Tag Archives: gratitude

happiness

If you don’t tell your story, someone else will. 

If you don’t tell your story, someone else will 

I came across this quote this morning while reading an article about the Canadian beef industry. Given my family and background, the article held a lot of interest to me because of the content. But, that quote just leapt out at me and hit me right in the soul. 

I have let someone else tell my story for a long time. Finally after a lot of work and faith building I am strong enough to start to tell my own story. 

My close tribe already know most of it. They have been my angels who have held me up as I have regained my strength and sense of self worth. Many others have just sensed it and have reached in with loving help. 

I have a feeling it will get worse before it gets better, but I also know that I am strong enough to stand in this storm. 

I spent some time doing some energy work this morning with my dear friend and mentor Asrael from Ananda Ayurveda. I can’t express properly the gratitude I have for this wonderful, spiritual woman who had guided me out of my darkness. 

We worked on helping let go of a lot of the painful emotions that are coming my way. I have been putting myself in the path of the strong chinook winds and letting them blow all the yuck out of me – both in my imagination and literally as I stand on the ridge and cleanse my soul. As we were deep in our energy work Ella the Yoga Cat (who loves Asrael and always comes and hangs out when we work together) came by. She punched me in the head, glared at me, then turned and stuck her fancy tail up in the air and marched away. I don’t think she liked the energy I was getting rid of!! Me neither but I’m glad to have it gone! 

This morning I started my happiness moment early as I ran outside in my bare feet and danced around appreciating the beautiful sunrise. Ok, I was mostly dancing because my feet were cold. But it was a glorious way to start the day. A lot of good things are happening.   

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When you start to let it go 

Happiness comes in many different forms, for me it’s so much more than belly laughs and ice cream. It’s that feeling deep in my soul that I’m following my bliss, living my dharma, balanced from within. 

My happiness moment today came from seeing a lightness in my son. He’s been carrying around so much inside and has been slowly able to start letting it out. I’m so proud of him for being able to open up and share his feelings with adults whom he trusts. Watching how he’s learning to advocate for himself makes me incredibly proud of him, and even more secure in the knowledge that he’s one awesome child of God. 

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Digging for gophers 

I was chatting with a friend this morning and at the end of our conversation he said “have a great Monday, make it count”. I have to say that stuck with me today. I was overtired because I didn’t get a good sleep, Jenna was home sick, and it was just kind of a blah start to the day. 

Make it count. Yes, every day should count. Even those blah ones. So I had a quick nap (yay), felt a bit more like myself, did some course work, had a Golden Girl marathon with the girl, walked the dog on the ridge, had an unexpected visit with my aunt, and went in to wish the kids’ grandma a happy birthday. It was a day that counted – very much so- and a good one at that. 

 The Dotted Dog had spring fever today while we were walking. It was beautiful – I didn’t even have a coat on. She ran to every single gopher hole she could find and dug like mad trying to find whatever may be hiding down deep. I love watching the joy she brings to these walks. The freedom she has here has made her so much more complete (and I can relate to that). A dirt filled happiness moment. 

  

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What is love?

This past year has been filled with so many emotions. The pain and sorrow of losing Dad is still so fresh and there are a lot of mixed up emotions as I work my way through this divorce. 

One thing I do know is that love is the most important thing. I remember feeling in the last few weeks of Dad’s life that all that mattered at the time was love. It’s a lesson I’ve carried with me through this year. As long as I’m reaching for love and for happiness everything will be ok. 

It’s easy to get caught up in all the negativity. Today I realized I need to be focused on all the love in my life. And there is so much. We are so blessed to be here in the folds of our family, surrounded by people who love us just because we are us. 

I have a deep love for the animals who are in my life, both past and present. They have always provided me with grounding, security, and the understanding of what pure unconditional love is. All of our pets are rescued and have had less than comfortable starts to their lives. Yet, they love us (and each other) with unfiltered purity. 

We have a beautiful home in which all of us – humans and animals – live with the secure understanding that the love flowing through will always be there – no matter what. 

Today I passed Abu and Aladdin cuddled up together on the couch. I looked at them for quite a while thinking this is what true, pure love looks like. They are so comfortable with each other, it’s difficult to tell where one ends and the other begins. My happiness moment – witnessing a quiet moment of love between siblings.

    

      

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We are regulars now

Jacob and I have been enjoying a morning coffee break at Tim Horton’s almost every morning since last fall when school started up. Over these past months we have begun to recognize, and be recognized by, the other regulars who show up every morning.

After so many years of feeling almost invisible or only being known as those Canadians in our travels, I can’t even begin to describe how refreshing it is to now have this deep understanding that we are home.

Moving back here and making Cochrane our hometown again has been an interesting experience. I know Old Cochrane, I was raised as part of that community, my family has called the town home for generations. It’s always been a place I can come to and see neighbours, old friends, family, and other members of the community.

In the 10 years that we were gone, Cochrane boomed in size. The town has grown, there are so many new people, and an abundance of stores have opened their doors here. It has been an interesting experience this past year – showing the kids the Old Cochrane that I know and love so much, and exploring together the New Cochrane that exists now, one that I also hold a lot of fondness for.

Even now when we come into town we always see at least one person we know. The town has maintained a lot of it’s old, small town feel, and we have such a large web of community here. There is always that comfort of being home and in a familiar place. Yet, there is so many new things to explore – new restaurants to try, stores to visit, and people to meet.

The people here are still refreshingly friendly, there are smiles and casual greetings often exchanged on the street. People hold the doors open for each other.

It is home.

We have become regulars. The people at Tim’s know Jacob’s coffee order every morning. The other regulars all know where “our table” is, and we all comment if someone has switched up the seating arrangement. I love watching the groups of people who meet there every morning. There are groups of friends – most of them older – sitting, sharing coffee, laughing, and enjoying a beautiful start to the day. We are now a part of that community.

My happiness moment was sitting at Tim Horton’s realizing that we had this deep sense of belonging in this place we call home. Then I eavesdropped on this table of older men (perhaps late 70s or early 80s) and found they were laughing and sharing stories of running around their yards.  I have no idea what the context was – but watching them doubled over at the table in laughter while they told their tales made my whole day.

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Just relax 

Today I cashed in my birthday present – a massage, which was so desperately needed. 

There has been a lot of stress and upset in our house the last month or so. I’m so thankful we have had this happiness journey to guide us as we navigate this new course. It’s amazing how successful it is to change our mood by pointing our focus in a more positive direction. 

I went to this massage therapist a few times in the months after my Dad died, so she was already familiar with a bit of what has gone on in life life over the past year. 

I went in an overtired, stressed out, sad mess – but I left feeling so much calmer, confident, and secure. It’s amazing what a little bit of TLC will do for the body and soul. 

My happiness moment was when we shared a big hug before I left her place. It’s so healing to spend time with someone who is able to help put my being back into a more loving and kind place. 

As a secondary happiness moment, the kids and I cuddled up on the couch and watched The Goldbergs. This show has been a favourite of ours since it came on the air. 

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Kid-knees and whoopee cushions 

Tonight we celebrated the February birthdays in the family – my nephew (today) and my sister (tomorrow). After having missed years of these family celebrations I am continuously thankful that we are here now to participate. Having this extended family around us is so incredibly important in helping guide us and give us that sense of grounding and support 

  
While the entire evening of the family gathering together was my happiness moment, I had a couple of events stick out as especially funny ones. 

The first happened as I was reading a book with my niece about the different parts of your body. We were on the heart page which she was convinced was the kidney. Once she realized it was not (after her mommy confirmed that for her, because she’s still at the age where mommy knows best) we continued searching until we found it. Once we were on the correct kidney page, my niece put her bent  leg up towards me, pointed and said see auntie Melissa? Here’s my kid-knee. Priceless

Next, I walked in the room to find my nephew (who turned two today) jumping up and down on the whoopie cushion yelling fart fart fart over and over. 

There’s nothing like kids to being unexpected and delightful laughter. What a blessing that we have all these cousins around to enjoy. 

In a sentimental moment, I heard my uncle playing with my nephew, and the noises my uncle was making were exactly the sounds my dad made. For a minute I stopped and my heart thought dad was here. But my uncle is like another dad to me – in fact we call uncle dad – and it was so fitting that the laughter and joy were coming from those two. 

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Less anger, more laughter 

The kids and I stopped for a cup of tea today while doing our errands in town. Our cups came with these life lessons on them: 
There’s a lot about the situation we are in right now that we can’t change. But a lot of these tips for good health are totally within our control. We decided to focus on the last one less anger, more laughter. 

We realized that we needed more laughter to help pull us into a better place. With that in mind we got in the car and began our drive home. We had a couple of stops, so it took us about an hour. During that time we told jokes, acted silly, and laughed until our tummies hurt. You can’t be angry and laugh at the same time. 

I am so impressed by these two. They are brave and strong and so full of love. Silly laughter, a blessed happiness moment. 

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Stretch it out 

I woke up this morning and realized that it was time to deal with the fact that I’ve been ungrounded and out of sorts the past few days. 

Thank goodness for my Ayurvedic training. I’ve already been working at my sleep routines, but today I kicked it all up a notch. I cancelled other plans and put work to the side and spent the morning doing yoga, meditating, and going for a centring walk along the ridge with the dog 

This was the early morning view from the ridge. The moon had already gone to bed by the time I made it out there (this was yesterday morning’s photo)   
Because this was the walk I always did with dad, I stopped by where we had scattered some of his ashes and had a mini meltdown. I could feel him loving and guiding me as I gathered myself back together and carried on. 

As I was walking I was filled with gratitude that we are back in this place that is home – where we are safe and loved. 

My happiness moment was realizing that even in times of turmoil I have learned how to nurture and ground myself. Learning Ayurveda was one of the best things I’ve ever done. 

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Light it up 

My kids have a very special bond. Actually, the three of us are an extremely tight unit and I consider that one of my greatest blessings. We have been through a lot and it has drawn us together in a very unique, but strong way. 

They may at times be each other’s worst enemy, but they are also best friends and have each other’s back no matter what. I am so happy for them that they will go through life with such a friend. 

Jenna came from school today with an assignment. They had to create something that lit up and moves. She decided to build a tree of lothlorien from Lord of the Rings. Because that’s in Jacob’s wheelhouse she told me she was going to ask him for advice on how to build it. 

We came into the coffee shop to wait for her lesson and the two of them sat down and brainstormed. It is amazing to listen to them as they’re planning or building something (I sometimes hear this when they are playing minecraft together). 

They’ve figured out how to light it up and are still figuring out the movement. 

Everyone needs a good friend who knows exactly who you are and loves you for it. I’m so happy that these two have that. We are such a blessed little family. A lovely happiness moment.  

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