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Sitting in the morning sun 🎶🎶

Today was a perfect Sunday day. It was warm and clear, the mountains were putting on a show, the birds were happily singing away in the yard – loud enough we could even hear them over the busy weekend highway traffic. 

I had a quiet moment to sit out there with my dad. 

 
We didn’t have to do anything. Just sat and looked west. My favourite view in the world. Sat and listened to the kids running and playing in the yard. It actually wasn’t all that windy. I think it was warm. I’m still adapting back to the Alberta climate. 

And then this happened 

  

Gotta watch out for that  lawn mowing teenager having too much fun driving up and down the yard. 

A quiet and simple moment of happiness. And yet sun a powerful one. 

Proof that life happens in the little moments. 

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Communion with family 

Today we were blessed with the gift of having the Eucharist brought out for us to share as a family. The minister, the temporary minister , and a very dear old friend of the family came out to share this spiritual ceremony with us. 

We were joined by my uncle, aunt, cousin (the recently-bucked-off-cousin), and his wife

It was incredibly spiritual and loving to be able to share this with a few of our tribe. There were special blessings and prayers for dad, there were also prayers said for the rest of the family. At the end I felt very strongly that we were held in the nest of love. 

I wasn’t sure how I was going to react, but since I hadn’t had my morning cry in the car, I  bawled my eyes out the entire time. Which is part of the new me who surrenders. 

Dad has always been a very strong guiding force on my spiritual journey. But he has been a much stronger guidance these last few years as we both have been actively seeking peace, spiritual fulfillment, and a stronger understanding of who we are and what our role in the world is. We have gone for countless walks together around the ranch – across the neighbor’s ridge – and shared our journeys with each other. His strong faith and his sharing his faith as he seeks his path have helped to shape me as I’m finding my path.

I consider it an incredible honour to have been able to participate in this ceremony that gives him guidance and love as he continues on his journey. 

My happiness moment was a walk with my sister this afternoon. We laughed, we cried, we shared memories of childhood. We appreciated our dad and how much he has given and continues to give to us. The strength and the kindness he has shown. The silent but constant and unconditional support he has shown as he stands firmly in our corner. 

We stopped and just appreciated the beauty of home   

 

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Recycling run

Today’s moment of happiness was a backroads drive with my dad to drop off the recycling. It wound us down the road that we used to drive when my sister and I were kids heading to Pony Club   Back when Pony Club was awesome and we were all crazy daredevils doing things that would never be allowed now.

Having the quiet time to enjoy the beautiful drive with my dad was a very special happiness moment. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky all day.

The view from the recycling drop off. Moose Mountain.   

On the way home the kids and I had to pull over at the last hill before the house. When God makes a perfect day like this it is important to stop and breathe in the beauty. What an amazing place we live in.  

Earlier today, after the morning drop off,  I was driving that same drive with that same view when KISS came on the radio. 🎶I want to rock and roll all night….  🎶. I turned it up and had this overwhelming urge to hit the gas pedal as hard as I could and fly the road (I didn’t).  
What this urge made me realize though was what I really wanted. When I was a kid my favourite way of letting go was to get on Pirate and fly across the field at a flat out gallop. This was a tricky thing to do as the gophers dug their holes everywhere waiting for us to fall in. I actually did fall with a different horse and broke my nose so I have some respect for them. 

But, one year the gas company came through and put a dirt road to one of their new wells. When they were done, there was a perfectly long stretch of field that had no holes in it. Pirate and I used to go out there and race up and down that dirt road until we were both satisfied. 

Racing in the wind like that is a truely freeing living in the moment activity. I couldn’t  focus on anything else. There were no troubles that could stay with me. There was nothing but me, my yellow ball of fiery pony, the wind, and God   

Just drop the reins, trust that all is well and run. 

The best cure for what ails me.

I think it’s time to go for a ride. 

Here’s the field Pirate and I used to run in. 

 

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Well, you can stick around… But I’m outta here!


My happiness moment of the day today is also the thing that consistently keeps me in balance. My walk. It’s supposed to be my daily walk but lately, for one reason or another, it hasn’t been every day. Some days I haven’t gone for a good reason and other days the reason has been too tired or too windy. Although in my defense, those Chinook winds can be brutal and my blood is still set to Virginia temperature.  

Today though was a wonderful walking day. The sun was warming my soul. The wind wasn’t bad. The mountains were beautiful. Things are slowly greening up. 

When we got back, Dottie bolted around the back of the house in hot persuit of something. I assumed it was the deer who stare in my windows at me every morning. But when I followed her, it was my parents’ cat Flower in his alter ego state of Killer   Not sure who should have been more afraid. 

This evening we were driving into town and we were talking about what superpower we would want. I wanted to be invisible so I could vanish when people annoyed me and  both kids wanted to fly so they could get away from annoying people (introverted family you think?). 

Then Jacob said you know how it is when you just get tired of being in a conversation and you want to leave but you can’t – so then your brain goes to your body “well, if you want to stay here that’s fine, but I’m outta here”.
That is the story of my life. I find myself in conversations I don’t want to be in anymore and my brain just walks out and leaves my body behind. 

I’ve been giggling about it all night. Love that kid. 

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Putting down roots 

To be rooted is perhaps the most important and least recognized need of the human soul. – Simone Weil 


My cousin put this quote on my Facebook wall yesterday saying it was something that reminded her of me. A lot of time over these past few years have been spent figuring out what grounds me and what to do about it. 

What grounds me? I rediscovered last summer that this grounds me 

  
I remember laughing about this fact years ago when I was riding all the time the only stable thing in my life is my horses. Over the years I’ve thought about that statement and refined it (I was in my early twenties at the time and if you’d told me I would be moving away from Calgary I wold have laughed hysterically)

Being home grounds me. Home in the larger word than just a house. Home where family is. Home at the ranch. Home where I look outside and see the barn. Home where I walk outside of my house and the first sound I hear is the gentle zerbert sound of a horse sneeze. Home where little Melissa ran around and played with her sister and cousins in the same yard her mom played and in the same yard her grandpa played. 

Like roots attaching into the ground I can feel myself grounding back in here. A different and more purposeful grounding than I had before when I took it for granted. 

This morning while driving home from the school drop off I had to pull over and take in the view of the mountains. It was breathtaking and I felt my soul smile as I stood outside of the car breathing in the morning air. As I stood there I thought about being grounded and being home and sticking my roots in. 

  
But then when I got back in the car the song Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond came on the radio and it brought me to Rhode Island summers. We had some beautiful summers there at the beach and driving to Newport and to Boston   That song is the song they play at the Red Sox games and Jacob became such a Red Sox fan there. 

I realized we had left roots everywhere we have been in some way, shape or form. 

One of the churches in Roanoke had this on their sign: bloom where you are planted and it became a mantra of sorts for me during my time there. I tried (perhaps too hard) to bloom and flourish no matter where I was. I have to say though, there are certain conditions that are absolutely better for growth than others. 

Learning about Ayurveda has taught me that a lot of my sense of being ungrounded is a Vata imbalance. I knew this, I studied this. I practiced a Vata pacifying lifestyle   And yet no matter what I did I remained unbalanced. 

Calgary physically is about the most Vata aggravating  place on the planet. It’s dry, windy, and cold, cold, cold. 

I knew that a lot of my imbalance had nothing to do with anything physical. I could live in a Vata pacifying place, eat Vata pacifying foods, and practice Vata pacifying routines and it wasn’t going to solve my problem. 

My issue was and is spiritual   And it’s being balanced in this most Vata aggravating of places. Where my roots are.  

Happiness moment: a little couch nap this afternoon with Ella the Cat being a purr machine on my chest. Part way through she rolled over, leaned down to where Dottie the Dotted Dog was lying, balled her paw into an unclawed fist and punched her a few times in the head. When Dottie looked up, Ella rolled over on her back and cuddled up to me so Dottie knew she was missing something. They pretend to hate each other but they actually have a pretty special friendship. Shhhh don’t tell anyone. 

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Party party 

Tonight we went to a big family birthday party. Thrown by a couple who really know how to throw a good party. Since childhood I’ve made it a point to try and weasel an invitation to one of their “hellabaloos” as he called it tonight. 

Good timing too because we really needed to get out and let our hair down and have some fun. I went with my parents and my kids and it was much needed fun and visiting. 

Every morning on our drive into school we pass a man driving a black truck heading the other way. We always wave and smile. In fact the kids and I judge how late we are by where we meet him on the road. 

Tonight at supper we were eating with my parents, my aunt and uncle and a few other people. One of them said I pass you when you’re out walking your dog during the day. I drive a black truck. So Jacob turned to him and said do we pass you on our way to school too? And he looked at me and said you drive the silver car through the hay valley?  We both decided now we will be giving big huge waves as we pass instead of little polite ones. 

I’ve told the kids that when they go out here they’ll always run into family. To find out this man is married to a cousin of my mom – their nana – just confirmed for them that they are home and constantly surrounded by family 

It was fun, it was important to be brought back into the loving arms of our clan. Today’s happiness moment. Out with my family with the family. 

Here’s the kids at the party:  
Don’t you love the cowboy light hat? 

 

Just to prove we live in the most beautiful place in the world this was the view towards our house on our way home. The pair of swans has decided to stick around for a while.   

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The daily commute 

It’s a double post today. This is the one I had planned before the after school incident took place. 

I was thinking today how awesomely lucky we are with our daily commute to school. This is the traffic jam I was in on my way to pick up the kids:   

And this is the view on the way home: 

    

It was so awesome that Jenna had to get out and do her holding the world in her hands picture 

 

Happiness drive. Happiness moment 

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Baby steps 

Today was an absolutely glorious spring day. I grabbed the dog and went for a sun worshiping walk along the road. It felt so amazing to have the warm sunbeams giving warmth and love to my soul. I met my cousin on the road and we had a whole conversation about how glorious the sun felt on our skin today. No wind made a world of difference. 

So nourishing. 

At the beginning of my walk I passed a newborn calf. (S)he is the one lying down beside her mom. I didn’t want to stay for too long and upset her, but it was such a glorious sight that I had to stop for a little while.  

  

On my way back I was lucky enough to see the calf get up for her (his?) first wobbly steps. New life. It was so amazing and exciting   It most certainly was my happiness moment of the day. 

   

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Herd of bears 

 Happiness moment of the day today was playing an impromptu game of songify on the road this afternoon with the kids. There’s nothing like singing loudly and badly in a car to make me happy. Especially with them. 

Funny moment today happened on the drive to school when I convinced the kids, albeit briefly, that there was a herd of bears up on the hill. 

They aren’t the exact same bears, but I saw some more in a herd while I was out waking today. Magnificent views I have. 

   

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The new kids….. Again

today was the kids’ first day at their new school. After a lifetime of coming back to Calgary to visit, today they started their new lives of actually living in Calgary. Which meant once again being the new kid. 

I don’t know who was more nervous – them or me. I had a really good feeling in my gut about this school. I was just hoping my gut was going to be right. 

We got up early and were sitting at the table having breakfast when suddenly Jacob started yelling the mountains are purple!!!!! So we rushed outside to look. We ended up staying out and taking the first day of school pictures 

This is from our yard. 

  

Here are the kids in front of the barn my grandpa built

  

It certainly was a glorious morning. 

 

After much anxiety I left the kids in very capable hands at the school. How lovely it was to be greeted by one of my sister’s oldest friends and then my cousin. New kids but not strangers. 

I picked them up after school and both of them were smiling an excitedly telling me how wonderful their day was. They both made friends   They both had fun. Jacob was ecstatic because they dissected a cow eyeball. He said that’s the best first day ever!!! Seeing the joy in their souls was my happiness moment for the da

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