Tag Archives: tribe

happiness

Rebalancing 

Today was a day focused on rebalancing, repairing, and regaining strength. It has been an emotionally exhausting week as I have watched my kids go through so much pain and heartache.  I know they will come through this stronger and wiser, I just wish they didn’t have to go through it at all. 

I remember talking with Dad on one of our walks about his worries about his connection with God. He’d been spending so much time in prayer and meditation, working at making his relationship as strong as he possibly could. At the time we were walking his medication was making it increasingly difficult to keep up his practice and he was worried that his connection was not as strong. We talked about how he had built up a reserve of faith and strength that was getting him through that tough time. 

In a different way I feel like that now. I work to keep my faith strong, but times like this deplete some of my reserves. It’s so important now to fill that space back up so that I can walk stronger on my path. 

So today I rebalanced things. 

I did some yoga and strengthened and rebalanced my poor stressed out body a bit. 

I walked with my cousin in law and dear friend this morning. We laugh and talk about everything – and usually end up doubled over in hysterics at least at one point in every visit. But we also talk about more serious things. So today, along with some giggles, we discussed how we talk to God and what that means to us. Also we talked of how hard that is to do sometimes. I love being able to have such an honest conversation about our thoughts and beliefs. It helps to ground me and rebalance me. 

Then I had more of my reserves built up and had more to give to my kids who desperately needed rebalancing too. We spent the evening together eating supper and laughing with each other. We are a strong little unit but we need our tribe around us to keep us balanced and focused.  

A happiness rebalancing day. Gaining strength, remembering to love each other, working back into peace. 

Standard
happiness

Healing steps 

Today we took a huge step on our healing journey. It didn’t go the way that we had hoped, but I’m learning that prayers are always answered and that there’s a reason for everything. The fact that my kid took the steps he did despite so many fears shows his desire to heal and be happy. 

I am so incredibly proud of my son. He showed huge courage, strength, compassion, openness, and forgiveness today. The person he was seeking healing with didn’t show up for him, but he learned so much today and walked through it with grace and dignity. He is an inspiration to me and I am forever grateful that God blessed me with his light. 

We have had a huge amount of support from our tribe who have stood beside him quietly showing love while he sorts through what is going on in his heart. 

My happiness moment was one in the midst of deep heartbreak as I saw the level of inner strength that my son possesses within his soul. His faith and his strength will carry him far in life. 

Standard
happiness

At the kids’ table

Tonight we attended a party at the hall for the TV show Context with Lorna Duek – which is a a news program done from a Christian perspective. It surprised me how powerful I found the evening and I’m going to blog about it later – when it’s not 10pm and I know I have to get up for a busy day at the Stampede tomorrow. 

My cousins and I were there to help out with what we could – but we also got to listen and learn a bit about their mission which I found fascinating. We were in the back room of the hall while everyone was getting seated for supper – I wish I could say we were working but really we were eating copious amounts of garlic cheese dip and laughing – and we realized that we were going to have to split up to eat. 

My brilliant cousin said I think we need a kids’ table. Let’s set up a kids’ table for us to sit at. This remains our delight at family functions when us kids – all now in our 40s and 50s – can sit at the kids’ table and laugh and be silly just like we have done  since we really were kids. It was kind of a shocker when the actual children thought they also should sit at the kids’ table but we adjusted….

My happiness moment – knowing that we will never be too old to need to be at our own kids’ table. 

Standard
happiness

Bestie

Today was an extra special day in my life. One of my old high school friends – the good kind that knows where all the bodies are buried and has helped me bury a few – is here for a visit. There’s something so awesomely comfortable about an old friend who just knows. We go years and years without a visit and then it’s like no time at all has passed. There’s old things to laugh about and new things to share. 

Since our last visit about 6 years between the two of us we have gone through almost every major life change except a marriage. Obviously there’s lots to catch up on. A happiness moment for me was meeting her beautiful granddaughter who calls her bestie because that is what they are. I feel so fortunate to have such a strong woman in my tribe. She has stepped up to the plate time and time again and I admire that. 

Standard
happiness

Old times 

I had a quiet evening at my mom’s house – sitting in Grandma’s Kitchen – looking at old photos. Last year when dad was in the hospital I started taking in old albums and going through them with him. After he died I couldn’t finish going through them. It seems enough time has gone by that I could bear to open them again. 

We had such a fun, weird, busy, horse filled childhood. It was heart warming to look at old Pony Club photos of our little gang of riders doing things that would be considered much to dangerous now to even talk about. Yet somehow we all survived and turned out to be an incredibly strong bunch of women. 

As well as the horse photos I found some good ones of play times with my sister. Like the day I decided to turn her into a knight 


And one of my favourite skating memories at the creek with my sister and cousins 


My mom and uncle tied rope to the back of the truck and pulled us kids down the creek. So. Much. Fun. 


I love being back here for so many reasons, but near the top is the fact that my kids will get to grow up in this tribe and will make it their own. Jenna spent the afternoon with her cousins down south on the ranch pulling chamomile weeds. She came back tired and full of stories which exactly how it should be. 

Family memories – a heart bliss happiness moment. 

Standard
happiness

After the storm 

I drove through an intense rain/hail storm this afternoon on my way into Cochrane. For a while I couldn’t even see the wipers on the other side of the windshield. Fortunately I got to my destination safely (albeit a little late) and picked up some girls eager to start their summer vacation. 

Jenna is having an end of the year sleepover with 3 of her girlfriends. I am so happy for her that she has finally reached that point in being settled here that she has begun the  formation of her own tribe. 

On the way home we drove through the hay valley and pulled over to see how much damage there was from the hail. It was like driving in the winter there was so much ice on the ground. 

The girls got out of the car and had an impromptu hail fight on the side of the road. Watching them enjoy themselves in a moment of spontaneous joy was my happiness moment for the day. 

Standard
happiness

Thrive in your tribe 

Those of you who know me in real life know that I often laugh about how I don’t like people. And while I do often find being around too many people for too long overwhelming, I am also well aware that I need my tribe in order to thrive. 

A good thing about my tribe is we laugh together about being so introverted we need people breaks on a regular basis – we all get each other that way which makes it easy. And there is the odd extrovert which is also a good thing because they get me in a different way. 

The important thing though, is that we laugh together. More and more I am grateful for my people, and understand the importance of getting together with them and strengthening those bonds. I have a lot of women in my extended family which means I was fortunate enough to have been born with a ready made tribe. We are all realizing how lucky we are to have this built in support system and I can see more and more we are taking advantage of it. 

Today we had a cousin lunch in town which included me and two cousins and my mom and her cousin’s wife. Even when we don’t see each other on a regular basis, we share the same background and have the same kinds of stories. These are some of my treasured relationships. Sharing stories and breaking bread with some of my fabulous women was my happiness moment today. 

Standard
happiness

It’s a year 

We made it through the first anniversary of dad’s passing. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it, but there were a lot of blessings in the day. It was a great way to remember that not only do I have a great tribe, but so did Dad. So many people reached out with love to help us remember him. 

We gardened (one of his passions), had a memorial ceremony for him, and went out for hamburgers. A very Dad approved day. 

I continue to be filled with so much gratitude that God gave me the Dad that he did. He taught me so much and helped guide me to be a better person. 

A few happiness moments today, planting the vegetable garden with Jacob, the memorial service, meeting up with old friends while out for supper, and an evening walk along the river with a friend. There are blessings everywhere. 

My dad

Standard
happiness

The heart of a father 

The closer we get to the first anniversary of dad’s passing the more I feel all these emotions coming up. I think there was a lot about the last couple of weeks of his life that I wasn’t able to process. There was so much going on, we were so in the moment and also fearing the moment at the same time. I still can’t believe it’s been almost a year. 

For the first time since he died, today I sat at the computer and went through some of his “best of” photos. Dad was an amazing photographer and looking at the memories he left for us made me cry and feel joy at the same time. It wasn’t long before one by one, everyone in the house joined me in an impromptu memorial. We talked about dad, shared memories, shared feelings, laughed at old stories, discussed what a talented photographer he was, and honoured his presence in our lives. 

I’m so grateful we have each other to work through this with. There were many tears today, and I’m sure there will be many more over the next couple of weeks. But I am so grateful he was my dad and that he was such a good dad. 

This is one of his photos of a place where he loved to walk. We went up and down this path countless times together. Some of his ashes are now scattered here so he can always be close to one of his beloved spots. 


Two happiness moments today. The big, spiritual one was quiet time shared with my mom and sister as we talked about dad. 

The other one was a crazy, messed up game of Twister after supper. 

I am so thankful for my tribe. 

Standard