happiness

Kick sugar 

I spent part of the day going over menues with the girl today. She is on board with me and we are kicking sugar to the curb for the next month as we make better food choices. 

It’s perfect because it comes right before she and I were going to begin the 90 day wellness transformation that is part of my course. While we usually had pretty whole, healthy food; things got kind of siderailed when we moved back and then things got really bad when I broke myself and couldn’t cook. Well, except for the awesome meals that family and friends brought over. 

So we are inspired to get back to our roots and make better food choices. We both realize they make us feel better – we are happier when we eat pure foods. There is an amazing difference between how we feel on real food vs how we feel on processed crap. 

So we planned, shopped, and cooked. And now meals are planned out full of good choices. That is happiness 

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45 degrees 

In huge personal news, I lay down this morning to do some of my exercises and I was able to move my arm to about a 45 degree angle! This is a huge improvement from having no mobility at all after I broke it. There’s still not a lot of lateral movement and it still hurts like a fother mucker but it’s an improvement. 

Happy dances all around. 

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Fly me to the moon 

My boy got a chance to show me how much he loves to jump today. For the first time I put him over some cavaletti- at first he thought they were the scariest things in the world, but in very short order he was running around, jumping them of his own accord. 


The boy can jump! I love to jump. Soon we will do this together. It’s passion, passion is happiness. 

On that note, I listened to the boy talk about his hopes and dreams on the way to town. It’s an exciting time with the whole world ahead of him. I hope nothing ever happens to crush his dreams, that he never lets that passion fade. Mostly that will mean not listening to the people who tell him it’s not possible. There are lots of dream killers, with both good and bad intentions. 

Listen to your soul. Let your heart sing. Find your dharma. That is the road to happiness. 

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Small things, big changes

I got to share a little bit about what I’m learning and what I do with someone today. It is exciting to be able to share that more with people now and feel more comfortable as I keep moving ahead with it. 

I’m learning how to teach people how to change habits so that they can live a happier and healthier life. 

From small things big changes come. 

It’s happiness. 

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Rehydrate 

I met my good friend for tea today – both of us have been kind of disasters the last few weeks. She was sick and I was broken – we have made an interesting pair. 

She had gone to the pharmacy to get something to help her rehydrate because her meds had left her totally dehydrated. A lightbulb went off for me. I’ve been on these meds for a month and I know they’re dehydrating me. 

So we both started chugging electrolyte drinks and have continued until now at bedtime. I have to say I feel so much better. I’ve been working at upping my water intake anyway, but the electrolytes really have made a difference. It’s so important to listen to what the body is saying

Hydrated happiness 

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It’s as close to God as I can get


Today I was listening to Saltwater Gospel on my drive home (I am doing short drives now, which is awesome) and I got stuck on the line I’m as close to God as I can get. 

I love this song because to me it speaks about finding God outside of church. I remember years ago talking to my pastor about how I only found God outside of church, and with her wise words she reminded me that I know who God is because I learned about him in church. So, I think both are important. 

For me, my Saltwater Gospel is found on a horse. Always has been. It wasn’t until I actively started seeking out spiritual guidance, grounding, and started practicing meditation that I realized all of this I intuitively knew from my time on the back of a horse. 

And I thought of Drishti in the field. This boy I waited so long for, who I prayed for, who came to me through a miracle. I’m really sad I can’t ride him, like heartbroken. It seems so unfair that I just get him and I hurt myself so I can’t ride. 

But you know what? He’s still here. We still can work on our bond. Being with him is still as close to God as I can get. 


A couple of times in recent years I have had body issues that have forced me to stop and make a total reassessment of my life. The last time it happened with my feet, it made me change my life into the one I have now. If I hadn’t literally been stopped in my tracks a few years ago, I never would have connected with God the way I did and found the strength to get where I am – home, safe, happy, free. 

There’s a lesson in this one too. I just have to stop and pay attention to it. The last few years have been so filled with sorrow, trauma, and stress – maybe exactly what I need is to be forced to just stop and listen and get as close to God as I can get

Happiness ❤️

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happiness

As you change

I met a lady today who is also a student in the course I’m taking. Being rather introverted and socially awkward, I wasn’t sure how it would go – but it went SO much better than I could have ever anticipated. Our lives look very different, but we have walked very similar paths. It was amazing how the digger we dug the more we had in common. And she’s a fellow leftie, so you know she’s amazing.

We spent some time discussing the 10 dietary paradigms of the course and it was pretty interesting how strongly some of them had affected our lives, and how some of them we were just becoming aware enough of to  realize the impact they’ve had on us.

One that we spent quite a bit of time on was the idea that nourishment is about much more than food. I struggle all the time to digest my emotions and it shows up as health issues if I don’t figure out how to do it. It’s made me live a more authentic life, and have to be more accountable, but sometimes it still surprises me how effectively I can stuff those emotions down and pretend to ignore them.

The body doesn’t lie though, eventually I pay the price and I have to stop everything and deal with it.

It was such a great happiness moment to spend the afternoon delving into a new passion with someone who is as excited as I am. I’m really looking forward to seeing how we both grow as we carry on with this course.

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Opening the heart 

I had what could very well end up being my last session of transformational acupuncture today – he’s moving from the west to the east and who knows when another Calgary stop will happen. 

But each of the 3 or 4 sessions I’ve had with him have really been transformational. It’s amazing how working the energy lines like he does clears up blocks I’ve been dealing with for years. 

Today was letting go of the fear of being hurt and opening the heart. Drishti had brought a lot of these issues that have been simmering to the surface, but of course as I look around in my life I see them present everywhere. 

We had a few (three!) unsettling, scary episodes this last weekend and it helped put things into perspective for me. I waste a lot of time being scared of nothing. When the really big scary stuff happens I stand up and deal with it just fine. So why so scared of potential unknowns? Seriously. 

It was amazing to feel the energy shift as we worked through the session. I felt the chatter that I’ve struggled to quiet in my mind vanish and my body relax in ways it hasn’t in years. 

That is happiness. Deep, hard core happiness. 

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Stop and reorganize

I decided the best way for me to find some balance in my life again was to stop everything and clean and reorganize the house. There’s still a way to go, there’s a lot of junk we have here that does not belong in this new life, but it was a start. It’s amazing how just tidying and scrubbing some counters can make the house feel more like home. My hope is to be able to paint a couple of rooms over the summer to give them a warmer, fresher feel.

Really the only way to keep moving forward is to bring in the light instead of focusing on the darkness. For me, the best way to do this is to make sure I’m taking care of myself – sleeping enough, eating healthy food, getting exercise, hugging Drishti. As long as I’m looked after, I can look after all the other details.

Although nothing is different from yesterday, it is completely changed as well – I feel stronger and more able to take on the world again. And that is happiness.

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Healing balance

Today was a day the feelings decided to show up. I still figure I should see dad walking down the hall in the house, or wandering in the field, or sitting on the deck. I also am starting to understand that it’s real that he’s gone. It’s been two years.

Added to that has been the extra chaos so kindly added by he who shall not be named – that person who seems to want to make sure that finding peace is as difficult as possible. He feels more and more like a distant nightmare, but one that is constantly trying to stir up a storm. Exhausting and I’m done with that.

The balance though is the healing community I have around me – my family, my girlfriends, the healers in my life, the kids, Drishti, and even Dottie when she’s not being naughty.

You get to choose what you put your intention and focus on. I would be crazy not to keep mine on the wonderful gifts I have in my life. It keeps me balanced, and keeps me focused on the fact that there is always hope for things to get better and better. I am incredibly blessed that way.

As I’ve been working at growing my wellness business I have had incredible support from my mom and sister and I’m so grateful for that. One step at a time and I keep walking towards a better life. This family who comes together and lifts each other up – what a gift.

That is happiness.

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