Tag Archives: gratitude

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Rock the vote 


For the last 8 years we have been residents of the USA. Residents, but not citizens as we maintained our Canadian citizenship. For most things this didn’t really affect me – but when it came to voting it was a constant reminder that I was not living in my own country.

It used to drive my kids nuts when an election would come and I wouldn’t go out to vote. As they got older they could better understand the fact that since I wasn’t a citizen I wasn’t allowed to vote. But, they were so well taught in school that your vote matters it still upset them (and me).

Well, today I was able to vote in our federal election because I’m in my home country, where I am a citizen,  and am allowed to cast a vote. There was no way after all the struggles that the women before me went through so that we could vote that I was not going to head out to the polls.

It does not matter (it does to me) who I voted for, the point is – being able to vote is a big freaking deal. Being able to have a say in how we want our country run is one of the things that is so wonderful about Canada. I am so proud to be a Canadian and I am proud to say I voted today and tried to make a difference. My happiness moment.

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Halelujah, Mr. Bean

We decided today was the day to start church shopping. It’s only taken us 6 months to get to this point, but better late than never I suppose. There are many reasons why it took us so long (laziness, summer, not sure where to go, wanting to sleep in….) but the one reason that had truly held me back really came to light today in service. It was hard for me to be in the house of God and talking about heaven and not think about Dad being there. Which is fine (no it isn’t) except for the sudden outbursts of tears I am prone to, and I wasn’t really excited about bawling my eyes out in front of a bunch of strangers who could ask me what was wrong. Because having to explain all that is just difficult.

So, I did go to church with a little anxiety today. I’m already socially awkward and I really didn’t need anything extra to have to worry about. Not too far into the service the minister started talking about heaven and God being there and loving us,  and my eyes started leaking. I can’t help when it happens, and once those tears start rolling they don’t want to stop. Actually, sometimes I think I really need to stop some afternoon and just have a good cry. I think I would probably feel better after it.

Fortunately God took pity on me and decided to break things up a little bit as the next hymn was All Creatures Of Our God and King. Beautiful hymn, but all I could think of was Mr. Bean singing in church and I couldn’t stop smirking. I really hope no one was looking very closely at me as I’m sure they would think I was prone to violent mood swings.

It was exactly what I needed though. Mr. Bean is awesome. But, aside from the much needed humour he brought to me, I needed the reminder that we are all awkward and “uncool” and weird at times. I was all blury eyed not really able to read the hymn words, but like Mr. Bean as soon as the Halelujah’s came along I could sing them loudly and with meaning. Then back to blahhhh blaaaahhhh blahhhh.

My happiness moment was sitting in church with Jenna beside me, Dad in my heart, and Mr. Bean in my brain. We all need each other, no one can walk through this life alone.

Yesterday I wrote about how beautiful the sunsets are here, and how I prefer them over the sunrises. Well, this morning when I woke up I was treated to this view out my front door:


Just a simple reminder that both the beginning and the end of things are beautiful and important.

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I said “good day”

I keep learning about the spiritual importance of sunrises and logically I understand why watching one is good for the soul. However for me and where I live, it has always been about the sunset. There’s something about watching the light disappear behind the Rocky Mountains that captures my heart. No matter how the day has been, if I can stop and spend a few minutes watching the sun go down I know that all is right with my world. If ever I’m filled with doubt or questioning myself or my relationship with the Divine,  all I have to do is look at what God is shining at me and I know that I’m loved and I’m safe.

We had a perfectly quiet moment (a big deal on a Saturday night) and I got this shot of the mountains and the sky reflected on the slough.

  The view to the west. No wonder I am always drawn to the mountains. 

I know I’m creating my own happiness, but at times like these, I have a pretty clear reminder that I do in fact have some help and that I’m not alone in this. The Universe is shouting with joy, reminding us of the amazing world we live in. I had a happy day and this was like happiness icing. It just topped it off!

My happiness moment today was working with Jenna as we pulled the last of the carrots and the beets out of the garden while Mom visited with us. The garden is officially done for the year and I’m grateful for all it has brought to us, not only produce, but memories of Dad and of how things were. It also reminds me that things keep changing and growing and that’s something to be embraced as well.

I am sure Dad was enjoying the sunset along with us tonight.

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Like old times. 

Today I reconnected with a dear old friend (well, not old since she’s younger than I am and I’m still not old) and I got to join her while she did what it was that we used to do all the time  back in the day. 

That thing that makes my soul sing….. I watched her riding lesson.  
There’s a lot to be said for a friendship where we haven’t seen each other in probably 18 years and yet when we get together it’s still comfortable and easy. Aside from a lifetime of catching up, it was like no time had passed. 

I feel so blessed to be back here and able to pick up lost members of my tribe. I am closer all the time to being those old ladies laughing on the streets of Italy. 

The best thing about the old tribe I am reconnecting with is that I don’t have to pretend to be anyone but myself. They all have seen me at my best and my worst, and I have done the same for them. And yet, we still like each other. None of that judgement BS that happens so often. It just is. 

Happiness has always been just being in the company of a horse. Today’s happiness moment was extra special because I got to be with a friend and a horse. 

They say your thoughts create your reality, and I can tell that I truly am reaching for better thoughts because my reality is getting better and better. Because I am shifting my thoughts I’m creating a better and happier life. As a bonus of that. I’m creating a better and happier life for my kids. 

It’s great because when good things happen it makes me want to think even more happy thoughts. It’s a very conscious walk though. I often have the choice to be either happy or upset and stressed. And I have to keep making the right decision. I don’t always, but I’m getting better at it. 

As a bonus happiness moment, I am sitting in a movie theatre with Jenna, waiting for Hotel Transylvania to start. With our Scene points we got in for free, and I get to spend the evening with one of my favourite people.  

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anxiety, ayurveda, bliss, elephant journal, gratitude, happiness, home, joy, kids, law of attraction, tapping, wayne dyer

I made it myself.

When I first began this journey of happiness I wanted desperately for someone to take my hand and show me the path. I didn’t want to have to do this alone; but not only did I want someone with me, I wanted someone to save me and show me how to live a happier life. I wanted someone to do the work so that I didn’t have to dig deep into those dark areas of my soul and expose them so that I could clear them out.

That white knight never showed up, and I’m pretty sure if I had stayed waiting for him/her I would still be waiting at the end of my dark night of the soul. I would still be hoping things would get better, but not realizing the important role that I needed to play in my own happiness.

Because I didn’t have anyone around to guide me, and because I knew that I wanted to make steps towards a happier life, I realized that the only way to move up was to start climbing myself. It was really hard at first. Actually, for a long time it was brutally hard. Being isolated both in spirit and because I was in a place without anyone that I could talk to about things made it a very lonely time.

Fortunately, I decided that I could use that time of isolation to just shut down and work on myself. I had two goals, to look after myself and to look after the kids.  I worked on building a strong relationship with the kids – and I believe that was a success – we have a tight relationship that hopefully lasts us to the end of time. I knew that I needed to make myself a better version of myself in order to be the kind of friend that attracted people I wanted to hang with. So, I dug in and I worked on it.

My Ayurvedic studies have brought so many positive changes into my life. As a matter of fact, it has completely changed how I live my life and all for the better. Ayurveda led me to the readings of Wayne Dyer whose words calm my soul. I read his works every single day and it makes me feel so good inside. It has helped shift around a lot of old guck I’ve been holding. His writings led me to the Law of Attraction books which altered how I look at the world and how I think about things. I am a firm believer in that Law and I know that I’ve been attracting better and better things into my life.  A while ago I watched a video where Wayne Dyer was talking about tapping and that information has been tingling at the back of my mind for a while. Finally I decided to do some research into it and I’ve been experimenting with myself. It’s quite amazing and powerful and I’m excited to see where that leads me. I’ve felt a lot of things move in the short time I’ve been working with it.

I have found this blog to be so cathartic. It helps me to focus on things that make me happy and to celebrate them. When I first started blogging I had to look really hard for things that made me happy because I really wasn’t feeling it yet. I was still feeling hurt, lost, sad, and confused. Now I have things pop into my mind all the time will this be the happiness moment today?  Sometimes it is, sometimes not, but there are usually many things that make me happy throughout the day. I’m always amazed that anyone actually reads what I’m writing, and it brings me joy the number of people who have told me how much they enjoy reading it.

Today’s happiness moment is one in celebration of Jacob. Both kids have been so good about being the new kid time and time again as we have moved, but I know it’s hard. Jacob was sad last year because he started a new school here only to have to leave it and head to another new one this year. I told him that we lived in a small enough town that he’d still see his friends but I’m not sure he believed me. Tonight as we were getting gas he ran into a couple of friends from his school last year. He jumped out of the car and hung out with them while I filled up. I love that when we go into town now the kids always see someone they know. They already have a strong sense of belonging and we have only been home for 6 months. I suppose that’s because we are home.

It’s good to be home. It’s good to make our own happiness. It’s good to share that happiness with the world.

This photo is from Elephant Journal. If you haven’t checked them out i highly recommend that you do. They bring me inspiration daily. 

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I have a dream… I hope will come true…

  
I think Lava has captivated me as much as Inside Out did this year. I’m kind of obsessed with both. Inside Out has helped the kids and me process through so many mixed up emotions in the past few months. Some really heavy, sad, mad, glad, weird shit. It has given us the tools to talk about our emotions and feelings in a way that we didn’t have before. 

I’m so thankful this movie came out when it did. It was brought into our lives at the exact moment that we needed it. In fact, that entire time when I had no choice but to surrender and let go and let God the Law of  Attraction made some powerful changes in our lives. 

It’s out on video now so I can watch it to my heart’s content which makes me full of joy. 

I’ve been discovering some incredible ways to let go and shift out of my body some really crappy, hurt, sad, angry emotions that I’ve been keeping held in for too long. The further I move on the path of my journey of happiness, the more I’m finding that I’m attracting the right people and the right keys to let go of those things that no longer serve me.  I’m reaching for a better and happier life for all of us. 

My happiness moment today was walking through the parking lot with Jenna. The sun was shining down on us and it was a beautiful and warm fall afternoon here in Alberta. She snaked her arm around my back and pulled me in for a big arm squeeze. Then she looked up into my face with her big, innocent, loving eyes and said I love you mom. 

Things like that are the the little moments that string together to make for a happy life. I am blessed. 

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It’s in the smiles…

One way that I know that I’m happier now than I have been in a long time is the fact that I interact with more and more people who are smiling and happy. For the past few years it seems as though the majority of the people I encountered were stressed out, overwhelmed and unhappy and it had the effect of making me the same, which I radiated back and created more unpleasantness. As I’m getting happier and happier, I’m in the company of people who are the same.

This is not to say that there are not bumps and stresses in everyone’s lives. It has been a very difficult year for me in many ways, and yet I’m a happier person than I was a year ago. It’s a wonderful feeling now when I meet people to know that we will greet each other with a smile instead of a stressed out, angry snarl. Not only is being unhappy exhausting, but when I know that many of my relationship encounters are going to be unhappy and stressful I become even more overwhelmed. I don’t have to be tense and upset in anticipation of an unpleasant encounter because generally there are none.

Now I find that I gain positive energy from the majority of the people I interact with which bounces positive energy off of me and back into the Universe.

My happiness moment today was spending the school day at the zoo with Jacob and his grade. I was one of the parent volunteers who accompanied the teachers and kids for the day (reproduction habits in animals – that was fun with a bunch of hormonal teenagers hahahaha). The teachers were all so kind and happy. Every time anything happened instead of furrowing brows and being cross, they smiled and worked through the situation. I was really impressed with how genuinely kind they all seemed to be, they certainly were welcoming to me the newcomer, and the fact that the kids were all so well behaved speaks volumes for how well this positive attitude works.


It goes without saying that the mere fact that my 14 year old actually asked me to join them on the field trip and thereby be seen in public with him was a bonus happiness moment.

As an extra special bonus happiness burst, while we were at the zoo, Jenna was home on an extra long weekend day off from school. They are weaning cattle on the ranch right now and my cousin very kindly took her riding and let her help out. For a city-turned-country kid who loves the country and loves horses this was a most magical day. Just the fact that things like this are available to us brings me gratitude and happiness.

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A thanksgiving jar full of gratitude 

We are finishing off our thanksgiving weekend in a blissful turkey and pumpkin pie coma. 

I am so happy that our first thanksgiving back, Jennas first one in Alberta, and our first one without Dad was such a raging success. There are holes in my heart from the sorrow of losing Dad, but I also feel like my heart grew four times bigger with joy, love, and happiness because we are able to spend time with our loved ones. 

Tonight’s part deux thanksgiving supper was another throw back to old times and was held at my aunt and uncle’s place. The only difference being this time I was seated at the adults table (usually I snag a seat at the kids table. It’s where all the fun happens). It worked well until the usual political discussion got heated, and then a couple of us vacated the room to make tea. It took a long time to make that tea. 

We laughed, we shared, we were together. It’s been a long time since we have had our family to be together like this with. Not a rushed visit, but a simple drive over to visit. Something to be thankful for. 

The entire day was one of focused gratitude. I woke up to this: 

  
Just in case there is ever any question as to whether or not I have things to be grateful for, the Universe gifted me with this breathtaking view from my home. 

I spent the day with my tribe, loving the fact that my kids are becoming such a comfortable part of this wonderful extended family we have. 

I finished the day with the kids and I starting a new thanksgiving tradition. We decided a few days ago that it would be a good thing this year to write down at least one thing we are thankful for and put it in a jar. We will keep the jar and add to it every year. That way we will have a record as time goes by of all the things we have brought as gratitude to thanksgiving. It was time to bring some new life to thanksgiving and we believe this will be an excellent way to do that. 

It was a big happiness day today. A whole day of gratitude and happiness. I am blessed. Happy thanksgiving everyone. 

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Family thanksgiving 

 For the first time since 2004 we are home in Alberta for thanksgiving. As if that in and of itself isn’t enough to be thankful for, today the kids and I drove with my cousins to another cousin’s house in rural south east Alberta. 

When I was a kid we used to have large family, cousin get togethers at either thanksgiving or Christmas and today was a throw back to those days. 

We ate  in the shop, which was the only place big enough to spread out the long tables for everyone to sit at. After we had eaten, and eaten, and then eaten some more; we headed outside for the traditional family baseball game. 

I have not participated in one of these games since I was a kid, but watching it reminded me of why I’m terrified of the ball. To say my family is competitive would be a huge understatement. We are competitive while still laughing lots and enjoying everyone’s company, but competitive nonetheless.   
This year I sat on the sidelines with two cousins and heckled the players. Laughed and heckled. It was perfect. 

IMy happiness moment lasted the entire as I visited and enjoyed time with my family, my tribe. I am thankful every single day that we are home. This is how I want my kids to remember their childhood – feeling safe and loved, held in the arms of their family. 

I had a bonus happiness moment when I felt an envelope be slipped into my pocket right before I left. One of my cousins wrote me a letter filled with her memories of my dad. She talked about how much he loved me and wanted to make sure my sister and I felt safe and loved and protected. It was probably one of the kindest things that has been gifted to me. And I’ve been given a lot of wonderful heart treasures to hold on to. We are very blessed and I am thankful for that all the time. 

Happy thanksgiving. 

 

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Twirl it, girl 

  
If you were to pick something that is the opposite of what Melissa would do, it’s baton twirling. Yet it seems to be a passion for Jenna. And for that exact reason I love that it’s something that we go do on Saturdays. Well, Jenna does it and I cheer her on. 

Watching her discover a passion brings me immense joy and happiness. Getting to share it with her is an honour. My happiness moment today. 

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