Tag Archives: tribe

happiness

Keeping the faith

I woke up this morning pretty ticked off with God. There’s no nice way to say it, I wasn’t questioning His existence, but rather questioning why He seems to enjoy seeing how much I can take before I break.

Yesterday the boy told me how he felt that his generation hasn’t been raised in the church and he that blamed my generation for that. He said how grateful he was that I’d taken them to church and led them on a path to get to know God.

With that in mind I took my pity party to church this morning in hopes that the sermon would provide me some comfort. It didn’t. It probably annoyed me more than any sermon has in years. Fortunately it was a guest speaker, but I will be happy to not have to hear him again.

I left church still pretty pissy with God. As we came over the hill on our way home and looked out over the ranch and the mountains I stopped the car. I said this is how I know God exists and that he’s not a complete jerk. Look at how beautiful this is, only love could make something so amazing.

Figures since I’ve always found God at the ranch. But it’s not just the place, although it’s very spiritual for me, it’s the people – the tribe – who remind me that God exists in everything.

I stopped by my uncle and aunt’s place to pick up some food for my mom. Watching how my family loves and cares for each other – that’s God stuff, that’s God in the details, that is a reminder that we aren’t walking this journey alone. That is happiness

A photo my dad took of the mountains in the background of the ranch. This is my spiritual happy ground

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Look around

I have spent the last week really humbled by the amount of love and compassion I have seen in the people around me.

If you are able to stop and look around – really look into the souls of the people you walk by – are they living with love or living with fear? I’ve spent a lot of time recently with people who are in fearful situations and yet they are pouring love out of their souls. It is a beautiful thing and it is happiness.

And as an extra moment of happiness, I get to look into this face, these eyes, every single day. How blessed am I?

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The Christmas List

I got a massive text on my phone earlier this evening – a wish list from my daughter for Christmas. Proof that she is stuck in the years between, not quite a young adult, no longer a child. Makeup, hair accessories, earrings are on the list – but so are Lego, stuffies, and chocolate. I love it – grow up but stay a child my love.

She came into my room and sat beside me and giggled her way through her list. Christmas music is now allowed in our house (the kids put on the time ban not I).

It was just such a beautiful, normal moment. And that is where happiness is found, inside the small everyday things. It’s love, it’s happiness.

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That November 15 thing 

There are days that come where the last thing I want to do is find a moment of happiness. Sometimes it feels like things just plain suck, but this is exactly why I do this blog – it’s to remind me that every moment has the potential for happiness. Some moments are greater than others, but there is happiness, peace, love, joy to be found in every moment.

Today would have been Dad’s 77th birthday. I still can’t believe he’s gone, I still want to run over and tell him things when they happen, I look for him when I need advice, I just miss him. He really was quite an exceptional man.

When I look back on my childhood I think the greatest gift I had was the gift of unconditional love. I never once doubted that no matter what I did, how badly I screwed up, what disaster I found myself in, or what amazing things I had to celebrate that my parents loved me and were behind me completely. I didn’t realize what a rare gift that was – to me it was just how life was.

I mean sure, there were those years in my teens when they became totally irrational, but besides that they were pretty amazing parents.

So much is changing right now I can’t catch my breath. I need to sit in the moment and yet I don’t want to. But I will.

My happiness moment today is remembering and celebrating my dad, loving and holding space with my mom, and being so incredibly grateful that I have my sister to walk this path with.

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Change the world through compassion 

That was the message of the sermon today change the world through compassion. 

I needed to hear that.  More about love and compassion, less about fear and hate 

I let fear sneak back into my heart last week. 

Instead of focusing on what we don’t have I need to put my energy focusing on what we do have. Love, family, peace, safety, freedom. And then focusing on what I have to give. 

I should be giving more. I need to give more of myself. If we all showed more compassion towards each other the world would be a much better place. And that would be a world filed with happiness. 

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The 11th hour 

I got in the car this morning stressed out and in a rush. I put it in reverse and was about to race out of the yard when I listened to what the radio announcer was saying 

It was 11:00 and they were starting their minute of silence

So I stopped my rushing, put the car in park and sat for a minute of gratitude. I love Canada and I’m so thankful we live in this amazing county. It is happiness. 

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Run down 

I realized this morning how run down I was feeling. I haven’t been sleeping well and I’ve been under a lot of stress and that is always a recipe for disaster 

I stopped things today and did a reset of my intentions. If I don’t look after myself, everything else falls apart. 

I celebrated a day of quiet self care at home this evening with the boy – we watched some belly laughing shows. Happiness. 

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Bad moms 

I had a girls night with a soul sister tonight. We went and saw Bad Moms with a theatre full of other bad moms who needed an evening of laughter. 

It was so funny. I feel like I’ve had an ass dragging time lately and to just sit and laugh at stupid things for an hour and a half was exactly what I needed. 

I left feeling lighter, happier, and so grateful for my girlfriends. 

Happiness ❤️

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The power of a smile

This morning I was walking through the hospital trying to both look and not look at the people I was passing by. So many people are upset, scared, sad and I never want to infringe on an emotional moment – but I don’t like to walk looking at the ground either.

As I was walking past one lady we made eye contact and she flashed the kindest smile, it lit up her whole face like a sunbeam was shining out of her. It’s amazing how good it felt to be on the receiving end of that kind smile – it cheered me up and left me smiling at the next person I passed. Pay it forward happiness style.

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