Tag Archives: law of attraction

happiness

Fernando

I was in the grocery store with the boy today after we discovered our cupboards were completely bare. We were walking down an aisle when I heard him singing quietly to himself. Suddenly he stopped, glared at me and announced damn you and your ABBA. I can’t believe I’m singing Fernando while I’m out in public. And I laughed and laughed. 

Then we got in the car and the playlist was still on ABBA so I put on Fernando. He looked at me and said ok, but we can’t listen to this after we pick up my friend. I told him if that was the case we better make the most of it. So we car danced and laughed so hard I had to pull over so that I could catch my breath. It was an awesome moment of happiness. 

I got another one later this evening walking with the girls. It was a beautiful sunset with an amazing full moon coming up while the sun was going down. It finished off with fireworks coming from Bragg Creek. Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I can’t believe that after all the crap we went through, we are in this happy life. 

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Unplugged

The kids were still not feeling well but the sun was shining and it’s the middle of August which means every nice day needs to be enjoyed to the fullest. I took a staycation day with him and we went to the creek. 


There aren’t enough days where the world just stops and you get to lie in the grass and look at the clouds. It is an interesting thing about being in a beautiful place that has no phone reception – you have to unplug and just be there in the moment. So we did. And it was a moment filled with happiness and peace. 

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Weird things 

I asked the kids what their happiness moment today was and they said this: 

Which goes down as one of those weird things we’ve done (along with things like baton twirling) that I actually ended up quite enjoying. It was fun to watch the pack of kids (and the big kid) having so much fun. 

It was a really nice family weekend spent doing fun, normal, happy things. It makes me appreciate how blessed we are to be here living the life we do. Because what is normal for us here was not normal for us in our other life, and I’ll never take that for granted. 

My morning started like this 


A happiness moment reminding me how much I love being back home. 

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Endless summer

We have reached that point in summer where we know the end is in sight but we are in full out denial about it. It’s been such a weird summer – I feel like it should be just starting – for certain we are just starting to relax. 

But the relaxing part feels so good. This past week felt like we all finally let go of so much stress and stepped into vacation summer mode. The best mode of all. 

We spent another awesome afternoon at the creek. It was cold, but even I went in and did the full dunking and a float on the raft. I love listening to the sounds of happy people laughing in the water. Being in that place (physically and emotionally) brings so much happiness and peace. We are blessed people.

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The photo album

I have this stack of old photos that have moved thousands of miles and sat in piles for years waiting for me to organize them and put them in albums. Today I realized I’ll probably never properly organize them, but some of them at least should get put into albums.  

They’re photos of fun years. The kids were little, tiny things and we were living in Quebec. I loved our years spent in our cul de sac in St. Lazare. We had great neighbours, most of whom became close friends. The moms and kids spent hours visiting in the woods in the middle of our houses. I somehow managed to attract this awesome bunch of amazingly strong, smart girlfriends and we used to do things together all the time. It was mostly kid focused fun, but sometimes the ladies would get together for book club (the best invention ever) or a meal out no men or kids allowed. 

It was a more innocent time before most of the shit hit the fan in our family, actually in hindsight it was hitting the fan then – I just didn’t acknowledge it. Had I paid more attention to the incident and really listened to my gut I could have saved myself years of heartache. But some lessons needed to be learned the long, hard way I suppose. My girlfriends kept telling me to pay better attention and do something – but I hadn’t yet found my strength. 

It was fun to sit with some of those old memories. Fun things I used to do with the kids when they were in a completely different stage of life than they are now. They were so innocent and fun and cute. I consider it such a blessing I was able to be at home with them and watch them grow and begin to discover who they are. Happiness. 

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The Breakfast Club

We enjoyed a rainy evening curled up together in front of the tv watching The Breakfast Club. It was about the 489th time I’ve watched it and the first time for both kids. They were a little disappointed it turned out to not be about food, but they enjoyed it anyway. 

I was reminded of why it is that I was always attracted to the bad boys. John Bender always makes it look so desirable – there is that heart of gold underneath all the protective armour. In reality they’re usually just assholes. Horses did the same thing for me. The bigger the buck and the more attitude they had the worse I wanted them. That also does not translate well into human men. Thank goodness I finally understand that concept and now am attracted to kindness. Finally. 

These last few days of slowing things down and really enjoying the wonderful moments I’m being blessed with right now make me so grateful and so happy. 

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Back together again 

Today was a happiness day all around. Some days just feel like they start off with more happiness energy in them and this was one of them.  

Most importantly, the boy is back after a week away at his aunt’s house. He had a fabulous time and I’m happy for him, but I am glad our family is back together again. I consider the close relationship we have one of my greatest blessings. 

We celebrated with an afternoon at the creek which is always one of my happiness moments. Watching all the kids play and laugh while I visited with my friend was so relaxing. We have sorted through some heavy shit this week and it was nice to just chill for a while. Her strength and courage continues to amaze me. 


We finished the evening with a long walk – to work off the dessert we accidentally dove into. It took us well over two hours because my friend and I had to take off on the kid bikes for a race, we had to make the truckers honk their horns, and the kids had to go find the barn kittens  at my uncle’s house. Simple, silly happiness. 

What I’ve realized over this past week is I have in fact managed to create the safe, happy place that I was so desperately seeking when we moved back here. Not only that, but it’s now a strong enough space to share with others and hold them in as well. That makes me more grateful than I can describe. 

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Girls and chocolate 

We had a full out girls day today. We have an overflow of girl power in the house right now and I love it. There’s something that happens when a tribe of girls spend a lot of time together and we have shifted into that zone. It’s almost turned into a red tent – spiritual bonding experience. 

Two happiness moments today. 

The first was sitting on the couch this morning with my dear friend. We got into a deep discussion about how God has guided and changed our lives. We have both been down some hard roads and seen our fair share of struggles, but agreed that our paths had always been lit and we have always been carried when we needed to be. Then we kind of stopped and looked at each other. I said 25 years ago do you think our bad selves would have ever seen us sitting here curled up together on a couch talking about God? Because we used to be two bad ass girls with lots of attitude and a way of finding trouble. She said I know. And to top it off we are sitting here drinking tea. But that tea drinking conversation was happiness. 

The second happiness moment happened over dessert. About 10 days ago in a moment of insanity I decided to give up processed sugar for a while. The kids kindly have been pointing out to me that my mood seems to require that  I sweeten myself a bit more (I blame Mother Nature and her night storms that have kept me up for 5 nights now, but whatever). We went out for supper and decided as a 6 girl tribe that we needed two dessert pizzas from the Rocky Mountain Flatbread Company  in Canmore. If you haven’t been there – go! That was a wonderful little piece of heaven. In fact, we were enjoying it so ….umm…. ecstatically that we attracted the attention of another table of women who had to know what we were eating so they could feel like that too. It was chocolate heaven. And the more we ate the happier we got. And now I have a belly full of happiness. Life is good. 

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Holding on and letting go

The theme of this week has been regaining my balance. In the ideal world regaining balance means that I get what I think will make me happy (and the sooner the better). This isn’t always the case though. What always does happen is I get realigned with what is best for my soul – which always leads to happiness in the long run. 

Getting into my balanced state means finding that line of what to hold onto and what to let go of. This the constant struggle of my life. Knowing when it is time to let go. Fortunately last year I had a lot of practice in the art of letting go and I’m much more aware of how the signs present themselves in my body. My body is pretty persistent in how it keeps sending signals until I pay attention to them.  And oh it feels good to honor that intuition. 

I used to struggle more with knowing when to hold on or let go because of my fears. In the last few years I have had to walk into every single one of my fears (except for clowns and mascots – I’m still scared shitless of them) and I have come out a better person for all of it. 

Thanks to the words of my smart friend Robyn, I’m no longer afraid to love with my whole heart. As she was processing the death of her mother last year, she  pointed out that to love someone means that you know for sure you will get hurt. Either your relationship ends or one of you dies. No matter what there is pain, but we need to do it anyway. I’m not afraid to be alone – thanks to Mr. X, I know it’s better to be alone than with someone and feel alone. I’m not afraid to start over anymore, and I’m no longer afraid of losing all I have. 

What I learned for absolute certain is that while I walk through my fears I have not been alone. I learned that every single time  I asked God for help He was there on the path to pick me up and guide me. No matter what kind of a brat I was being. 

There were several happiness moments today including listening to fiddlers  at the farmer’s  market, a movie, and supper with various members of my tribe. I had an awesome friend (and tribe member) point out to be how many amazing women are in my family. That built in tribe has always been such a blessing. 

But, for some reason Derek hanging in our yard brings me a ridiculous amount of happiness. He’s kind of become my extra, outside dog. I love how we attract in those who need love. 

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Pretty toes, lighter heart 

This afternoon Jenna and I finally got around to getting our summer toes done. It’s been a full year since our last pedicure so we were well overdue for some girl time getting our toes pretty. It was a blissful joy happiness moment sitting with my girl and having some bonding time. 

As an unexpected happiness moment I unburdened myself of some things that had been hovering around my heart causing trouble. As soon as I let these worries out I felt the elephant that has been sitting on my back for the last couple of weeks vanish. You’d think at some point I would remember how much holding that in hurts me (and those around me). I need to listen to my intuition more and have more faith – always more faith. 

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