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Like old times. 

Today I reconnected with a dear old friend (well, not old since she’s younger than I am and I’m still not old) and I got to join her while she did what it was that we used to do all the time  back in the day. 

That thing that makes my soul sing….. I watched her riding lesson.  
There’s a lot to be said for a friendship where we haven’t seen each other in probably 18 years and yet when we get together it’s still comfortable and easy. Aside from a lifetime of catching up, it was like no time had passed. 

I feel so blessed to be back here and able to pick up lost members of my tribe. I am closer all the time to being those old ladies laughing on the streets of Italy. 

The best thing about the old tribe I am reconnecting with is that I don’t have to pretend to be anyone but myself. They all have seen me at my best and my worst, and I have done the same for them. And yet, we still like each other. None of that judgement BS that happens so often. It just is. 

Happiness has always been just being in the company of a horse. Today’s happiness moment was extra special because I got to be with a friend and a horse. 

They say your thoughts create your reality, and I can tell that I truly am reaching for better thoughts because my reality is getting better and better. Because I am shifting my thoughts I’m creating a better and happier life. As a bonus of that. I’m creating a better and happier life for my kids. 

It’s great because when good things happen it makes me want to think even more happy thoughts. It’s a very conscious walk though. I often have the choice to be either happy or upset and stressed. And I have to keep making the right decision. I don’t always, but I’m getting better at it. 

As a bonus happiness moment, I am sitting in a movie theatre with Jenna, waiting for Hotel Transylvania to start. With our Scene points we got in for free, and I get to spend the evening with one of my favourite people.  

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anxiety, ayurveda, bliss, elephant journal, gratitude, happiness, home, joy, kids, law of attraction, tapping, wayne dyer

I made it myself.

When I first began this journey of happiness I wanted desperately for someone to take my hand and show me the path. I didn’t want to have to do this alone; but not only did I want someone with me, I wanted someone to save me and show me how to live a happier life. I wanted someone to do the work so that I didn’t have to dig deep into those dark areas of my soul and expose them so that I could clear them out.

That white knight never showed up, and I’m pretty sure if I had stayed waiting for him/her I would still be waiting at the end of my dark night of the soul. I would still be hoping things would get better, but not realizing the important role that I needed to play in my own happiness.

Because I didn’t have anyone around to guide me, and because I knew that I wanted to make steps towards a happier life, I realized that the only way to move up was to start climbing myself. It was really hard at first. Actually, for a long time it was brutally hard. Being isolated both in spirit and because I was in a place without anyone that I could talk to about things made it a very lonely time.

Fortunately, I decided that I could use that time of isolation to just shut down and work on myself. I had two goals, to look after myself and to look after the kids.  I worked on building a strong relationship with the kids – and I believe that was a success – we have a tight relationship that hopefully lasts us to the end of time. I knew that I needed to make myself a better version of myself in order to be the kind of friend that attracted people I wanted to hang with. So, I dug in and I worked on it.

My Ayurvedic studies have brought so many positive changes into my life. As a matter of fact, it has completely changed how I live my life and all for the better. Ayurveda led me to the readings of Wayne Dyer whose words calm my soul. I read his works every single day and it makes me feel so good inside. It has helped shift around a lot of old guck I’ve been holding. His writings led me to the Law of Attraction books which altered how I look at the world and how I think about things. I am a firm believer in that Law and I know that I’ve been attracting better and better things into my life.  A while ago I watched a video where Wayne Dyer was talking about tapping and that information has been tingling at the back of my mind for a while. Finally I decided to do some research into it and I’ve been experimenting with myself. It’s quite amazing and powerful and I’m excited to see where that leads me. I’ve felt a lot of things move in the short time I’ve been working with it.

I have found this blog to be so cathartic. It helps me to focus on things that make me happy and to celebrate them. When I first started blogging I had to look really hard for things that made me happy because I really wasn’t feeling it yet. I was still feeling hurt, lost, sad, and confused. Now I have things pop into my mind all the time will this be the happiness moment today?  Sometimes it is, sometimes not, but there are usually many things that make me happy throughout the day. I’m always amazed that anyone actually reads what I’m writing, and it brings me joy the number of people who have told me how much they enjoy reading it.

Today’s happiness moment is one in celebration of Jacob. Both kids have been so good about being the new kid time and time again as we have moved, but I know it’s hard. Jacob was sad last year because he started a new school here only to have to leave it and head to another new one this year. I told him that we lived in a small enough town that he’d still see his friends but I’m not sure he believed me. Tonight as we were getting gas he ran into a couple of friends from his school last year. He jumped out of the car and hung out with them while I filled up. I love that when we go into town now the kids always see someone they know. They already have a strong sense of belonging and we have only been home for 6 months. I suppose that’s because we are home.

It’s good to be home. It’s good to make our own happiness. It’s good to share that happiness with the world.

This photo is from Elephant Journal. If you haven’t checked them out i highly recommend that you do. They bring me inspiration daily. 

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I have a dream… I hope will come true…

  
I think Lava has captivated me as much as Inside Out did this year. I’m kind of obsessed with both. Inside Out has helped the kids and me process through so many mixed up emotions in the past few months. Some really heavy, sad, mad, glad, weird shit. It has given us the tools to talk about our emotions and feelings in a way that we didn’t have before. 

I’m so thankful this movie came out when it did. It was brought into our lives at the exact moment that we needed it. In fact, that entire time when I had no choice but to surrender and let go and let God the Law of  Attraction made some powerful changes in our lives. 

It’s out on video now so I can watch it to my heart’s content which makes me full of joy. 

I’ve been discovering some incredible ways to let go and shift out of my body some really crappy, hurt, sad, angry emotions that I’ve been keeping held in for too long. The further I move on the path of my journey of happiness, the more I’m finding that I’m attracting the right people and the right keys to let go of those things that no longer serve me.  I’m reaching for a better and happier life for all of us. 

My happiness moment today was walking through the parking lot with Jenna. The sun was shining down on us and it was a beautiful and warm fall afternoon here in Alberta. She snaked her arm around my back and pulled me in for a big arm squeeze. Then she looked up into my face with her big, innocent, loving eyes and said I love you mom. 

Things like that are the the little moments that string together to make for a happy life. I am blessed. 

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It’s in the smiles…

One way that I know that I’m happier now than I have been in a long time is the fact that I interact with more and more people who are smiling and happy. For the past few years it seems as though the majority of the people I encountered were stressed out, overwhelmed and unhappy and it had the effect of making me the same, which I radiated back and created more unpleasantness. As I’m getting happier and happier, I’m in the company of people who are the same.

This is not to say that there are not bumps and stresses in everyone’s lives. It has been a very difficult year for me in many ways, and yet I’m a happier person than I was a year ago. It’s a wonderful feeling now when I meet people to know that we will greet each other with a smile instead of a stressed out, angry snarl. Not only is being unhappy exhausting, but when I know that many of my relationship encounters are going to be unhappy and stressful I become even more overwhelmed. I don’t have to be tense and upset in anticipation of an unpleasant encounter because generally there are none.

Now I find that I gain positive energy from the majority of the people I interact with which bounces positive energy off of me and back into the Universe.

My happiness moment today was spending the school day at the zoo with Jacob and his grade. I was one of the parent volunteers who accompanied the teachers and kids for the day (reproduction habits in animals – that was fun with a bunch of hormonal teenagers hahahaha). The teachers were all so kind and happy. Every time anything happened instead of furrowing brows and being cross, they smiled and worked through the situation. I was really impressed with how genuinely kind they all seemed to be, they certainly were welcoming to me the newcomer, and the fact that the kids were all so well behaved speaks volumes for how well this positive attitude works.


It goes without saying that the mere fact that my 14 year old actually asked me to join them on the field trip and thereby be seen in public with him was a bonus happiness moment.

As an extra special bonus happiness burst, while we were at the zoo, Jenna was home on an extra long weekend day off from school. They are weaning cattle on the ranch right now and my cousin very kindly took her riding and let her help out. For a city-turned-country kid who loves the country and loves horses this was a most magical day. Just the fact that things like this are available to us brings me gratitude and happiness.

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Twirl it, girl 

  
If you were to pick something that is the opposite of what Melissa would do, it’s baton twirling. Yet it seems to be a passion for Jenna. And for that exact reason I love that it’s something that we go do on Saturdays. Well, Jenna does it and I cheer her on. 

Watching her discover a passion brings me immense joy and happiness. Getting to share it with her is an honour. My happiness moment today. 

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Potato patch

This garden has been a great source of joy for us over the summer. I can’t believe the time has already come (and we are pushing it) to take the last veggies out to store for the winter. It does not seem like that long ago that Jacob and my brother in law planted while mom and dad supervised. And yet, it seems like a life time ago – because Dad was still here with us.   Next year we will be better at weeding… next year. Given all that was going on this year I’m still pretty happy we managed to grow anything. It never would have happened at all if my brother in law hadn’t given the gift of his time and energy to dig out the garden for us.

My happiness moment today was digging in the garden with my kids. It was great to come together for this chore that didn’t end up feeling very chore-like. I was impressed at how strong Jacob is – he can do such a better job than I can of digging down to find the potatoes. Listening to Jenna’s giggle every time she found a potato to put in the pile brought a smile to all of our faces. What a great day!

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Funky Bunch

This quote came up from Louise Hay on my Facebook feed earlier today and I’ve been thinking about how this has become true for me over the past few months. If you had tried to explain to me at the start of the year, when I was beginning my Happiness Journey I wouldn’t have been able to understand the difference. Back then, from the state I was coming from, just being able to search for happiness was a big deal. I am still actively seeking happiness, but I have also found that I am able now to follow my joy (or my bliss). Not only have I been slowly able to discover what that bliss is, but I am in the process of giving myself permission to follow it and be happy. That’s been a bigger step than anything else. Allowing myself to be happy, reminding myself that I am worthy of it and that I deserve it.

A few weeks ago I took one of those silly Facebook quizzes “what is your 60s theme song”. Mine was Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys – it actually is my favourite Beach Boys song and one that I turn up every time it comes on the radio. Today, however, another Good Vibrations came on the radio – the one by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. Remember them? Awesome times…. Anyway, because I’m me, I started car dancing to it. This was moderately ok while we were on the back road, but once we turned onto the road into town Jacob was horrified with me. But, it’s Marky Mark, I said…. I used to dance on the speakers to this song I said (I was quite awesome in my time). Jacob informed me that some white people can dance, but mom, you’re not one of them. Whatever. It was fun. It lifted my spirits and brought me joy. I did reel it in a little bit so as not to completely humiliate him (it was hard).

Our times to and from school are some of the best parts of the day. It’s an easy drive – it’s a back road I’ve been driving my whole life, and the biggest issue is either deer crossing the road or someone in a tractor – so the fact that I don’t have commuting stress makes a huge difference in the mood of the car. The kids are at their funniest, and I get a chance to really find out what’s going on in their lives.

Today on the way back home I felt kind of like we were a funky bunch as the kids were reaching back and forth tickling each other, laughing, and singing along with the radio. That kind of happiness or joy just happens. I don’t have to seek it out anymore because we are all a lot happier in our souls now, now we can just allow it to flow. But, I still take the time to be grateful and appreciate it. This was my happiness moment today.

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It’s who you are

I love it when my kids are faced with challenges that give them the opportunity to show who they really are. Both of my kids have a good, strong, honest, solid, character. I’m not just saying this because I wear mom goggles (although I freely admit that I do), but because time and time again when they face obstacles they overcome them with honesty and grace. I’m a better person because they are in my life. 

Jacob had two such opportunities today. He was in a group of boys on Monday who were goofing around in class and were supposed to come in today for lunch detention. Jacob has already told me about it, he knew he shouldn’t have been doing it – but sometimes these things happen and all we can do is go and make it right. 

Jacob and one other boy were the only ones out of the group who showed up today and took their punishment. Because of this, the teacher let them talk quietly and then let them go after lunch. She thanked them for their honesty in showing up. 

I told Jacob how proud I was that he’d gone and taken the punishment. It let the teacher know what kind of person he is. She now  knows that while he is a teen and sometimes gets to talking too much, he’s also honest and reliable. 

His second incident today was with a peer. 

Jacob keeps his hair trimmed very short – he alway has – and it looks good on him. It’s neat, tidy, and easy to care for. Some kid has decided to mock him for this look and call him Caillou (only in Canada would he be teased by being called Caillou). It’s been going on for a little while, and although Jacob generally ignores the kid, it does bother him. 

Today the kid came up and started calling him Caillou again and then started humming  the theme song  – worst song ever for being an ear worm by the way. Jacob said he looked the kid dead on and then started bouncing in time to the music singing Caillou c’est moi, je suis Caillou. He said it shocked the kid so badly he didn’t know what to say and just turned and walked away. 

So proud of him. He was in a situation that could have led to a big confrontation and instead he turned the other cheek. By remaining passive and not playing into the teasing, yet at the same time standing up for himself he diffused the entire situation. 

This is a great example of the character of my kid. This is who he is at the core of his being and I couldn’t be prouder that when it matters these are the character traits he draws from. 

Today my happiness moment is being shown what a kind, honest, respectful, happy kid I have. I’m lucky to have him  call me mom. 

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Those extra moments

I have to admit, I was a little concerned how we would fill all the extra time we have this year before and after school. Jacob’s school starts and ends an hour after Jenna’s school; not enough time to come home in between, too much time to just sit there and do nothing.

In the mornings Jacob and I usually go to Tim Horton’s, buy the cheapest drink we can, soak up their free wifi, and visit with each other. It’s been interesting how this has evolved into a special time that we both look forward to. We have got hooked on the iPhone version of connect4 and challenge each other to tournaments. This usually involves a lot of cheering and happy dancing on the part of the person who wins.

My happiness moment today was sitting by the fireplace at our local Tim Horton’s, sipping on a tea, playing connect4 with my teenager. These extra moments are more and more precious the older he gets. I’m grateful he wants to spend time with me and that we have this quiet time to visit and catch up on each other’s lives.

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Don’t feel like dancing

I love it when what I think is my happiness moment for the day morphs into a different yet somehow related happiness moment of extended bliss. 

This morning Jacob and I had to go into the drug store to get me some cough drops (still. Hack. Hack). Their radio was playing Don’t feel like dancing  by the Scissor Sisters. 

Jacob and I hid in the back corner of the store and danced around a little bit giggling so hard I snorted. I couldn’t believe he actually let me do that in public (the dancing and the snorting). Afterwards he shook his shoulders and said so that just happened. And then we went back to pretending to be normal. 

Obviously that was my happiness moment. It’s so wonderful to just let loose a little bit. The fact that I could do it with him was that much better. 

When we lived in Quebec, the Scissor Sisters had a link on their page where you could go make photos of people dance to their song. Little 4 year old Jacob and I spent hours pasting our faces onto the bodies and watching them dance around to the video. It was entertainment for days. 

I thought about that this morning and I thought about the friends I had in Quebec. I managed to surround myself with a really amazing group of women in the time I lived there. It was a pack of girlfriends unlike any other I’ve had in my life. 

A great thing about being home again is I get to retrieve old members of my tribe. Friends I’ve had from long ago but haven’t had a chance to spend time with in years. 

This afternoon I met two old friends for lunch. They are ladies I met 14+ years ago at our birth and babies class. Being able to reconnect with these friendships is so important to my soul and my happiness. It was a great lunch – 23C out so we sat outside on the patio, lots of catching up and smiles and sharing. An extended happiness moment. As a bonus we discovered the Canadian 100$ bill really does smell of maple syrup (Canada you are awesome). 

The song may be Don’t Feel Like Dancing, but it left me feeling the happiness rhythm all day long. 

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