Tag Archives: gratitude

happiness

Forgiveness

The kids and I have had some pretty deep talks over the past couple of days about forgiveness and letting go of bad memories. I feel so guilty that I wasn’t able to protect them better, it’s something that sits heavy in my heart. They, on the other hand, don’t seem to feel the same way at all. The unconditional love and complete forgiveness that flows from them is overwhelming and humbling. It makes me want to walk with that kind of powerful love into all of my close relationships. It makes me able to begin forgive myself. 

My big happiness moment today was the boy telling me, out of the blue on the way home, that where we live now is the first place where he has ever felt totally safe. It gives me a lot of peace to know that finally I have been able to provide that for them. 

My gratitude happiness moment was walking my road with my mom tonight. I am so thankful that God brought us back to our tribe. 

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Tadasana

After a break that was much too long I spent an hour and a half easing my body into Tadasana this morning. I love the gentle yoga I learned at Kripalu and have a cd by Rudy Peirce that I purchased on a visit there years ago. Basically it’s 90 minutes spent getting into mountain pose. It sounds ridiculously easy, but there’s something about those slow and gentle stretches that is so powerful for my soul. 

I find that this yoga that is based on compassion is so much more a spiritual practice than it is a physical one. It’s such an effective way for me to realign myself and connect to my Source. I didn’t realize how disconnected I truly was until I sat in that quiet space. It was awesome and spiritual and happy. I love it. 

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Family trip 

My mom has as her screensaver photos from our big family trip to Italy in 2009. A  group of extended family got together to go celebrate the wedding of my cousin. It was so much fun. I had never been before and I think I probably slept about 6 hours in the 10 days we were there – we were so busy eating and seeing everything we possibly could. 
I love looking at those old photos. We were all so happy (and thinner and younger) – Dad looked so good in all the photos. It’s nice to go back to a time when there was a lot of joy in the family. 

I remember lying on my back floating in the Mediterranean laughing with my cousin. We laughed so hard our stomachs hurt – it was so carefree and easy. I loved that moment. 

Trevi fountain 
I have realized recently that we have finally reached a place where our little trio has started to feel secure enough to want to reach out and explore again. As we have discovered that  we are finally feeling home and safe and secure, we are starting to talk about spreading our wings.  I’m so grateful the kids now have put down roots deep enough that they can grow. I’m grateful I’m getting my balance in a way I probably didn’t have before. 

There was a lot of happiness on that family trip. It reminds me how thankful I am for this tribe of people I was fortunate enough to be born into. 

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Church and ice cream 

We went to church this morning. I realized as I was sitting there that it was the first time in years I had gone to church with another adult (besides special holidays when we go as an extended family). It was so nice to have someone to sit with during service. Little things like that can bring great happiness. In general I find that it is the little things that add up to big happiness. Time spent sharing stories and laughter, kind words and big hugs – all the things that go into making one feel warm and safe and loved.  They being happiness. 

Tonight Jenna and I had dad’s dessert. Being the northern Ontario guy that he was, maple syrup was important. So it was vanilla ice cream, maple syrup, and peanuts. We added strawberries just because they were there. Yum. It was another happiness moment sitting with her and sharing fun memories of ice cream desserts from the past. 

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Fire food

I found myself in kind of a funky mood this afternoon. I’m not totally sure why, but I was. We had planned on going to the creek for part of the afternoon and to have supper (it was maybe the best meal of the summer – I love food cooked over the fire). I am so grateful that’s what we did because it totally changed my outlook. I went from being out of sorts to laughing and really enjoying myself. Of course the fact that he brought me chocolate significantly helped with the mood shift. It was less the food and more the thoughtfulness behind it that was the reason for the attitude adjustment. 

There is a certain peace I find at the creek that I don’t find many other places. It seems to only take me a few minutes and I am completely relaxed. I’m so grateful to have a place like that and to have my tribe. Happiness. Pure happiness. 

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In the city

I tend to get so focused on the beauty of where I live that I forget how much the city has to offer. Tonight we went out for a lovely walk in Fish Creek Park. South Calgary is like foreign territory to me and it’s kind of fun to discover how much is there. Plus I had great company which makes any experience enjoyable. It’s amazing how heartwarming a little thoughtfulness and TLC can be. Happiness. 

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Fernando

I was in the grocery store with the boy today after we discovered our cupboards were completely bare. We were walking down an aisle when I heard him singing quietly to himself. Suddenly he stopped, glared at me and announced damn you and your ABBA. I can’t believe I’m singing Fernando while I’m out in public. And I laughed and laughed. 

Then we got in the car and the playlist was still on ABBA so I put on Fernando. He looked at me and said ok, but we can’t listen to this after we pick up my friend. I told him if that was the case we better make the most of it. So we car danced and laughed so hard I had to pull over so that I could catch my breath. It was an awesome moment of happiness. 

I got another one later this evening walking with the girls. It was a beautiful sunset with an amazing full moon coming up while the sun was going down. It finished off with fireworks coming from Bragg Creek. Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I can’t believe that after all the crap we went through, we are in this happy life. 

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Yard work 

Today was a day to put life back in order. I spent a few hours outside dealing with the jungle that has grown up over the last couple of weeks thanks to all the rain.

It felt good to get out and dig in the dirt a little, but it felt even better to have that solitary time to sit in my heart space and balance out my feelings. I seem to really need a little of that time every day to just come back in tune with myself. It helps me to fill up my cup so I have enough to share. 

Derek came back into the yard to visit me. He’s been off pretending to be a horse the last few days and I’ve missed him. Not the little surprises he leaves me in the yard, but I miss his presence. The dogs seemed to have missed him too 


I can’t quite explain it, but there’s something about that guy that brings e a lot of happiness. I think in part it’s that he finds the same sort of peace and security in our home that we do. 

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Unplugged

The kids were still not feeling well but the sun was shining and it’s the middle of August which means every nice day needs to be enjoyed to the fullest. I took a staycation day with him and we went to the creek. 


There aren’t enough days where the world just stops and you get to lie in the grass and look at the clouds. It is an interesting thing about being in a beautiful place that has no phone reception – you have to unplug and just be there in the moment. So we did. And it was a moment filled with happiness and peace. 

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