Tag Archives: alberta

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Friendship. 

I had tea today with a dear friend. She’s a wonderful combination of friend and family – I have always felt so comfortable around her and we have always been able to talk about anything. We sat on out on her beautiful deck looking at the mountains and fields and sky and chatted for hours. I love the kind of friendship where you can talk about everything and nothing. 

She said something today that made me think about the effort I need to put into my friendships – even these easy ones. Maybe especially these easy ones. She didn’t say this in relation to me, yet it hit home. It was that some of us want to have friends, we complain about not having friends or spending enough time with friends – yet we don’t want to put in the effort that comes with having a friend. I’m so like that. I never get together with my friends. What? Go out tonight? But I’m tired. I want to go to bed and read.  It’s the unfortunate price of being an introvert. Yet when I’m out and with my friends I’m so happy. 

So, I need to stay mindful of putting in that effort because it brings me joy. 

Sitting with her and chin-wagging was a happiness moment. 

A bonus one was coming home to a bored little girl and doing this to entertain her:

   
   
Like a friendship, it took some effort – an hour to catch and tack up the horses – but so worth it. I actually enjoy the process of riding almost as much as the actual riding. 

I mentioned during my visit today that if I could pick what I wanted to be when I grow up that it would be what I’m doing right now. I love being with the kids, being a mom full time, working on strengthening all of our relationships. I am very blessed and grateful. 

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Coming home 

 It is so important to have somewhere you can come home to. Whether that is a physical location or a state of mind- we all need that safe place where we can relax and be ourselves and be loved. 

Tonight we celebrated the coming home of more family who are living away – who have  a home away from home, and yet always know that there is the safety and security of this original home. It was so good for my soul to have this little celebration and visit with cousins I haven’t seen in too long – to see a little who was a babe the last time I saw him and now is an amazing kid with the cute high pitched helium like voice. 

I was talking with a cousin tonight about what we would do if we won the lottery. We both agreed that the security would be a huge load off our minds – to know we are cared for and can provide for our loved ones – but that there wasn’t much in the day to day that we would change. We both smiled at each other and said I love my life. There isn’t much that I need to change in it. What a brilliant happiness moment inside a larger happiness moment. The realization that we are living happy lives. 

  

Because we live in the most beautiful place. A lucky rainbow shone on us for a really long time. It kept changing and shifting, but it was celebrating right along with us (thanks Dad). 
 

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Hanging on the edge of a cliff. 

After posting yesterday about loving fearlessly I had a conversation with my mom about how I felt like I was also living clinging to the edge of a cliff. Generally I think I’m doing really well. I’m happier than I’ve been in years, I’m home surrounded by family in beautiful Alberta. I feel generally like I’m dealing with the fact that Dad died (I hate saying that) really well. 

Until something happens that makes me realize that even with all those wonderful things I’m living right now clinging to the edge of a cliff. I absolutely can not have anything more happen at this moment to the people I love. The mere mention of someone close to me having some kind of health problem is enough to send me into a free fall of tears. 

It actually does not even have to be someone I know. I was at Rogers yesterday sorting out my phone and a lady came in. She had just taken her husband to emergency and he had taken her phone leaving her without one. She needed to get something quickly so they could stay in contact. A huge stress purchase done under intense emotional duress. I wished the phone I was trying to hook up had ended up working and I would have just given it to her. But seeing her emotional pain was enough to send me to my car crying for a little while. 

I am respecting  the fact that I’m both in a really good and really strong place emotionally and at the exact same time in a really fragile place. The two places don’t seem like they should coexist but they are, so I know it’s possible. 

Two happiness moments today. We had friends from Virginia stop by for a visit. They were headed to a family reunion and went right by our place. It was so nice to see friends from one of our other homes. They’re a lovely family, a good reminder of some of the good things that came from our time away. 

  
The second happiness moment was getting Jenna’s phone hooked up today. She had my old iPhone but it got lost during the move so she’d been without one for about 3 months. Normally not a big deal, but without a home phone we need a way to communicate. Her grandma gave her an old flip phone that we hooked up. Jenna is so much happier with the flip phone. She says she loves the size, loves flipping it open and shut, and loves carrying it around. Impressive that it made her so happy when we have all been trained that smart phones are the way to go. I was proud that she liked this phone better because it was the best fit for her, not because it was what everyone said was cool. Smart kid!

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The quiet breath 

Since today is about breathing in the quiet and it was my focus – the Universe shared a couple of amazing quiet moments with me this evening and now I will share them with you. 

This was my view on my drive (westward) 

home this evening. I had to pull off and stare at the sky for a while.    

The sky as I was walking over to my Mom’s house: a view to the east. 
 

The benefit of being able to stop and breathe in the silence is that I am able to appreciate perfect moments like this. It’s an amazing and wonderful world. 

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Just another day in paradise. 

We have been away from home long enough that I don’t believe I will ever take for granted how wonderful it is to be back here. Every once in a while though something happens that serves as a good reminder as to the blessings we have. 

This afternoon I headed to the Petro Canada to get batteries for our raft pump so we could go to the creek. Because it’s Friday and a long weekend, the line up to the gas station was all the way back out to the highway. So many people heading to the mountains for the weekend. Fortunate and blessed people in their own way. But all I needed to do was grab some batteries, go home, and head down the hill and we were instantly on vacation. 

  
I love this spot. We have swam and skated this creek with Dad all our lives. I’ve spent hundreds of hours riding Pirate through the fields in younger days. It’s a very healing place. A difficult place sometimes this year, but even so a healihg place. A place I’ve needed to be. 

The kids started out on their rafts and were looking around for someone to pull them upstream and flip them. Dad’s thing to do with the kids. In the amazing way children  have of being in the present moment, they figured out a way to take turns flipping each other off. Not the same as it was – a new normal. Since that is what life is about right now it was a good lesson. Learning to love and live in the new normal. 

Dad loved this place so much I know he is looking down on us and happy that we are moving on, finding happiness, living life. Missing him terribly, but living in this new normal. 

It was Dottie’s first time seeing me on the raft. At first it caused her concern, then she decided she had better join me to keep me safe. 

   My loving dog actually climbed right up, stood on me and then shook her stinky, wet dot hair all over soaking me in the process. I love her. 
A happiness moment that lasted all afternoon. Lazy days at the creek. Deep gratitude for this day. We live in abundance. 

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The Bar U 20th Anniversary. 

The kids and I took a trip to Southern Alberta today to attend the 20th anniversary of the Bar U Ranch being a national historic site. Because the kids are Albertans who were not raised in Alberta, I feel an extra responsibility to teach them about their heritage. 

I love the drive south down highway 22 and today was a beautiful, clear, sunny day which made it that much more enjoyable. 

I knew it was going to be a good drive when it started off with Don’t Stop Believin’ on the radio. The kids were chatting away and as soon as the song started they both stopped talking mid sentence and sang the entire song, then went right back into their chatter. 

I love our mountains. Enjoying the scenery made the drive go by so quickly. 

One of the first things we noticed when we were walking around the inside of the Bar U information centre was the brands that were lining the top of the walls. After a little hunting, we found our family ranch brand that had been placed in memory of my Grandpa. That was fun to find, and made the kids feel a bit more connected to what we were doing. 

   Because we were slow we missed the horse drawn wagon that was taking people down the the main ranch area. So we had to hoof it ourselves. An easy stroll downhill lookin at the mountains – what a hardship eh? 

We went into the blacksmith shop and he gave us a little history lesson on how the Bar U came to be and why it was such an important ranch in Alberta. 

  This was the highlight for the kids. Learning how to lasso. They were actually pretty good at it and would have stayed there all day if they could have. 

  I however, wanted to go watch the Blackfoot Dancers. They were amazing. I felt so honoured that they shared this with us. The best part was that at the end they invited the spectators to join them in a dance. It felt so good to move around with the drums beating and them dancing. 

  Of course as soon as they could the kids were back to lassoing. They actually went to the gift shop and bought their own so they could lasso each other. 

Jacob said I should go get one for when they weren’t listening to me and I could just yell and rope them. As the day went on this seemed like a better and better idea. 

  When we left the Bar U I took the kids a bit further west towards the place where my best childhood friend came from. 

First though we had to drive past the littlest church. It was just as small as I remembered it from days of yore. 

  And here we are, birthplace of Pirate Gold – aka my best friend aka my best pony buddy. 

  And honestly, no wonder I enjoyed the time I spent down here learning how to ride him. It’s so breathtaking. 

  By the time we reached Bragg Creek on our drive home we were hangry so we stopped for some Italian food and some intense giggles. I can’t remember when we have laughed harder at a meal. Thank goodness we were outside. 

  One of those wonderful big happiness days. We are having more and more days filled with happiness. I know that this is because we are focusing on bringing happiness into our lives. Even amidst the mourning and the sorrow and the intense feeling of loss we carry about my Dad, we are still finding joy in the days. I know he would want that for us and that knowledge helps motivate me to keep seeking it out even when I want to just curl up in a ball. 

My happiness moment was when we were invited into the Blackfoot dance circle to join them. What an honour and how exciting to get to do something so different. 

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Take the step 

The more I walk on this path the more I believe that what I think about is what I attract. It’s a big part of why I have my daily happiness moments – to make sure that at least one time a day I’m actively seeking and attracting happiness into my life. 

Last night as I was falling asleep I was thinking of time I spent as a youth in Southern Alberta. My parents had bought me a pony from one of the ranches south west of Longview (Pirate, my best friend through my teen years and well into adulthood). A bonus of this purchase was some time spent over a couple of  summers at their ranch taking lessons and hanging out. It is one of the most beautiful places I’ve been to. Very similar to home and yet more rural and therefore a bit different. 

This morning I had a call from my cousin asking if I could pick up her daughter and a friend at their camp. Camp was about 45 minutes south of the same ranch I had fallen asleep thinking about. The law of attraction. 

Jenna and I enjoyed a beautiful backroads drive along the Rocky Mountains. It was a stunning day, and enjoying her company while enjoying the beauty of our mountains was indeed a happiness moment. 

  

Here we are up on the top of the mountain. You can see the road we had to travel off on the side. No safety net with this one – just a big drop off the side. 
  

We had to drive pretty much straight down this mountain. It’s a very narrow gravel road and there are no guard rails. I was more than a little anxious driving up the mountain – and we were on the side with the hill in that direction. I had no idea how I was going to get us back down. I am not a big fan of heights, and although my anxiety has calmed down incredibly- there is still the underlying fear that a panic arrack could rear it’s ugly head. 

I contemplated my choices – which were not many – and then bravely started driving down. Breathe deeply, breathe slowly, think with confidence, have faith that I can accomplish this task and that I am doing the right thing. 

Pretty much the same mantra I’ve been carrying for the past few months. It worked for me both in daily life and also to get down the mountain. Take the step, have faith that the next step will be there. 

Is this not seriously the most beautiful place that I am so fortunate as to call home?

The view from the top of the road. I kept my faith and the road rose up to meet me. 

 

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Ungratitude Gratitude

I was walking home tonight having an ungrateful inner moment. Actually, what happened was that I came out of my mom’s house and saw one of her flower pots knocked over. I was tired and thought oh I’ll just leave that until tomorrow. Then I heard my Dad’s voice clearly in my head saying you need to go pick that up. Just do it. So I did. Then I looked up at the sky and made a face akin to the ones I made as a teenager. The scrunched up scowl of I hope you’re happy because I’m not. I walked across the cattle guard and looked north to see this: 

   
 
So I’m assuming the answer was yes, I am happy. And now you are too. And he was right. The beauty of life makes me happy. 

Bonus happiness moment today. 

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Canada (boxing) Day in Waterton

Boxing Day is generally my favourite day of the year. It’s the day after Christmas, when we get to just relax and hang with family and enjoy everything we weren’t able to during the chaos of Christmas. 

I feel today like we took a Boxing Day for Canada’s birthday. A day just for the enjoyment of each other. 

The kids and I headed to Waterton – one of the most beautiful places on earth in my opinion. 

I woke up at 5:30 to this view from my bedroom window. When a day starts like this, you just know it’s going to be a good one.  By the way, that’s the moon hanging over the mountains. An amazing full moon.   

We arrived in Waterton and went through the bison paddock. There aren’t any shown in this picture, but the view….

Then off to the town to skip rocks. Part of our routine from last year. I love this lake.  

  

Next up: flower hunting. Last year we were too late, but this year was perfect. 

Here’s our provincial flower the wild rose. 
  

A stop on the way to Red Rock Canyon. I was looking for flowers, they were looking for the water to play in at the end. 

  

Yellow Paintbrish, it’s rare to find, but it was all over this meadow. Beauty. My spirit sings here. 

More of them. I got obsessed.   

  

Monsters still waiting to get to the canyon. 

At last the canyon and some water to cool off in. It was almost 30C and there was no wind. A big deal in a place where the trees grow sideways from the blowing! 

We had to drive up to Cameron Lake which was unfortunately very busy and we couldn’t rent boats. Fortunately though we came across tons of Bear Grass which is unique to this area. 

 A long drive home chasing the sunset (and being chased by the moon) and I feel like my soul has been strengthened and cleansed. I need these kind of days where we just stop and enjoy each other’s company and marvel at the beauty that is in the world. 

  
The great thing about it being light from 4:30 am until 11:00 pm is that we sure can pack a lot into a day. 

This was a much needed break.  I’m so thankful that I had this day to nourish my soul and fill up my heart with happiness. 

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