Tag Archives: happiness

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Yoga for the soul 

Discovering yoga was one of the best things that has happened to me. I consider myself very lucky because I have had wonderful people come into my life to guide my practice.

When we lived in Quebec, the mom of one of Jacob’s friends opened a yoga studio. She taught a wonderful gentle yoga class that was exactly what my body needed. She was so kind and welcoming, it made it such a safe and loving way to begin my practice.

When we moved to Rhode Island, my husband gifted me a weekend at Kripalu which was where I fell madly and deeply in love with how yoga made me feel. Kripalu yoga is exactly the kind of yoga I need to do. it does not care that I carry so much tension, or that I am not flexible, or that I am self-conscious.  It is slow and gentle, it is built on compassion, and for me it is very spiritual. The only other thing that has brought me closer to God is time on the back of a horse.

Sometime after I began my studies with New World Ayurveda, they started offering Healing Light Yoga Therapy. It was my first introduction to Asrael, who has become a very important guide and mentor. The sixth session of yoga classes began last weekend, and I was finally able to do the recorded version this morning.

It’s a pretty cool way to do a yoga class, she leads it online and we follow along at home. There is an amazing feeling of being bonded to the other people in the class even though many miles separate us. That energy knows no bounds. There’s a recorded version on their website so if you miss the live class (like I did) then you can do it at your own convenience.

I was thinking about what these classes have done for me. When I first started my anxiety was so intense I could barely function. I was actually really happy that the yoga class was online. Aside from the fact that it made it easier to fit into the day (with two kids and a busy schedule), being in the comfort of my own room meant that my general anxiety was lessened. Of course I was soon to discover that Asrael’s voice is it’s own kind of valium for calming my stress. My cat Ella agrees, anytime she hears her voice she comes and purrs beside the computer or the phone – which strongly violates her don’t let people know I like them rule.

Now I go for long periods (I mean usually days) where I don’t even remember that anxiety played such a huge role in my life. Before this it was an issue that had brought me to my knees and affected every single thing I did in my life.  A lot of factors have come into play to help with my healing – a big portion coming from my Ayurveda studies, my private sessions with Asrael, and these yoga classes.

I do practice my own breathing to calm and ground myself, but it so much easier for me to get to that groovy feeling when I am being guided. I was so happy today when I was lying on my mat and being reminded of how to take the big healing breaths.

This type of yoga is one that nourishes my soul. It feeds me on all levels and I consider it one of the most important parts of my healing and my growth. It’s not always easy, sometimes really yucky things get released, but it is always worth it. It may take a bit of time, but there is always a good feeling – right to the core of my being – that comes from these classes.

Today my happiness moment was lying on that mat breathing healing light into my soul.
Photo from the New World Ayurveda Healing Light Yoga Therapy site

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The digestive fire

  
Jacob: bwaahaaaa Jenna, I made your water gross. I put in mostly hot and then some cold so it’s a disgusting warm temperature. 

Jenna: that’s ok. That’s how I like it. 

Me: exactly. That’s how I do her water every morning. 

Jenna: yes. Because cold water isn’t good for you – right mom?

Me: right. It puts out your Agni – remember?- your digestive fire. 

Jenna: oh yeah. What’s your digestive fire do again?

Jacob: it ignites your farts. 

And then we all fall down laughing. It was my happiness moment, but I’m also happy that they have paid at least minimal attention to all of my talking about Ayurveda. Although like any good teenage boy, he had to turn the conversation to farting. 

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In Flanders Fields

  
The poem In Flanders Fields has always tugged at my heartstrings. I didn’t have grandparents or great grandparents who fought in the war, but I was brought up being very aware of the sacrifices that soldiers made for our country, and I have a great amount of gratitude. 

My elementary school did an excellent job of explaining Remembrance Day to us kids. They brought in soldiers who had fought and they told us their stories. They brought in holocaust survivors who told their stories and who showed us their tattoos (that visual was pretty powerful and has stayed with me all these  years later).  

In university I studied Canadian history and learned more about Canada’s role during the world wars. My appreciation for those who left and fought for our freedom grew, as it did for those who stayed and grew food (my family) or supported the war on the Homefront in other ways. 

During the time we lived in the states I got to know quite a few families who had loved ones fighting now, and I became very aware of the fears, love, pain, and pride that was felt by their families. 

This is the first Remembrance Day that the kids remember honouring in Canada. It’s been moving to see how it has touched them, especially Jacob. I am so happy and grateful to live in this blessed and beautiful country. I am grateful for all of those who have given their lives so we can live in safety and peace. My happiness moment. 

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The world is glittering 

Although I am more a warm weather person than a cold weather person, I love a quiet winter morning after a fresh snow. A close second to that is a crisp winter morning after Jack Frost has been out playing. 

My happiness moment today was my morning school commute. I’m always grateful that our drive is on my favorite road, this morning it was a stunning view with the trees covered in hoar frost. 

We had to pull over and breathe in the morning energy.  

 

I wanted to stop on the hill before home and take a photo. The whole field was lit up with glitter frost and the mountains were sharp and clear in the background. Unfortunately there was no place to pull off and I was being followed by a tanker truck, so I took a mental photo instead. 

The yard however made up for it. Sparkles everywhere while the sun shone happily down on us all.   

 
I am so grateful we live here surrounded by such beauty. It’s good for the soul. 

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Who has your back?

  
The past couple of years I’ve made a very focused effort to surround myself with the kind of people who have my back. I finally realized how important it is to have people in my life who hold me up and make me a better person. Its made me become strong enough to help others and have their backs too. It’s been amazing since I’ve made that my mindset how people who love and support not just me, but the kids as well, have appeared in our lives. 

Jacob has a teacher who is one of these special people. The three of us (with some help from the assistant principal) have been working hard to stop this Caillou name calling, bullying issue at school. Finally it seems we have some resolution. The kid has been moved away from Jacob in class, there has been no more teasing, things are settling down. 

This teacher has really stepped up and it is so impressive how she’s making sure Jacob feels safe and secure at school. I’m so glad she is there and that he was comfortable enough with her to reach out to her for help. 

My happiness moment today was when Jacob jumped into my car with a huge smile on his face. All the way home he chattered happily about his day and the things that happened at school. It’s been a long time since he’s been so carefree and light hearted about school. Warms my heart. 

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Sunday supper

It’s been years since Sunday supper was a thing in our household. A lot of the time it felt like we spent the evening preparing for the stress of the week instead of celebrating the end of the weekend. 

Since coming home again, we have had a lot more occasions to celebrate weekends, or Holidays, or sometimes just Tuesdays. 

Tonight we had an impromptu family supper up at my cousin’s place. It was more like a feast actually – roast beef (beef from the cattle they raise with tender loving care) and all the fixin’s. Easy and fun conversation around the dinner table with grandparents and aunts and uncles and parents cousins and kids. We had the  whole multi generational thing going on. 

We are so incredibly blessed to live where we do with the family and love and support wrapped securely around us. Being safe and happy in the arms of our home. My happiness moment today. 

Home is where my heart is.   

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Sushi party 

15 years ago when I was pregnant with Jacob we joined a birth and babies class through the hospital. For the first year after the babies were born most of us got together weekly for a baby group, we did baby swimming lessons together, and we had a massive baby’s first birthday party. 

All these years later there are two families that we have reconnected with. Tonight we got together for a make your own sushi party   

All the prep work was done by our gracious hosts before we arrived and all we had to do was sit, roll, laugh, and eat. It was a fantastic way to have a dinner party. 

We laughed and ate and laughed and ate and when we were too full to eat, we played Apples to Apples and laughed and played and laughed some more. 

There were tears shed, both from accidential wasabi overdoses and from laughter. 

What a great happiness moment. It is such a blessing to have friends back in our lives and to have people to laugh with.    
 

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The door to heaven 

Jacob has been struggling with his relationship with God lately. I think it’s partly his age, partly the grief of losing his grandpa, and partly learning religion in his Catholic school when he’s been raised Anglican/Lutheran. 

Yesterday we stood in the parking lot of Save On, looking at the sunset, and talking about it looking like the door to heaven opening. On the way home I had my own personal confirmation from the heavens that I was on the right path. Little did I know last night when I went to sleep that our sunset miracles were far from finished. 

Jacob woke up this morning as bright eyed as he’s been in ages. He told me that he hadn’t prayed in a long time, but before he went to sleep he had prayed for two things. He prayed to be able to talk to his grandpa one more time, and he prayed for proof that God was real. 

He said last night he had a dream that he walked over to my parents’ house and my dad was waiting there for him. They hugged and then Jacob asked his grandpa a bunch of questions about how he was doing, what it was like and other things. This alone makes me happy as my dad came to me once in a dream not too long after he died, and all I did was yell at him that if he could appear in a dream I wanted him back in real life. 

I’ve  had Jacob tell me the whole story several times today and every time it’s the same thing with the same small details. Like how God has a calm and gentle voice that makes everyone who hears him lose all their stress and worry. Or how his grandpa lives in a house exactly like his old one here and he still sees all the alive people in the house. 

There was a lot more, Jacob walked around the house with grandpa who explained to him how he was able to be there and not be there at the same time. He talked to him about heaven and about God. Jacob is in the process of writing all this down and I will let him tell his story in it’s entirety when he’s finished. 

On the way into school Jacob was once again telling me  his dream and he said I had my prayers answered.  I got to talk to grandpa again, and I now know for absolute certainty that God is real. 

  

What a miracle. I’m still processing it all. 

My happiness moment was watching The Book of Life this evening with the kids. We didn’t know what it was about, but it actually tied in nicely with Jacobs dream and celebrating the memory of those who have passed on. The kids both really enjoyed it, and I love hearing those belly laughs. 

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My Inukshuk. My path. 

The traditional meaning of the Inukshuk is someone was here, or you are on the right path. 

I spent some time today doing some energy work with Asrael. I always feel so much better after our sessions, but today seemed even more powerful. All things Ayurveda are helpful with my healing. 

Lately I’ve been working on the art of allowing  in my life. I’ve spent years either making things happen by sheer force of will, or denying myself things because I felt I didn’t deserve them. Now I’m learning to allow good things into my life. 

We spent some time today talking about this path that I’m on. I told her about all my doubts and fears and how even with those that  I have the strong feeling that I’m doing exactly what I should be doing. 

 I remind myself to have faith and to listen to that part of my soul that knows I’m doing the right thing. I can feel it, I just have to trust and honour it. I’m doing the right thing, no matter how  anyone else feels about it, or what that tiny voice of doubt says. What I’m doing is healing my soul and that has value. 

Tonight Jacob and I were driving home from school at sunset time. He told me how how school had been all lit up in the sunshine while there were clouds everywhere else. I told him how it was snowing at home. 

When we looked west there was a brilliant yellow sun shining bright and clear rays down on the foothills (by our home). I told Jacob it looked like the door to heaven was open and Grandpa was watching us. He agreed and said he could feel him around. It was like Dad had heard us talking this morning about how much we were missing him. 

As we drove on the backroad home the sunset changed into this 

   
 
An Inukshuk shining brightly in the sky. A sign from the heavens that I’m on the right path. This has been my year of miracles and spiritual guidance. I’m grateful I’m not walking this path alone. My happiness moment. My life. 

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School stuff 

Sometimes I think the best thing about getting older is the fact that it puts my junior high years further behind me. I get to relive those trying times through my kids though, and sometimes I think it’s more heart wrenching than when I was experiencing things myself. 

Jacob has settled in to his new school well and has made what seem to be a good circle of friends. But there’s one kid…. There’s always that one kid …  who seems to thrive on making his life more difficult. That kid who calls him names. 

I had a long talk with his teacher today about this teasing/bullying. We spent at least a half hour problem solving. I am so happy that he has this teacher – someone who he likes and trusts, who genuinely likes him, who knows the type of person he really is, and who has his back and wants to solve the issue. 

That was enough of a reason for my happiness moment, she finished our conversation by telling me that it was obvious from our talk what a close relationship he and I have. She reminded me that teens only  open up to people they feel safe with and trust. She said it was really nice to hear how lovingly I talked about him and how I was concerned about making sure he had a comfortable environment to learn in. She said relationships like that come only through consistent and caring work and that it showed in the type of person that he is. It made my heart glow in a beautiful happiness moment. 

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