A day filled with happiness moments. What a treasure she is.
We celebrated her day with a huge fondue pig out at the Grizzly House in Banff and then home for Crave Cupcakes (those are addictive. Thank goodness for the mini sizes!)
A bonus happiness was being able to celebrate her with so many loved ones.
This morning I posted a poem and some photos celebrating this beautiful ray of sunshine
When you smile I can see
how beautiful life is
The sweetness of your laughter
brings joy to everyone around you
You show the world your beautiful sparkle
and it makes light in the darkness
To think I was trusted to care for such a miracle,
What an incredible gift
There is nothing more beautiful than watching you
grow into the amazing human you were intended to be
My wish for you as you continue to grow
is that you always remember you are a perfect child of God
and that you are deeply loved
We finally pulled out the game I was given at Christmas this evening and had a family game night at my Mom’s house. It was a great happiness moment to sit around the kitchen table and laugh and enjoy each other’s company.
I feel so blessed that we are close enough to walk back and forth for visits and fun.
As a bonus happiness moment, as of 8pm when we took a break for the night from Monopoly, I am not bankrupt and I’ve only been in jail once! 
I come from a highly competitive family and winning is equal opportunity for children and adults alike.
Today my happiness moment was beating Jenna over and over at Connect 4. For the past month every single time we have played she has wiped the floor with me (and we play a lot).
I have to enjoy it because obviously she was just in a slump and I’m sure the next time we play I will not be winning.
Mostly I just love playing games with the kiddos. That important together bonding time is when I really get to know who they are.
Today’s happiness moment is kind of a weird one. It was a moment that was filled with laughter, yelling, frustration, a sense of accomplishment, and a little bit of chaos.
It’s supposed to snow tonight, and I think also get colder again (I’ve stopped looking at the weather, it’s depressing). We have been so lucky that it hasn’t been super cold for most of the winter. There are a lot of drafts in our old house and I’m slowly trying to figure out how to stop any more of the cold outside air from coming in than is absolutely necessary (barring buying new windows and doors which I know would help immensely). We have been trying to get a little creative.
I found some pretty good weather blocking curtains at Walmart (of all places!) and have slowly been purchasing and hanging them up over the windows. We decided to get a couple of longer ones and hang them over the doors to outside to attempt to stop the cold air from leaking in.
I am not a handy person. Home repairs, fixing things, putting things together – none of that is in my wheelhouse. I once spent an entire night with a friend building a bookcase from Ikea and that was the end of my do it yourself home repairs. But, we are learning in this house how to fix things. This old house and I have a lot in common and I love it dearly.
My happiness moment was putting up the curtains over the door this evening with the help of the kids. It wasn’t a particularly enjoyable experience some of the time, but we managed to get them hung. We had the power drill going, measured the height, and figured out how to fix things when everything went sideways. The three of us putting our brains and brawn together to finish the job left us all smiling and feeling like we all had more ability than we realized.
When I was a kid, Pony Club wasn’t for the faint of heart. You can tell just by the “high quality” of the trailers in the background of my photo that we were all a little more rough and tumble back then. I think that’s part of why those years were some of the best of my life. They weren’t always fun (sometimes they were downright terrifying), but they absolutely shaped me into the person that I am now.
I tended to be more timid as a child (a trait I still am working on to this day) and when the other kids were excited to race their ponies over the biggest and scariest jumps I was always at the back of the pack hoping something would happen so I wouldn’t have to do it. And yet, always so happy when I did.
Part of the reason for being afraid was that I was younger than a lot of the other kids, part of it was just my nature. However, those big kids seemed to follow the rule “leave no man behind ” (or blubbering child as the case may be) and there was no way I was going to be able to bypass any of the jumps out on the cross country course.
I remember sitting on my pony Snowflake, crying my eyes out because I was so scared, and my cousin (in the photo with me) racing by on her horse yelling to stop being such a coward and to get in and join them. Then, the next girl tearing by, whose last name was Coward yelling that they’d better find a better name to call me since she was going over the jump. Not wanting to look like a total wimp, and not wanting to get left behind I sucked up all the courage I had and raced after them. And of course, ended up having the time of my life.
Being able to find courage when facing a terrifying situation is something that has helped me immensely in my adult life. Not turning away from something I wanted to do, or being afraid to join the fun was also an important life lesson I learned.
I remember watching her flying around the cross country course, smiling from ear to ear, hanging on for dear life aboard her horse Monkey (well named considering how they were together) and knowing that soon my turn was coming. Just about everything I know about having to dig deep and then soar I learned with this girl out in these fields. 
You just never know where your path is going to take you in life, or how chapters are going to be written in your book. This incredibly strong, funny, amazing, brave, fierce woman has had most of her memories stolen from her by one of those cruel twists of fate. It’s horrible at any age, but she is just too young and too full of life.
I went to visit her today, for the first time in about a year and a half. I was touched to the core of my being that she remembered who I was, and thrilled that there is still some of her old spunk shining through her eyes. That spunk that propelled me through much of my childhood.
These memories are precious. They are ones that I will carry in my heart for the rest of my life.
My aunt picked me up to go in to town and visit my cousin (well really she’s a second cousin, and my mom and her dad are first cousins – but it’s all the same to me) I was touched that she would bring me in. I’m sure a lot of it was to make sure I wasn’t uncomfortable and that the visit went smoothly. We ended up having a wonderful visit. I also hadn’t seen her in a year and a half, and it had been many years gone by before that. We visited a little about old times, but mostly it was about things now – family, life in general, some about my cousin. We did a lot of laughing. Full out, head back, laughing. That was my happiness moment for the day, new memories and old memories all being stored in the heart.
There have been events over the past few years that have almost broken me. I have had people whom I trusted smile to my face and then turn around and attempt to break me without a second thought. At the worst of the worst I was just-about-broken.
Then I had a realization that I still had some choices. I could stay as I was or I could start reaching for a better and happier life. It’s been a long haul and some unpleasant and really sad bumps on the road, but I’m a much better and stronger version of myself. I believe along this journey that my kids have become better and happier versions as well. We certainly laugh a lot more.
I had someone break a trust with me recently, nothing too serious, but someone whom I put my faith into lied to me and that left me hurt, mad, and upset. Fortunately it’s not someone that I have to have any further contact with and I can take this as a life lesson and move on.
What it has left me with though, is an appreciation for how wonderful those people who are in my inner circle, in my tribe, are. I am surrounded by people whom I can trust and depend on. I have people to laugh with, people to cry with, and people to share my life with.
In the shadow of this one unpleasant experience I have had many other beautiful ones shine though. I spent New Years Eve at a community party and visited with a lot of extended family that I haven’t really had a chance to see since we moved back home. I was amazed at how they went out of their way to include me, drawing me out of my shy, social awkwardness to share stories and laughter.
There certainly are a lot of wonderful, beautiful people in the world. I’m blessed to be surrounded by so many of them. I may have been just-about-broken but now what I am is unbroken.
My happiness moment was driving Jacob home from school today. We were laughing and he was sharing things that had happened during his day. We came around the corner on the road to be astounded by the sunset. I had to pull over to get a better look and Jacob said mom, I can’t believe we live here. It’s so beautiful. We are so lucky. And I totally agree.
Whenever I see the sunset or the sunrise I am reminded that there is a strong, loving force out there looking after us. Being here and looking at these mountains will make me happy for the rest of my life.
Typically this weekend is a sad one. We are usually heading to the airport, crying, and saying goodbye to family. Sometimes we are lucky and a winter storm in Chicago or the East Coast cancels flights and we get to have an extra day or so. But, our hearts always know there is a sad goodbye coming.
This year we don’t have to go anywhere but down the road to our home. We have spent a lot of time this weekend talking about how nice it is to be here to stay and not have all that emotional upset of having to say goodbye to everyone.
I’ve been going over some blog posts from the beginning of this year and what really hits me is how brutally lonely we were back then. I am so grateful that we don’t have to be so alone anymore. Whatever other turmoil the past year brought us, I am thankful that we are back home.
We took the kids out for one last run on the sleds before we are back to the grind tomorrow. I think they had fun….
Hearing the laughter as they flew past me howling in joy was my happiness moment for the day. What a great start to the year. I have felt very held in love by those around us these past few days. It’s so easy to get caught up in negative thoughts, it has been very good to remember that there are loving, kind, fun people to share laughter and life with.
I have finally joined the cool kids club. Today we watched the new Star Wars movie at the Imax theatre.
I love Hans Solo, now I kind of want to watch old Indiana Jones movies as well (so perhaps it’s Harrison Ford I love).
It was a great happiness moment to share a movie from a series that played a huge role in my childhood with my cousin, as well as to share it with our kids who are perhaps the world’s greatest Star Wars fans.
I have been doing a lot of reflecting and had planned to do a post about all the changes that happened in 2015, and how I feel now heading into a new year. It really is a great time for a new beginning and a new and happier life.
However, the last 24 hours have been full of fun, laughter, sledding, visits, and eating. With very little time left over for sleeping – so forget about writing.
So I will just do my happiness moment for today and reflect later. Today it was driving the girls on their sleds while the boys stood in the snow and played with their light savers after having seek Star Wars for the second time.
Also, my cousin made Grandma’s Christmas sauce and I pigged out on it on top of some panettone. It was so delicious and so full of childhood memories.
I love this time of the year when we all make more time to visit and enjoy each other.
