand outside and share this peaceful and loving sky with my loved ones. Happiness. 

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Potato patch

This garden has been a great source of joy for us over the summer. I can’t believe the time has already come (and we are pushing it) to take the last veggies out to store for the winter. It does not seem like that long ago that Jacob and my brother in law planted while mom and dad supervised. And yet, it seems like a life time ago – because Dad was still here with us.   Next year we will be better at weeding… next year. Given all that was going on this year I’m still pretty happy we managed to grow anything. It never would have happened at all if my brother in law hadn’t given the gift of his time and energy to dig out the garden for us.

My happiness moment today was digging in the garden with my kids. It was great to come together for this chore that didn’t end up feeling very chore-like. I was impressed at how strong Jacob is – he can do such a better job than I can of digging down to find the potatoes. Listening to Jenna’s giggle every time she found a potato to put in the pile brought a smile to all of our faces. What a great day!

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Social Butterfly

A few years ago I was in Gaeta, Italy and I saw two older ladies walking down the street. They were arm in arm, swaying from side to side, laughing and talking and looking like kindred spirits. I remember stopping and staring at them and thinking I need to find a girlfriend like that. Within a day of seeing those ladies, I spent an afternoon floating in the Mediterranean with a cousin and we were laughing so hard we could barely stay afloat. It was one of those precious, kindred spirit moments.

Since that trip I have kept in mind that I need to surround myself with a good group of girlfriends, my tribe if you will.

For the past four plus years I have had no social life at all. It was a pretty lonely existence, and I used the time to strengthen my bonds with my kids and discover who I really am and what makes me tick (I used the silence to find myself). Now that I am home I’m finding my girlfriend tribe reappear and strengthen in ways I had been dreaming of. I am very fortunate in that I have a huge group of girl cousins, and they are the foundation of my girlfriend tribe.

Over the past few weeks I’ve noticed that the people I’m hanging out with are genuinely happy. I can see it when they smile, their smiles open up windows into their souls. I can see the happiness shine out of them, it’s lovely.  This past week I’ve had many chances to get together with old friends (and cousins), strengthening those girlfriend tribe bonds.

Today’s happiness moment was a two-parter. I went to the Calgary International Film Festival and watched a short animation film directed by my nephew (cousin’s son). He was supported by parents, grandparents, aunts, and cousins. That tribe. Later on I went out to a charity supper for STARS in Bragg Creek and spent the evening getting to know a second cousin and his wife a whole lot better. There were a bunch of happy people at my table and it was good to sit and laugh and enjoy being in the company of people who were joyful. The Law of Attraction, or your vibe attracts your tribe. It makes me believe that I’m on a happier and more positive vibe these days!

I believe I’m well on my way to creating the kind of life that will have me weaving arm in arm down a street laughing with a girlfriend in my old age. That is happiness, that is gratitude.

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Morning soul warmth. 

I need to add a happiness moment to my post from earlier today. 

As we were getting in the car to head to school this morning I looked east and saw this sight:

  
The sun rising over the hill while the cattle were grazing.  Every single second I count my blessings that not only are we home, but that we are home. Nestled right in the heart of our family, where our roots are planted, in the house where it all started, with views like this as a way to start the day. 

We are incredibly blessed and fortunate people. 

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The morning rush 

Simplify. Simplify. Simplify. Having been a fan of Thoreau for almost 30 years I have read those words over and over. Yet the actual concept of being  and living a more simple life is often one that I struggle with. 

I don’t want to be all high maintenance, yet I know I kind of am –  I like nice things. My body does not want to sleep on a wood palate, I like nice clothes and tasty food. I have purple streaks in my hair that take more time a month to get touched up than I care to admit. 

When we went to Waldon Pond a few years ago I had a better understanding of what Thoreau meant. Simplify was an easier concept when I stood in the beauty of that pond and saw what it was he looked at every day. And he didn’t live there in isolation either, he was constantly back in town visiting. Simplify and deprivation have very different meanings and I think I’d been confusing the two. 

Over the past few months the kids and I have learned how to simplify. We have gone from the big flashy house to the old in need of love house. We are now living in about a third the size of house, with a third the amount of stuff and on a much stricter budget. 

We have to be simpler. 

And here’s the interesting thing. We are all happier in the old in need of love house. I can see it in the kids’ smiles, in the way they run outside and yell at me to come see something that has caught their eye, as they’re running across the yard to play with cousins or to visit nana. A happiness that has come from simplifying our lives.  

I’m thinking that maybe simplifying does not mean giving up what I love and going without so much as it means figuring out what is really important and only keeping those things in my life. Getting rid of excess and clutter has lessened my anxiety and brought me back to balance and happiness. 

We turned onto the road today and I looked west. The moon was hovering so perfectly over the mountains we had to turn off into the neighbors’ driveway to look at it.   
Then as we went down into the valley, the sun was peering up from the other side. 

  And as we came out across the valley the moon showed itself to us one more time before we turned the corner and headed into a huge wall of fog coming up from the river. 

I said to the kids how lucky we were that what made us slow on our drive to town today was that we had to keep pulling off the road to admire the beauty of the morning. 

So many people started their day rushing and anxious and tired. We are so blessed that we started it in amazing nature of Creation. It blesses us, grounds us, nurtures us, and brings us incredible joy and happiness. My happiness moment today.  

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Harvest time 


The garden this year has been a very emotional space for me. It was planted with the supervision of mom and dad on Mother’s Day weekend by my sister’s family and the kids and I.

Gardening was something we always did with dad. He always had a plan as to what he wanted to grow and where. It was difficult to say the least this year, him planning out what he wanted planted and then hearing  him acknowledge that he wouldn’t be around to watch it grow.

It has brought us a lot of joy over the summer. The weeds got wayyyy beyond me, but the looks on the kids’ faces as they’d run out to the garden to grab a carrot or check for peas was one of the highlights of the summer.

Tomorrow it will be four months since dad moved forward on his journey. Enough time for the garden to grow and then to be harvested. I’ve done a lot of personal growth during this time as well,  and I have my dad to thank for pushing me to reach forward in my spiritual journey.

It has been a year with a lot of change and amazingly through all the heartaches there have been a lot of smiles. I know for a fact that I’m a better person now than I was at the beginning of this year. And I have a lot more compassion and a lot more faith in myself and in my strength.

My happiness moment was pulling carrots in the garden with Jenna, my mom, and my sister and her kids. I know dad was there enjoying it with us too.

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Jump into fall

I took a cold induced nap this afternoon. When I went to sleep it was rainy and gross, when I woke up it was warm and sunny. Welcome to Alberta.

After I rolled off the couch and assessed myself – coughing less, breathing easier, thankful for that  – I looked outside and saw some of the family up at my cousin’s trampoline.

I headed across the field and spent a wonderful chunk of time watching kids (and once my sister) bounce and flip and generally have a great time defying gravity.

I’m loving the beauty of fall this year. This is my favourite view on earth. The view from home.

My happiness moment. Standing outside watching our kids – cousins- spending time together. We are so blessed that they are getting the chance now to grow up knowing each other. Standing in the beauty of the place I love so much. Happiness really does begin at home.

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